Paulos

I swear to god he made me enraged again, I almost ripped my wall apart when I heard what he was talking about me behind my back... him and his ****** dolls and Hade candles... that he's wishing curses against me... *no joke actually* and I have to LIVE WITH THIS? How can I be SOBER WITH A FREAK like this when I'm being CURSED AGAINST DAILY?

Even with all this my OCD still remains, and it's day 7 and I have no access to booze which is probably a good thing, but I tell you I'm beginning to understand more and more why people do fail and have problems with giving up drinking when they have bad family members... this ... crude... old... bickering ******* of a man has the nuts to try to curse things against me? His only grandson? After all I and my mother have done for him? OF course my mother does nothing to my grandfather, so I call him the Luckiest Man Alive, grr...

Least my former stepfather calmed me down... almost smoked a cig... if I didn't calm down we would have had a major domestic problem... stupid STUPID old man... STUPID OLD MAN... I saved my family no anguish by NOT doing anything and just forgetting it as always for my mother so I didn't beat the son of a bitch badly...

Well anyway sorry for posting such a hostile message, but it is related to my sobriety due to the fact that I could have drank from this...

tellus

What comes to mind, to me, is a bit of the AA book: This was our course: We realized that the people who wronged us were perhaps spiritually sick. Though we did not like their symptoms and the way these disturbed us, they, like ourselves, were sick too. We asked God to help us show them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that we would cheerfully grant a sick friend. When a person offended we said to ourselves, 'This is a sick man. God save me from being angry. Thy will be done.' (From "How It Worksfirst edition BB)

Sounds antiquated and religious, but there's helpful nuggets in there. If Gramps is vindictive and a bit around the bend, that's his problem. You can't change how he is, so don't let it bother you. Or if he's really treating you intolerably, maybe have a conversation with your mom about it?

1is2Many

Maybe you should ask them to leave your house.

reed

If they are are not going to help you get better, maybe they should leave.

warrens

Paulos

I think there are many ways to look at things like this. First, he is not your spouse, your child, or even your parent. You can CHOOSE whether or not to give him the power to affect your mood or even your life.

Since I have been on my own for 40 years, it is hard for me to relate to not having a choice who I live or interact with. That might be something to think about. Working toward independence, I mean. Control over your life and your environment.

But, if someone were casting spells and sticking pins in dolls on me, I would find it HILARIOUS! Man, you could have some fun with that if you get creative. Come up with some fetishes of your own, stick them on his door, and let him try and figure them out. Mess with his world a bit. I mean, I find video games as boring as watching paint dry, but I could look forward to this! A real life video game! Choose a role and play with it.1

Choose who you give power to, Paulos. I do not give power to those who are toxic to me. Even if they are my boss or spouse. You must give others permission to mess with you. Really. You have a choice.

warren

WLDKATZ

LOL
OMG Go out and get a board!!!!!!! Paulos, you are a quit inventive young man.........lol mess back with him honey find your sense of humor!!!! try the ouiji board!!!! Warn your parents of course! Then have fun.......wish his hair gone or look up from the board startled like you didnt see him there and say omg it IS falling out grandpa! Some times the older people in our lives try us the most....laugh at life baby boy!!! It is worth it and some what side splitting if you let it happen!!! What back ground is your grandfather to do things with the dolls??? I didnt mean to and I know it made you mad but it reminded me of something so I just had to comment......better yet find out what he has cursed you with and mess with him about it.......lol


Good luck honey!!!!


Pamm

WLDKATZ

Warrens we are thinking alike and that scares me
lol



Pamm

Tazman53

Paulos do you beleive in vodoo? If not why even let it bother you? When it comes to sobriety there is only one person that can get me drunk and that is me!

The only way some one can effect me is if I let them do it. Of course that does not hold true if they hit me with a baseball bat, but if they are just talking about me.... so what?

warrens

Hah Pamm!

Some people make it so easy to have some fun. Hell, I'd PAY to have that dude in my log cabin for a week! Paulos, you could RENT him out! Put an ad in Craiglist for chrissake! Do you have any idea how many ex spouses would pay dearly for his services? Oh man, we could franchise the cat...

warren

unigirl

I think 'tellus' got it in 1 ! Keep strong Paulos you are doing great- hard times make us stronger - its cliched but it is cos it's true!

tiburon88

****** is real. I encountered people who messed around with when I lived in the little Havanna section of Miami.

GlassPrisoner

The Big Book mentions something about resentments, real or fancied.

In my 4th and 5th step, I swore up and down everyone was out to get me. Turns out it wasn't quite so.

Paulos, keep your side of the street clean. Work your recovery to the best of your ability, and never mind what others are doing. THings will get better, and your perceptions and attitudes will change.

That's what I was told, and that's what I've found.