NOMOMERLOTMAMMA

You can do this Ken!!!

Tazman53

Ken hang in there brother, going back to work after detoxing is a bear!!!! I envisioned every negative thing in the world, as you said so well, the real work has begun!!!

It will get better, little silent prayers throughout the course of the day help, simply focusing upon breathing when feeling stressed, slowing things down a bit helps. Call someone. You will get through this, look how far you have come.

Rimmy

relax and stay in the spirit of the day... do what you can and allow yourself satisfaction for whatever you DO accomplish today, whatever that winds up being. Don't focus on what you are not ready for or could not accomplish. That brings about all the negative thoughts.

Hope your day is going better than you were expecting.

Hang in there.

sobergirl77

Ken, I hope you are doing well! Congrats on 11 days now... you are only a week behind me in sobriety. :-D

About your compulsion to drink whiskey in the morning - I completely understand! A few days off the sauce and I woke up one morning craving bourbon. It was weird because 1, I rarely drank bourbon, and 2, I rarely drank in the morning! Addictions are so baffling.

Update and let us know how things are going... I'm rooting for you!

Tazman53

Ken that compulsion to drink in the morning is not unusual, dreams are another odd one, some of them are very real, I was a beer drinker so one would logically conclude that all my drinking dreams would be about drinking beer, well one of my most vivid ones was sneaking a tall water glass full of vodka!!! Straight up, glass in one hand, bottle in the other topping it off!!!

sunrise1

Ken, I am smiling at your strong spirit... you are inspiring to others of us on the same path. I will pray with you today.

bodychek

Staying sober got a little easier for me when I got out of my own world & head and reached out to talk to other alcoholics. For me, I went to 2-3 meetings a day for most of the first 60 days but it got even better when I reached out to other alcoholics after the meeting or between meetings to talk one on one. Also, I found a sponsor and a "trudging buddy" (someone with similar sober time) who I am able to share what I am feeling, thinking and doing. On top of all that, let me share something an old-timer told me the first meeting I went to, he said "don't drink f***er, no matter what". Everytime I even start to think about a drink I hear the voice of that old guy.

Tazman53

How you doing Ken?

ken67

Doing a little better today.....Day 12.

Keyboard is broke at home and I was off work yesterday, sorry for not responding.

It's really tough getting back into the swing of things at work.....everyone is used to me making many many decisions throughout the day, doing 20 things at once, organizing, delegating, etc etc.....but my brain gets a little foggy, I feel overwhelmed many times during the day, and I have to slip away and pray, relax, and calm down.

My employees are starting to notice, and keep asking me this week if something is wrong....I simply say "I think I'm coming down with something", but that excuse won't last long.
I really hope this sh!t goes away soon, my Type A personality and actions have degraded to a Type "U".....U for useless at work right now!!! LOL

On another note, most of the physical symptons are slowly leaving me, I'm still suffering a little insomnia, headaches occasionally, (I never get headaches), and anxiety, but nothing I can't handle, through prayer and meetings-at least once a day, sometimes twice.

The cravings are horrible....I wish Gatorade made a drink that tastes like Southern Comfort!!! LOL

Anyway, enough rambling......I won't drink today, and I will do my best here at work to have a productive day and provide good service to my employees and customers, they deserve my best, my problems are not their problems.
I just hope my former "best" returns soon....these "mind-phuk" games are torture.

Tazman53

Ken it will get better, it never gets better fast enough to please use "Instant Pleasure" seekers.

A good multi-vitamin and a B Complex vitamin every day along with lots of water and balanced meals will speed things along physically & mentally along with some light exercise. Rest helps a lot as well. Getting spiritually fit will make a lot of things easier to deal with.

Ken we are notorious for wanting our selfs to heal in 2 weeks what we spent a lot of years trying to destroy.

This period you are going through right now will be forgotten by your employees 6 months from now. The thing to focus on is your recovery today, taking it one day at a time will pay huge dividends in the long run.

ken67

Taz....I am doing exactly that.
I started the diet/vitamin regimen 2 weeks before my quit date, and it seems to have helped.
Thanx for the continued encouragement and support.

Tazman53

So how are your meetings going? I found it odd, but the longer I was sober and the more meetings I went to the more I enjoyed them and got out of them.

ken67

The meetings are going good.....I actually feel worthy enough to sit at the tables instead of the bench in the back!!! LOL

I am attending at least one a day, going on 7 weeks now.
I truly believe the 5 weeks I spent in AA every day before I quit gave me a leg up.

Gotta run, I'll update more later.

Tazman53

Ken I am glad to hear the meetings are going well, congrats on feeling "Worthy" LOL

ken67

The end of Day 13........a pretty good day actually.

All I have to say right now is simply thank you, to SR, and to God for keeping me sober today.

suki44883

You're doing great, ken! Congratulations!

gravity

Well?

Glad to hear that things are moving forward day by day. Sincere congratulations on 13 days - you have earned them.

ken67

Day 15.....

I sure hope it starts getting easier soon.
I sleep well, but wake up exhausted, sore, cramped muscles, tension headaches, foggy brain, blah blah blah.
Then I'll have a random thought, like right now at 5:30 am that a few big gulps of whiskey will make it go away, and that sucks because I NEVER drank in the morning!!!
It's frustrating, but I start my day here at SR, say my prayers, and trudge on.

It's going to be a long day at work today, but I will stay sober.

CarolD

You may not be aware of this Ken...

Post Acute Withdrawl - Relapse Prevention Specialists - TLC The Living Center

I can tell you that by 2 months of AA recovery
I was back in balance mentally and physically.

Mega Hugs and healing Prayers
(+) (+) (+)

ken67

Carol,
I am very aware of it, becuase of you, and read it often.
Also, because of you, I bought Under the Influence and Beyond the Influence before my quit date, and put the advice to use.
I believe it has helped tremendously, and I never personally thanked you.
So....thank you!!! :ghug3