sobergirl77

...I have to admit that it's feeling almost normal to be sober!

I'm still going to 2+ meetings per day. Last night, after the 11pm candlelight meeting, a group of us AA'ers went and played some pool. (They promised to tackle me if I so much as looked like I was tempted to wander over to the bar and get a drink!) It was a lot of fun and I discovered that I do know how to play pool sober, surprisingly enough!

Then a small handful of us went to a 24-hour diner and had some food... we were out until 4:30am. I'm really glad I'm making friends out here that don't drink! Back home in the northeast, everyone I know is still a practicing alcoholic and druggie.

I'm still having some "down" periods. My AV (Addictive voice) is trying to fool me and tell me that I'm not an alcoholic. It was especially strong yesterday before the meetings started. I have been talking about it with other sober folks, including my sponsor, and they are helping me through it. Supposedly everyone goes through this type of thing when they start feeling good again.

However, I am feeling almost back to "normal" physically - except for the fact that I'm sleeping like 11 hours per night! My body must be healing itself or something. I'm finally getting back into my daily exercise routine, too... going to take a long speed-walk along the river with my sister and niece in a little while. Then I'll be attending the 9pm meeting tonight.

Just thought I would update you all since I posted here quite frequently during my "taper detox nightmare" and spent a lot of time complaining about withdrawal symptoms and feeling miserable. Now I actually feel good!

CarolD

I am so pleased you are joining new friends in fun times!
It's always been a blast for me too.

Good to know you are feeling better.

Dean62

16 days and you are working an excellent program! Thank you for showing us how it's done!

unigirl

Great to hear how good you feeling and how your progressing. I can identify with the obsession for drink still being present at times. Im sober just over 3 months- getting through the steps but the obsession for drink hasn't left me yet fully. It has decreased significantly though - only now and again- and i havnt acted on it- saying the serenity prayer really helps me with this- also the remembering to keep it in the day. Thanks again for sharing this positive post with us, hope you continue to grow and share with us

sobergirl77

Thanks for the nice comments... my river walking plans got canceled at the last minute, so I ended up going to the 5:30pm meeting, which was good. However, an old-timer at the meeting actually told me that I'm probably not an alcoholic... I wonder why he would say such a thing? He didn't believe that I was finishing a 750ml bottle of vodka in a 24-hour period, he said "no way, your liver couldn't handle something like that".

Well, it did! (Although not very comfortably!)

That was very hurtful to me, he may as well have handed me a loaded gun and told me to go play with it!

Artur

Congrats on day 16!!! It sounds like that old timer was a little arrogent....damn I hate them types!!! Anyway, you appear to be doing the next right thing so far, and that's what counts, Right? Keep up the hard work...
Oh, and yes, it is very normal to have an array of emotions pop up...when they do, I've always been told to let em out and talk to someone about them....My sponsor says, "your only as sick as your secrets", god I hate it when he tells me that...But he's right...

Hang on strong!!
Peace, Love, and Respect,
Artur

Zanthos

Yay Sobergirl! 16 days is truly wonderful and it's great to hear you're starting to feel good.

Please remember, however, that recovery is a lifelong process, a lifelong process of change. You are just starting out on the most fantastic journey that any human being can possibly embark on. I have 3 1/2 years since my last drink, and I too am just starting out.

I have found recovery to be a lot of work and a lot of effort. And there's a lot to learn. There is also an almost inexpressible joy and satisfaction in learning how to live consistent with principles of spiritual development.

So find a home group, if you haven't already. Get a sponsor and WORK the Steps. Keep going to meetings. Go to 2 or 3 meetings a day, if you can. Read the Big Book and the 12 & 12, and every other recovery related piece of literature you can get your hands on. Find that healthy spark of life inside you, and nurture it, protect it, and watch it grow. Give yourself the time you need to become the truly amazing person that you are.

If you think you feel good now, well you ain't seen nothing yet!

sobergirl77

Well, I broke down for the first time in the meeting last night... had to run outside though because I can't stand people to see me cry! I guess all of my repressed feelings are coming out now...

KaiK

Don't worry, feelings are a good thing!* Talk with your sponsor or another member and keep letting go of all the crap...Hey... 17 days now!* Way to go!!Kai

Rimmy

It sounds like you are doing great and feeling great! So nice to see you emersing yourself around people who don't need a drink to fit into this world.

Keep it up

Dean62

Just ignore comments like that. I had that said to me more then once when I first tried to sober up several years ago.

Nobody says that kind of thing to me anymore. :wtf2

Zanthos

That's a good thing! And maybe you CAN let others see you cry, or try to.

I know that when I'm feeling bad, my instinct is to hide away. I think we're all like that. But there's something very powerful and very healing about letting yourself experience your pain in a supportive group setting. Don't deny yourself that.

RufusACanal

sobergirl77,

Great Work!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(1) Suggestion, you are new to this life, a bar is a dangerous place even with AA members.

Tazman53

Because he had his head up his posterior!!!! The rooms of AA sadly have some folks that need to simply be ignored to a point. The good thing is that there are some very good meetings with some very good sobriety, this is one reason why it is important to go to a lot of meetings early on, it lets you weed out the ones to avoid and find the ones that are of maximum benefit to you.

Pay attention to this old timer, beleive it or not you can learn from him!!! You can learn how not to be!!!!

LOL Picture a redneck looking dude with grey hair, a full beard, that looks a bit on the rough side with tears running down his face........ that has been me on a few occasions, emotions in early sobriety can be a bit overwhelming....... funny thing, I still get choked up both in and out of meetings, I get choked up here! Feelings are nothing to be ashamed of, when we are sober they are real, when we are drunk...... well they are BS!