How Bad Do I Want It????
Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: some where / no where
Posts: 1,019
Hi Dee_sober4today
Thanks for posting this. Congrats on your sober time.
Work is work, and we've all got to do what we need to do to feed our families. I work in the hospitality industry as a bar manager. Like any job, there are things about it that I don't like. It can be a dirty job.
I found early on that I could work on my attitude and perspective. When I am spiritually fit, and I look at the booze for what it is...poison for me... I don't have a problem. My personal rule is not to go into a bar, liquor store etc... unless I have legitimate business. When I have legitimate business, I focus on my work and not on the drinking.
Sometimes I catch myself looking at a drink, or smelling it and having a nostalgic thought. A cold beer on a hot day looks nice to me.....this is normal for an alcoholic. I accept this as a part of my condition. I have no control over my first thought...but...I have control over my second thought. My second thought usually is: "it's silly to think about this because you, chip, are an alcoholic and you can't drink". Most of the time, booze has become almost invisible to me. I'm around it so much that I hardly think about it at all.
This can be dangerous. I keep active in my recovery and depend on God to stop me from drinking.
The next drink is only as far away as our reach. This is true for anybody. Alcohol is accessible, and advertised heavily. There are liquor stores and bars everywhere. I don't think working in the liquor industry makes a sober alcoholic more prone to a slip. This is only my opinion, based on my experience in the industry. My sobriety is my #1 priority. Drinking is not an option for me anymore. Not having the option of drinking makes things easy for me to stay sober.
I think alcohol is very important to society and our ecconomy. I found that I need to remember that I am the one with the problem. Another thing I needed to face was my resentment that I couldn't drink anymore. Sometimes I catch myself being jealous of people who can enjoy alcohol. Acceptance is important for me here... I accept that I may feel this way because I am an alcoholic. I can choose to let this upset me, or I can accept this and try to move on.
When I have a rough time, I break the time down into hour by hour...even minute by minute. When I first got sober, I would even go craving to craving. I did have a hard time at work early in my sobriety..but..it got better.
I think the key thing will be to make sure you have the support you need. Having people to talk to is important. I know this website has helped me through some difficult times with my job stress etc..
If you are offered the job, I hope you can find a way to make it work out. I hope we can provide you some support as you work to do the right things for yourself and your son.
chip
Thanks for posting this. Congrats on your sober time.
Work is work, and we've all got to do what we need to do to feed our families. I work in the hospitality industry as a bar manager. Like any job, there are things about it that I don't like. It can be a dirty job.
I found early on that I could work on my attitude and perspective. When I am spiritually fit, and I look at the booze for what it is...poison for me... I don't have a problem. My personal rule is not to go into a bar, liquor store etc... unless I have legitimate business. When I have legitimate business, I focus on my work and not on the drinking.
Sometimes I catch myself looking at a drink, or smelling it and having a nostalgic thought. A cold beer on a hot day looks nice to me.....this is normal for an alcoholic. I accept this as a part of my condition. I have no control over my first thought...but...I have control over my second thought. My second thought usually is: "it's silly to think about this because you, chip, are an alcoholic and you can't drink". Most of the time, booze has become almost invisible to me. I'm around it so much that I hardly think about it at all.
This can be dangerous. I keep active in my recovery and depend on God to stop me from drinking.
The next drink is only as far away as our reach. This is true for anybody. Alcohol is accessible, and advertised heavily. There are liquor stores and bars everywhere. I don't think working in the liquor industry makes a sober alcoholic more prone to a slip. This is only my opinion, based on my experience in the industry. My sobriety is my #1 priority. Drinking is not an option for me anymore. Not having the option of drinking makes things easy for me to stay sober.
I think alcohol is very important to society and our ecconomy. I found that I need to remember that I am the one with the problem. Another thing I needed to face was my resentment that I couldn't drink anymore. Sometimes I catch myself being jealous of people who can enjoy alcohol. Acceptance is important for me here... I accept that I may feel this way because I am an alcoholic. I can choose to let this upset me, or I can accept this and try to move on.
When I have a rough time, I break the time down into hour by hour...even minute by minute. When I first got sober, I would even go craving to craving. I did have a hard time at work early in my sobriety..but..it got better.
I think the key thing will be to make sure you have the support you need. Having people to talk to is important. I know this website has helped me through some difficult times with my job stress etc..
If you are offered the job, I hope you can find a way to make it work out. I hope we can provide you some support as you work to do the right things for yourself and your son.
chip
Last edited by chip; 01-05-2008 at 11:02 PM.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Arizona
Posts: 872
Dee
That would be a tough one for me... even at 3+ years. I am praying for you and thinking about you... Budweiser was my nemesis as well... but was it? Or was it me?
Taz, I really like what you said about the sugar salesman (my current demon)... good comparison!
Dee, everyone has said some great things on this thread, so I don't know if I have much more to add. You have to pay the bills -- if you are uncomfortable and NEED to take the job, take it and continue to explore other options. If another job comes up that you want, maybe discuss why you'd be taking the other job with the 'Bud man...' I'm sure he would understand.
Just PLEASE keep your spiritual house in order, stay close to your sponsor and especially to meetings and God...
Ken
That would be a tough one for me... even at 3+ years. I am praying for you and thinking about you... Budweiser was my nemesis as well... but was it? Or was it me?
Taz, I really like what you said about the sugar salesman (my current demon)... good comparison!
Dee, everyone has said some great things on this thread, so I don't know if I have much more to add. You have to pay the bills -- if you are uncomfortable and NEED to take the job, take it and continue to explore other options. If another job comes up that you want, maybe discuss why you'd be taking the other job with the 'Bud man...' I'm sure he would understand.
Just PLEASE keep your spiritual house in order, stay close to your sponsor and especially to meetings and God...
Ken
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 1,924
"In our belief any scheme of combating alcoholism which proposes to shield the sick man from temptation is doomed to failure. If the alcoholic tries to shield himself he may succeed for a time, but he usually winds up with a bigger explosion than ever. We have tried these methods. These attempts to do the impossible have always failed.
So our rule is not to avoid a place where there is drinking, if we have a legitimate reason for being there. That includes bars, nightclubs, dances, receptions, weddings, even plain ordinary whoopee parties. To a person who has had experience with an alcoholic, this may seem like tempting Providence, but it isn’t. You will note that we made an important qualification.
Therefore, ask yourself on each occasion, Have I any good social, business, or personal reason for going to this place?"
Working with Others, pg 101
So our rule is not to avoid a place where there is drinking, if we have a legitimate reason for being there. That includes bars, nightclubs, dances, receptions, weddings, even plain ordinary whoopee parties. To a person who has had experience with an alcoholic, this may seem like tempting Providence, but it isn’t. You will note that we made an important qualification.
Therefore, ask yourself on each occasion, Have I any good social, business, or personal reason for going to this place?"
Working with Others, pg 101
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 1,924
"We are careful never to show intolerance or hatred of drinking as an institution. Experience shows that such an attitude is not helpful to anyone. Every new alcoholic looks for this spirit among us and is immensely relieved when he finds we are not witch-burners. A spirit of intolerance might repel alcoholics whose lives could have been saved, had it not been for such stupidity. We would not even do the cause of temperate drinking any good, for not one drinker in a thousand likes to be told anything about alcohol by one who hates it.
Some day we hope that Alcoholics Anonymous will help the public to a better realization of the gravity of the alcoholic problem, but we shall be of little use if our attitude is one of bitterness or hostility. Drinkers will not stand for it.
After all, our problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody or anything. We have to!"
Working with Others, pg 103
Some day we hope that Alcoholics Anonymous will help the public to a better realization of the gravity of the alcoholic problem, but we shall be of little use if our attitude is one of bitterness or hostility. Drinkers will not stand for it.
After all, our problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody or anything. We have to!"
Working with Others, pg 103
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 47
Dee,
Always great to hear from you! How did the job situation go? As stated earlier by someone, I also firmly believe that these things happen for a reason. And sometimes we have to rise above them to become better ourselves.
I think, no matter what you choose with respect to the career, it will be the right decision for you.
Please keep us updated!! I'm itching to know
Always great to hear from you! How did the job situation go? As stated earlier by someone, I also firmly believe that these things happen for a reason. And sometimes we have to rise above them to become better ourselves.
I think, no matter what you choose with respect to the career, it will be the right decision for you.
Please keep us updated!! I'm itching to know
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Out of my mind
Posts: 113
Wow,
I wish I was as articulate and insightful as all of you!
I have 2 more new interviews this week and a second for the "Budweiser" job.
It's in my interview skills and God's hands, I suppose.
I will definitely let you all know.
Your responses are so well thought out!
At 41 days sober, I can still barely put my thoughts together in an other than random fashion!
Kinda scary...hope it gets better.
Thank You all for your kindness and your time.
I'm going to go back and re-read them all now.
Dee
I wish I was as articulate and insightful as all of you!
I have 2 more new interviews this week and a second for the "Budweiser" job.
It's in my interview skills and God's hands, I suppose.
I will definitely let you all know.
Your responses are so well thought out!
At 41 days sober, I can still barely put my thoughts together in an other than random fashion!
Kinda scary...hope it gets better.
Thank You all for your kindness and your time.
I'm going to go back and re-read them all now.
Dee
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