DietCoke

Ok, here it is. How do you cope with the situations that invariably come up in your life that rekindle that urge to just say, "F**K IT, I need a drink?" What is your "happy place?"

For me it's music. I can sit in my room with the volume way up, close my eyes, and let the music envelope me. I can hear every nuance, every tone, and dammit, it's peacful as hell.

Kaibaby

For me my happy places are still in the process of "becoming."

Music is a great tool...but I'm also finding that it has to be the right kind, as some types can become a pretty big trigger.

I love to read, so books (esp. recovery books) are good places for me to go, as the words are capable o taking me anywhere.

Meetings--even the boring ones. Listening to other people share makes me remember I'm not alone in this.

But, hey, I'm just like you...still learning to find ways to fill up my time without using alcohol to zone out...and sometimes it just ain't that much fun!

Anyway...that's my 2 cents...

Heart ya...

Kai

justaround71

This is where the knowledge I obtained from Rational Recovery comes into use. When those voices appear it is very hard for me to get into my happy place so I use the tools and techniques that this program has taught me and the voices disappear. I must think rationally and logically about the situation, there is no escaping the inevitable no matter how I try to distract those voices (i.e. music, television, sports.....but if it works for you then it works for you and I respect it! Just giving my input). I must deal with them and break it down step by step until the situation seems reasonable enough to let it go. Usually people will react instantly to a stimuli such as becoming angry after someone cuts them off, without thinking they will start blasting obsenities toward the other person and let the rage bottle up. What the person did wrong here is forgetting to think and analyze the situation before acting on it and letting everything get to them. In this situation, if that guy who was cut off was a recovering alcoholic, he may end up going home and taking a drink because that event will trigger many more other situations because he let the anger get the best of him. If he would of stopped to analyze the situation with the right tools (which is too long to list here...there are many) this and all the future occurances would not have led him to a relapse. Certain things trigger instant reactions such as profanity. What emotion follows after you or someone uses profanity? Even though at times you may not realize it, always anger. We have been reinforced this way. When the word sex is said what feelings come to mind? These techniques work very well in dealing with those voices. We often don't stop and think rationally about the real situation that is taking place. Sorry if I wrote too much, I often forget I'm writing.

BTW, I'm not an AA bashing Rational Recovery member, I have found a way to combine the two and it has become very useful. Like they say, take what you want, and leave the rest.

MootPoint

For me, waking up tirggered me to want to drink (I talked about this in another post). And I haven't developed a functional happy placce yet. So I come online here at SR or read. I guess those are as close to "happy places" as I get.

So, I basically white knuckle the desire to drink. Since I drank alone and in bed, it's kinda tough. Especially since I drank to avoid being awake.

Meetings are good happy places but I have to wait until evening for those. I wish I could go to afternoon meetings, but I don't have the transportation.

SylvryMoon

My "happy place" is the zoo. I have been doing volunteer work there since March, and I have come to love the peace and serenity I find, walking through the beautiful gardens, and visiting 'my' beautiful animals.

Although I do make meetings, I have found that doing volunteer work is another way of getting out of myself. And sharing my love of animals with other people is a way of giving my recovery back.

Find some meaningful volunteer work - it made a HUGE difference in my recovery!

Ophelia

I'm with Moot, just waking up was a trigger for me. I needed alcohol to go to sleep, stay asleep, get up and go in the morning and of course to maintain a steady hand during the day. My drinking was not always like that, but in the end I had to have it just to maintain. Not a good place to be in.

Fast forward to my current happy places:

I'm an artist by profession and for the love of it. Lucky for me it's also very therapeutic! Music plays a huge roll in my happy place as well. There is nothing I enjoy more that listening to great music while painting in my studio and smoking cigarettes. I know, I know, the smoking cigarettes part is unfortunate, but what can I say, I enjoy it. Gotta take one thing at a time right?!

Music is one of the few things that has not been a trigger for me, as I have always associated it with making art rather than drinking. Bonus for me I know, as this can be a difficult one.

I also find great joy in writing, going to plays, and spending time with my dogs. Alcohol had stolen the joy of all these things away from me and I am grateful to be taking them back again while flipping alcohol the proverbial bird (just makes me feel better ).

vicki

For me, if I was awake, I wanted a drink. Didin't matter whatever the situation, music, being happy, sad, angry, depressed etc., I found out how I was obssessed with alcohol. I was afraid of everything early in recovery. I knew that I liked two places for my emotional state-elation or sedation. I didn't know nothing about being in the middle, today I am in the middle.
I have had a bad sinus/head allergy stuff lately, with coughing fits (i feel as if the is dirt in my throat), and I don't desire a drink. I would have before I experienced the solution in AA.
I came to AA because someone dropped me off and told me people might be able to help me. I didn't know what I was walking into (10 days dry), scared to death, this was on my last effort to straighten out my liffe. I thank God today for the person that dropped me off at AA altho I can't remember his name. He was a yound man going thru voc rehab at the same time I was. I ccan do all the same things I used to today without wanting a drink The problem has been removed. My biggest concern today is I heard a newcomer is supposed to be at the mtg I go to tonite, and I don't know if I'll be able to make it. This person was given my name by a few people-I have been at other AA activities and I would like to go. Good luck getting and staying sober.

PianoGirl

I was like the rest of you guys - I drank most of the time I was awake. So, it's hard now sometimes. But, I've found things that help.

If I ever feel the need to drink, I take a ride down to the beach or some reflective place out in nature (looking at the stars, etc) and just sit there thinking and looking and praying. There's no way you can look up at the stary heavens at night or watch a loud powerful wave crashing onto the moonlit shore without feeling that it makes your desire for alcohol seem much more insignificant...


Megan

marilyn s

My happy places comes and goes. Over the last 14 months of seriously fighting the alcohol demon that has ruled my life all of these years, my happy place sometimes disappears, and has gone through many changes. After all, after changing my reality for so long, my new awake reality is a big bite to chew on. What keeps me going now even though I still struggle, is when I do have times of happiness over mundane things, it's such a gift. It gives me the hope and desire to get back to where simple things make me happy, at least content. Much better than waking up every morning hating myself, and often wishing I wouldn't wake up at all.