hypochondriac

Welcome to SR Art and thanks for reviving this thread... it has certainly made me feel less alone in my experiences!

I have had the racing thoughts v no thoughts thing, either I'm talking non stop or I can barely get a word out, and sometimes I just can't say words even after trying a few times...

I keep spelling words phonetically which has been freaking me out because I'm usually an ok speller, I feel like my brain has turned to mush sometimes.

I have to really concentrate doing simple tasks because sometimes I mix things up, like pouring water into the coffee jar instead of the cafetiere!

I am constantly exhausted and have no motivation.

My concentration is really bad and I can in no way sit down long enough to watch a film, and a friend on the bus always laughs at me because I constantly have a book open on my lap but never seem to be reading it!

It's all way better than being drunk though It can only get better.

Art89b

Hey guys thanks for the support, this made my day!

I have a quick question, my mother knows how much trouble it is for me to sleep, and she bought me some "ZzzQuil" today to see if I can get at least a few hours of quality sleep. As I was reading the label I noticed that it contains 10% alcohol, would it be possible for this to cause a relapse? I'm desperate for some sleep, all I can do now is lay in bed, feel extremely tired, but have absolutely no quality sleep. thank you guys!

Dee74

Welcome Art

I personally wouldn't take anything with alcohol in it - I remember when I used to drink myself to sleep I didn't actually sleep - I passed out and woke up with a start about 3am

A little insomnia is normal for a week or two - if it's concerning you or significantly impacting your life in a negative way, it really is best to see a Dr

there are some common sense tips here too
10 tips to beat insomnia - Live Well - NHS Choices

D

Art89b

Thanks! Yeah, I have not been able to sleep properly for about 4 months now, and I been to the Dr. twice, but they just keep saying I'm fine after a few tests. I've also noticed that I have trouble breathing from my nostrils, so perhaps that can also be the cause of my sleepless nights. I gotta make another appointment asap.

Dee74

I would, art yeah

D

F355

I too have struggled with insomnia since quitting. Another symptom I get a lot is a mild tingling sensation on the top of my head that is usually accompanied by anxiety. Not sure why though, but I'm assuming PAWS.

Art89b

Yep, same here! I get that tingling sensation on top of my head followed by some back neck pressure and anxiety, it really does suck!

Jerichoholic

Ohhhh man. When it first happened to me at the beginning of the year, I didn't know what was going on? Whether it was depression or linked to drinking? I had a terrible breakup last year and the fighting lasted from April - November and I drank heavily last year. More than previous years. One morning after not alot of sleep and drinking, I felt something weird, like there was a demon inside me making me feel sad, angry, scared, depressed all in one. I can't really explain it. To just wake up feeling like that. I read that PAWS can happen in a sober state or a intoxicated state, not sure if that's true. But, the on-going symptoms after I stopped drinking was terrible anxiety, stress, racing thoughts, headaches, depression, hopelessness, fatigue, mood swings, you name it. I stopped drinking for about 4 months and felt like I was slowly getting better. I was starting to have good days. I started drinking again. Not as much, but on weekends with my buddies and was still getting bad hangovers and depressed for a few days until it wore off. I have stopped again for the last 2 weeks and it feels like I am stress sensitive or something? Does that make sense? When I am not thinking about it and my mind is focused on work or something else I am fine. But, all of a sudden it hits me and I feel like I want to cry all the time, but can't. My eyes feel heavy, head feels a bit full of pressure and I get easily emotional. I have never EVER been like that since I was a kid. I do suffer from some anxiety, but that could have been caused by stress or alcohol? Anyone else have the emotional part? Thanks

Dee74

Hi and welcome Jericoholic

While I had days of intense emotions that didn't really seem related to any events in my life, it was isolated days not a continuing thing.

Have you thought about seeing somebody about it or is it not that bad?

D

Auvers

The things you describe have similarities to my experience. You said things were getting better about 4 months sober. I had improvement at 3 months, more at 4 months and even more at almost 5 months now. Definitely stress sensitive, no doubt. Actually my emotions have been flat, no affect, but from what I have read PAWS can take on different aspects for different people. Sounds like the "kindling" effect with your symptoms worsening after you started back with alcohol. Good you have 2 weeks sober. Maybe your doctor could prescribe something to help. Exercise, good nutrition, vitamin therapy especially B vitamins could help.

Jerichoholic

I feel fine when I'm busy, but when I start thinking about it I get all stressed out, almost overreacting and wonder why the hell I feel the way I do. I get the stress headache alot through the day. Feels like a vice is on my head or in the front of my head. I am tired all the time. I feel like hell when I wake up some mornings. And I get very anxious most days. Is this all part of the process from anyone's experience?

Andante

Doing my part to bump this thread up. As my few previous posts will attest, I have a LOT of trouble with PAWS (actually, if it weren't for the severe case of "writer's block" that's one of my PAWS symptoms, I'd post a lot more), and it's so comforting to read that I'm not the only one.

Onlytheone

I joined this forum recently to try and find out what has been wrong with me for the past couple of weeks. I thought I would share my story of what I am currently going through and what I feel to be PAWS.

My past: 2 1/2 years of ecstasy at least once a month between 4-8 pills a night depending upon the night. 3 years of smoking marijuana. In the beginning only smoking a couple times a week but towards the end smoking everyday for about a year.

I have been clean and sober for about 5 months now but up until 3 weeks ago I have felt 'normal'. I know the 5 months before I havent really felt myself but nothing like I have felt these past couple of weeks.

When I got sober I was working out about 5 days a week running between 2-3 miles. I was feeling happy and fine. Up until about 2 months ago I stopped hanging out with my running friends due to the girlfriend getting sick because their house was always dirty from pets and the driving distance. I continued to eat healthy but didnt work out. About 3 weeks ago I felt like the mental bus just ran me over and I was being dragged away in a white jacket.

My symptoms 3 weeks ago were very severe and I have never felt anything like it.
Depression, anxiety, tingly sensation on the top of my head, panic attacks, worried about everything, emotional detachment, suicidal thoughts, felt like I was lying about the love for my girlfriend, racing thoughts, no sexual drive, headaches, pressure on my temple (like someone said above felt like a vicegrip on my head) cloudy mind, unable to process thoughts, just felt empty, lonely, body would shake uncontrollably while I was worrying. This lasted for about a week. I was in the ER because I didnt know what was wrong with me. The ER DR gave me a shot of ativan which I almost crashed on because of how it made me feel, then he prescribed me xanax. I took the xanax to help with the shakes but later i started googling what might be wrong with me and discovered that I am probably going through PAWS. I read that PAWS peaks around 3-6 months which fits my timeline perfectly. The symptoms fit and the stories I have read from others fits. I have since stopped taking the xanax. Last week was better than the first week but I had a day of severe depression but it got better as the days went on. For about 3 days I had a foggy mind that I just didnt feel anything or could think about anything. This week I have felt better but not like I would like to feel. Today has been a pretty normal day but still have a little headache and sometimes find myself worrying about PAWS or my relationship. I have got a gym membership and plan to work out lightly at the gym. I have been walking almost everyday with my girlfriend. This seriously feels like an emotional rollercoaster and I am just hoping and praying I am not like this for the rest of my life. Reading I have found that it can last from 3-24 months. I hope I can regain normal thought and emotional attachment to my girlfriend. I talk to her everyday about how I am feeling and the research I have done on how it makes me feel that it is nothing personal against her I just dont have control over it.

I have been trying to find stories of people who have experienced PAWS and have overcome everything and have gotten back to normal but I have yet to find a story like that. Either those people are not online or after feeling normal again never return to tell others that its going to be ok. I find myself reading the same articles day after day that says it will go away and it will be ok but its personal stories I keep looking for.

If I could go back I would kick myself in the face to never touch drugs ever.

Heres to hoping for better days and feeling normal again

Right now since the change to sobriety I only have my girlfriend in my life. I have no friends because I have defriended(word?) them because I had to get away from that life. They were good people but they were not ready for a change and I couldnt be around that life anymore. I have had to give up the music I listen to because I would find myself just reminiscing.

I think getting some new friends in my life will help a lot but I just cant really connect with anyone anymore and finding people who are wanting to hang out just dont seem to be out there anymore.

Hope everyone who is going through this stays strong and comes out normal on the other side

Onlytheone

Oh I see this was posted in the Alcohol subforum of this page. My apologies members I was just doing a google search on PAWS and was brought to this page.

sugarbear1

At 18 months my symptoms are mostly gone, only tomorrow will tell if anything comes back up. In fact, my memory is improving greatly now. We do recover!!

Edabisco

This pretty much describes exactly what I've been going through, and I'm glad I found this thread. It's like living in a fog, or at the bottom of an aquarium. I've always had neurotic issues, OCD, that kind of thing, so I think it's related to PAWS as well.

sugarbear1

Something to look forward to, of all of the hundreds of recover(ing) or (ed) people I know, almost 100% now have a unique and striking ability today (several years into recovery) ranging from artistic talents to mathematical abilities that are amazing (too many to list)!!!!

Ubermensch

I quit drinking July 7th 2012 after 6 years of heavy drinking (drinking Wine and Vodka every day after work and more on the weekends). I’ve quit drinking about 4 times in those 6 years for period of weeks to 6 months. Of course, I wasn’t aware of the “Kindling” effect that this was having on my brain, which caused me to have bad withdrawal in July followed by PAWS.

As far as PAWS, I have had extreme panic and anxiety attacks, racing heart, tremors, dry mouth, depression, crying, and loss of appetite, sweating, headaches, waking every hour with panic and anxiety, racing-repetitive-ridged thoughts, and nausea, dizziness, hot flashed and cold flashed. The terrible thing about it is that I was fine for about a month after I quit drinking but then I began having mild anxiety that progressed to an extreme.

I did not know about PAWS so I went to the Dr. who gave me Ativan and Xanax, which I took sparingly (a total of 18 .5mg pills over a 3 month period) . Once I became aware of PAWS and alcoholism, I learned that taking these medications was very bad for me and I stopped taking them after a one night relapsed on November 25th (the one night binge exasperated the PAWS and I took a Xanax in the AM and PM for 5 days and felt like I was going to die).

December was HELL. I lived off Ensure because my guts hurt so badly from the panic, anxiety, depression. I cannot express the feelings of hopelessness I felt. It is like being in a nightmare that you cannot wake up from. I two halfway decent days late December but felt like crap again for half of January. February I had a 10-day stretch of feeling decent and now I’m on day 4 of hell.

Can anyone relate to this or am I alone? Will I get better? I don’t want to be medicated.

Onlytheone: do you feel better?

bigsombrero

Hey, we have the same quit date, mine was also 7/7/12. Nice to see you here and thanks for posting Ubermensch. Thanks for that post too, it really helps to see where you're at too.

Dee74

Hi Ubermensch - welcome

I think when anxiety gets chronic like that it's probably best see a Dr or a counsellor - that kind of prolonged intense panic/anxiety was not my PAWs experience at all.

While I'm not a Dr, it does sound a lot like my experience of Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) tho?

Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD): Symptoms, Treatment, And Self-Help

D