30 Days And A Million Nights
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Virginia, USA
Posts: 449
30 Days And A Million Nights
I got my 30-day chip yesterday (Sunday)... was amazing.
I've had a pretty darn rough week with sobriety: I had an almost non-stop obsession with alcohol and wanted to drink and was feeling good and sorry for myself and was miserable. I had been depressed with rare bursts of euphoria.
However, at the state conference over the weekend, I heard a fabulous speaker who probably changed my life... she said something that has stayed with me since: We may hate or despise ourselves, be fed up or miserable and/or disgusted with ourselves, but that DOESN'T mean we aren't self-centered. In fact, it means we ARE completely absorbed with ourselves. Even outright hatred of ourselves mean we are still doing nothing but thinking about ourselves.
Isn't that just the most right-on thing you've ever heard? I know it was for me. Man did it make me realize what the heck my problem is/was.
Best of all, the solution to the problem is very simple: do everything you can to help other people. Help people in any way you can for a few days - simple stuff like help an old lady across the street, rake someone's yard, buy someone lunch, give someone a ride somewhere, clean someone's bathroom, talk to another alcoholic about their problems, etc. Do anything and everything you can to help someone else to get yourself OUT of yourself.
Anyway, I have been following this very wise woman's advice for 2 days now and have never felt more at peace or alive... no more self-pity or self-anger or self-anything.
I know the big book of AA tells us this, but hearing it so plainly explained by someone was simply mind-blowing to me!
I should mention too that I found a new sponsor at the conference... already she has been amazing! She has given me instructions to follow and has me call her every single day (and she actually answers the phone!) We may go to a meeting at a detox facility tomorrow where people will have even less sobriety than I do, which will be exciting.
The state conference was beyond amazing. I attended back-to-back "marathon" meetings in the wee hours of the morning both Fri and Sat, learned a lot, met tons of people and got probably about 20 new AA women's phone numbers. Best of all I got to actually help someone who had a few days less sobriety than me and was going through the EXACT same things I had been last week.
I've had a pretty darn rough week with sobriety: I had an almost non-stop obsession with alcohol and wanted to drink and was feeling good and sorry for myself and was miserable. I had been depressed with rare bursts of euphoria.
However, at the state conference over the weekend, I heard a fabulous speaker who probably changed my life... she said something that has stayed with me since: We may hate or despise ourselves, be fed up or miserable and/or disgusted with ourselves, but that DOESN'T mean we aren't self-centered. In fact, it means we ARE completely absorbed with ourselves. Even outright hatred of ourselves mean we are still doing nothing but thinking about ourselves.
Isn't that just the most right-on thing you've ever heard? I know it was for me. Man did it make me realize what the heck my problem is/was.
Best of all, the solution to the problem is very simple: do everything you can to help other people. Help people in any way you can for a few days - simple stuff like help an old lady across the street, rake someone's yard, buy someone lunch, give someone a ride somewhere, clean someone's bathroom, talk to another alcoholic about their problems, etc. Do anything and everything you can to help someone else to get yourself OUT of yourself.
Anyway, I have been following this very wise woman's advice for 2 days now and have never felt more at peace or alive... no more self-pity or self-anger or self-anything.
I know the big book of AA tells us this, but hearing it so plainly explained by someone was simply mind-blowing to me!
I should mention too that I found a new sponsor at the conference... already she has been amazing! She has given me instructions to follow and has me call her every single day (and she actually answers the phone!) We may go to a meeting at a detox facility tomorrow where people will have even less sobriety than I do, which will be exciting.
The state conference was beyond amazing. I attended back-to-back "marathon" meetings in the wee hours of the morning both Fri and Sat, learned a lot, met tons of people and got probably about 20 new AA women's phone numbers. Best of all I got to actually help someone who had a few days less sobriety than me and was going through the EXACT same things I had been last week.
Way to go Sobergirl! 
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: HUntington Beach,CA
Posts: 2
Congrats!
I really like what you said about getting out of yourself. Wow! It makes a lot of sense. I have three days today and have fought with this for what seems like an eternity. I will help somebody today and see what happens. Thanks for your enthusiasm, I remeber feeling that way many, many times but just couldn't keep it up.
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Sobergirl I am sitting her grinning from ear to ear! Thank you so much for helping me stay sober today!
You know when I see someone smile in the rooms or get a heart felt hug in the rooms that helps me stay sober! Just being there for someone else and just letting them know you are glad they are there whether they have one day or thirty years sober helps them.
One of the neatest days of my life was when I became part of "We"! "I" could not stay sober alone, but "We" can stay sober!!!!
In the steps I found freedom from alcohol and from self! Finding freedom from self is what has helped me the most in staying sober, once I became part of the world I started to get better, when I was drinking the world revolved around me in my head!
You know when I see someone smile in the rooms or get a heart felt hug in the rooms that helps me stay sober! Just being there for someone else and just letting them know you are glad they are there whether they have one day or thirty years sober helps them.
One of the neatest days of my life was when I became part of "We"! "I" could not stay sober alone, but "We" can stay sober!!!!
In the steps I found freedom from alcohol and from self! Finding freedom from self is what has helped me the most in staying sober, once I became part of the world I started to get better, when I was drinking the world revolved around me in my head!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: FL
Posts: 47
Hey SoberGirl!!! Congrats! I definitely found it easier to step away from the bottle when I dug deep and did work on me! It's funny how sometimes something you hear just clicks and it can make ALL the difference! You never know where it's coming from and so I always now keep my eyes and ears wide open!!!
Thank you for sharing and I'm SO very happy for you!!!
Karen
Thank you for sharing and I'm SO very happy for you!!!
Karen
ever closer...
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Greensboro, NC
Posts: 361
Sobergirl, Glad to hear from you!! I think of you often while browsing the internet since our sober date is so close!! So many on another site that I started with seem to have gone missing! At my meeting last week someone said that EGO meant edging God out. I think of tha often and will now add what your speaker said.
Have an awesome sober day!!
Have an awesome sober day!!
Relapse is not an option!
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Gardner,KS
Posts: 34
Congratulations Sobergirl, thats great!!!
I like what you said about helping another alcoholic. There's someone I work with that I've wanted to talk to about their struggles with alcohol and you just gave me that little push. Thanks!
I like what you said about helping another alcoholic. There's someone I work with that I've wanted to talk to about their struggles with alcohol and you just gave me that little push. Thanks!
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