Life on life's terms
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Boston MA
Posts: 666
Life on life's terms
Hi to all
I haven’t been around much lately. Life’s kicking in big time. I also didn’t want to get dragged into one of the threads here that bashed AA. Funny thing – there are thousands of other threads here, but this drunk picks out the one that bothers him to focus on…think I need to work on a few things?
Anyway… I wasn’t back here five seconds before the inimitable BarbDwyer, one of my heroes, sends me a post asking how I am. That’s the beauty of this place. Anyway… it got me thinking.. how am I really? I’ve been up since 3 thinking about my week… maybe sharing can help…here’s where I am…
I'm back in school two nights a week and found out that in addition to a literature review (qualifying paper for my dissertation) I have huge amounts of work to do in both classes. This is in addition to having to plan five separate lessons in three different subject areas each day which I have to deliver in split groups to two different grade levels each period.
The school where I teach is under a "quality review" process in which strangers are poking all around all day asking questions, and yesterday there was a gang-related fight in the back of the school. Only the principal and myself were there to break it up, and then we chased the kids down the street so we'd know where to direct the cops.
My one year old son Liam fell down and bumped his head, not bad but scary.
The worst of it all, however, is that at work my colleagues elected me union rep, which is good, but today 11 teachers and 9 paraprofessionals were told that they have no job next year. My school does not have full union rights, so the admin can do as they please in regards to hiring. I had to attend each meeting and couldn’t do anything but sit and listen and clean up the mess afterwards. Lots of tears, anger, and bewilderment. Some were new teachers trying to find their way, some were veterans, and all had their livelihood taken away… some for nothing other than personal reasons. It was awful.
Anyway... sorry for the rambling rant, but that's where I am.
Positive thinking, right!
At least I'm not drinking. Nor do I plan to.
The funny thing is, if I look at this another way, it is all good. I was there for some people today. Twelve years ago I could never have done this, could never have been a teacher, certainly my colleagues would not have nominated and elected me to represent their interests, no way would I have been a dad, and I certainly would not have been in a doctoral program.
Whew!! Anyone that read this far, thanks. That’s the longest post I’ve ever written. A little self-centered, but therapeutic. It was good to lay it all out and now I actually am feeling some gratitude. Talk to you all later. Wish me peace today. I'm getting to old to be chasing gangbangers down the street!
Mike
I haven’t been around much lately. Life’s kicking in big time. I also didn’t want to get dragged into one of the threads here that bashed AA. Funny thing – there are thousands of other threads here, but this drunk picks out the one that bothers him to focus on…think I need to work on a few things?
Anyway… I wasn’t back here five seconds before the inimitable BarbDwyer, one of my heroes, sends me a post asking how I am. That’s the beauty of this place. Anyway… it got me thinking.. how am I really? I’ve been up since 3 thinking about my week… maybe sharing can help…here’s where I am…
I'm back in school two nights a week and found out that in addition to a literature review (qualifying paper for my dissertation) I have huge amounts of work to do in both classes. This is in addition to having to plan five separate lessons in three different subject areas each day which I have to deliver in split groups to two different grade levels each period.
The school where I teach is under a "quality review" process in which strangers are poking all around all day asking questions, and yesterday there was a gang-related fight in the back of the school. Only the principal and myself were there to break it up, and then we chased the kids down the street so we'd know where to direct the cops.
My one year old son Liam fell down and bumped his head, not bad but scary.
The worst of it all, however, is that at work my colleagues elected me union rep, which is good, but today 11 teachers and 9 paraprofessionals were told that they have no job next year. My school does not have full union rights, so the admin can do as they please in regards to hiring. I had to attend each meeting and couldn’t do anything but sit and listen and clean up the mess afterwards. Lots of tears, anger, and bewilderment. Some were new teachers trying to find their way, some were veterans, and all had their livelihood taken away… some for nothing other than personal reasons. It was awful.
Anyway... sorry for the rambling rant, but that's where I am.
Positive thinking, right!
At least I'm not drinking. Nor do I plan to.
The funny thing is, if I look at this another way, it is all good. I was there for some people today. Twelve years ago I could never have done this, could never have been a teacher, certainly my colleagues would not have nominated and elected me to represent their interests, no way would I have been a dad, and I certainly would not have been in a doctoral program.
Whew!! Anyone that read this far, thanks. That’s the longest post I’ve ever written. A little self-centered, but therapeutic. It was good to lay it all out and now I actually am feeling some gratitude. Talk to you all later. Wish me peace today. I'm getting to old to be chasing gangbangers down the street!
Mike
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 1,924
Morning Mike. Thank you for reminding me of the miracle this morning. The miracle of a new life is more than apparent in your resolve to live differently, much differently than twelve years ago. You have hope. Remember when the old life was hopeless? Thank you my friend for your work as a teacher, thank you for your representation of your co-workers and thank you for thinking of us as you share true experience, strength and hope that we may know the success of a member no longer in the clutches of Alcohol. I am spurred to action by your courage and grateful for this example of humble service you provide. Have a damn good day and again thank you!
"Rarely have we seen a person fail, who has throughly followed our path"
Chapter Five, First Edition, Alcoholics Anonymous
"Rarely have we seen a person fail, who has throughly followed our path"
Chapter Five, First Edition, Alcoholics Anonymous
Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Pugetopolis
Posts: 2,384
I know how you feel Mike. Life gets that way sometimes. I know mine does. What I have found is that I can either resist it andget overwhelmed and crazy or go with the flow. After all I'm in the stream of life. It will take me where it takes me. Usually the water is smooth, but sometimes there are rapids and the water is rough. Contrary to what you hear in AA meetings, the isn't a "mainstream" of life. There is no mainstream and minor stream. There is the stream of life. I'm either in it or I'm not.
Life doesn't make terms, I make the terms.
I can either live on my terms or "life's terms" if you will, or on God's terms.
Life's terms are harsh: "Early bird gets the worm," "He who dies with the most toys wins," "Keep up with the Joneses," "Screw you before you screw me," you get the picture. Living on those terms, I see the world as a cruel and hostile place and life as something to be mastered, rather than something to be lived and experienced. Society views life as something to get all you can get out of. Society teaches us that the American dream is something to be pursued at all costs. Happiness is something to chase and get and hold.
God's terms are gentle. God's terms are giving rather than getting. God's terms are kind and tolerant. Living under God's terms, I see the world not as a cruel and hostile place, but as a big and beautiful place where all men and women are my brothers and sisters.
By the way, the idea of "life on life's terms" comes from Dr. Paul O.'s story, which has literally became accepted as gospel in most AA circles.
Jim
Life doesn't make terms, I make the terms.
I can either live on my terms or "life's terms" if you will, or on God's terms.
Life's terms are harsh: "Early bird gets the worm," "He who dies with the most toys wins," "Keep up with the Joneses," "Screw you before you screw me," you get the picture. Living on those terms, I see the world as a cruel and hostile place and life as something to be mastered, rather than something to be lived and experienced. Society views life as something to get all you can get out of. Society teaches us that the American dream is something to be pursued at all costs. Happiness is something to chase and get and hold.
God's terms are gentle. God's terms are giving rather than getting. God's terms are kind and tolerant. Living under God's terms, I see the world not as a cruel and hostile place, but as a big and beautiful place where all men and women are my brothers and sisters.
By the way, the idea of "life on life's terms" comes from Dr. Paul O.'s story, which has literally became accepted as gospel in most AA circles.
Jim
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Boston MA
Posts: 666
wow. it was nice to come home after along drive with the family and see all these replies. Life is good today under God's terms. The ocean was wild and awesome today. I took it all in and now am ready for bed. Unfortunately, the kids are raring to go. Life on life's terms. Thanks all.
Mike
Mike
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