I found you YESTERDAY!! Check it out ...
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Join Date: Dec 2007
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I found you YESTERDAY!! Check it out ...
For the past few months I've been dying for a drink ... a whiskey, a tequila, rum ... I know it has something to do with going off painkillers, after a lengthy term of usage for a crushed foot, and missing the numbness and relaxation they brought.
The past few weeks, dealing with putting my mom into a nursing home has been just awful, as far as the temptation to drink. My brother made it worse ... I thought I would ask him how his "meetings" were going, he's been in AA forever, and he told me he talked to his sponsors, and decided he would give drinking another shot. He said when he got into trouble with alcohol he was young and stupid, without any discipline, and he has learned his lesson, and now can just enjoy a few drinks. (okay, he did go out EVERY night, walking to a bar near my mom's apartment ... granted, it has been SUCH a stressful time for us both ... he sheared off a huge piece of tooth just from clenching his teeth!! My mom is ... so hard to cope with!!)
So ... yesterday my 21-year-old daughter and I went to mom's apartment to do some final cleaning. On the way back I told her about my struggle, and how I wanted a drink, like her uncle, maybe I could handle it now ... but what if I were WRONG? She agreed that would be BAD if I were wrong, and found out that I could NOT stay in control. Anyway, we get home, and I Googled "starting to drink after sobriety" and found this website. Your stories are so familiar to me ... thinking about handling alcohol again, and after having initial success, started having more and more and then ... you know the rest. Sigh.
So ... I found the of sobriety calculator. I put in the date of my last drink ... September 25, 1989 ... and do you know how many days I had been sober as of last night? 6666. Is that an answer or WHAT?? I guess I'll be staying sober a day at a time. =D
The past few weeks, dealing with putting my mom into a nursing home has been just awful, as far as the temptation to drink. My brother made it worse ... I thought I would ask him how his "meetings" were going, he's been in AA forever, and he told me he talked to his sponsors, and decided he would give drinking another shot. He said when he got into trouble with alcohol he was young and stupid, without any discipline, and he has learned his lesson, and now can just enjoy a few drinks. (okay, he did go out EVERY night, walking to a bar near my mom's apartment ... granted, it has been SUCH a stressful time for us both ... he sheared off a huge piece of tooth just from clenching his teeth!! My mom is ... so hard to cope with!!)
So ... yesterday my 21-year-old daughter and I went to mom's apartment to do some final cleaning. On the way back I told her about my struggle, and how I wanted a drink, like her uncle, maybe I could handle it now ... but what if I were WRONG? She agreed that would be BAD if I were wrong, and found out that I could NOT stay in control. Anyway, we get home, and I Googled "starting to drink after sobriety" and found this website. Your stories are so familiar to me ... thinking about handling alcohol again, and after having initial success, started having more and more and then ... you know the rest. Sigh.
So ... I found the of sobriety calculator. I put in the date of my last drink ... September 25, 1989 ... and do you know how many days I had been sober as of last night? 6666. Is that an answer or WHAT?? I guess I'll be staying sober a day at a time. =D
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: in the present moment
Posts: 2,060
Dry Lee,
Thank goodness you found us! We are happy to have you here with us, sharing our experiences, strenghts and hopes.
I am inspired by the honesty you have allowed to come through, and that you have the wisdom to know you need to keep sharing these ideas when they come into your head.
One Day At A Time, don't drink, and maybe a meeting??
Thank goodness you found us! We are happy to have you here with us, sharing our experiences, strenghts and hopes.
I am inspired by the honesty you have allowed to come through, and that you have the wisdom to know you need to keep sharing these ideas when they come into your head.
One Day At A Time, don't drink, and maybe a meeting??
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Southern New Hampshire
Posts: 746
untreated alcoholism
[QUOTE=DryLee;1615980]For the past few months I've been dying for a drink ... a whiskey, a tequila, rum ... I know it has something to do with going off painkillers, after a lengthy term of usage for a crushed foot, and missing the numbness and relaxation they brought.
The past few weeks, dealing with putting my mom into a nursing home has been just awful, as far as the temptation to drink. My brother made it worse ...
Welcome DryLee,
In reading your post my heart goes out to you, it troubles me greatly that after almost 18 years separated from alcohol, the drink is still tempting you. The notion that external events are causing this obsession may just be an illusion, a veiled reference to something much deeper and always fatal.
If you are an alcoholic like me, you are suffering from a spiritual maladay. The good news is the solution will change you on a cellular level. You will not think about drinking, the problem will be removed. I would very much like to support you as would the other members of the SR community. In order to do this, some more information would be helpful. How did you get sober in 1989?
What happens when you drink? can you stop or control it? What goes on in your head before you take the first drink? This information is crucial in helping you find your truth. Feel free to PM me, I only wish to be helpful.
The past few weeks, dealing with putting my mom into a nursing home has been just awful, as far as the temptation to drink. My brother made it worse ...
Welcome DryLee,
In reading your post my heart goes out to you, it troubles me greatly that after almost 18 years separated from alcohol, the drink is still tempting you. The notion that external events are causing this obsession may just be an illusion, a veiled reference to something much deeper and always fatal.
If you are an alcoholic like me, you are suffering from a spiritual maladay. The good news is the solution will change you on a cellular level. You will not think about drinking, the problem will be removed. I would very much like to support you as would the other members of the SR community. In order to do this, some more information would be helpful. How did you get sober in 1989?
What happens when you drink? can you stop or control it? What goes on in your head before you take the first drink? This information is crucial in helping you find your truth. Feel free to PM me, I only wish to be helpful.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Yes...it has been a difficult time for you..
Dealing with your Mom's infirmaties plus
your brothers relapse and your injured foot.
Congratulations on continuing your sobriety.
I too got sober in '89 and many
life situations have been a struggle.
After I finished my formal AA Step work
God did remove my obcession to drink.
What helpss me immensley is prayer
and iincreasing my AA service work.
Please keep us updated....Blessings
Dealing with your Mom's infirmaties plus
your brothers relapse and your injured foot.
Congratulations on continuing your sobriety.
I too got sober in '89 and many
life situations have been a struggle.
After I finished my formal AA Step work
God did remove my obcession to drink.
What helpss me immensley is prayer
and iincreasing my AA service work.
Please keep us updated....Blessings
1 bite&all resistance crumbles
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: IRELAND
Posts: 2,208
Welcome Lee!!! I hope you'll throw yourself into your program of recovery whatever it is (AA works for me!) stepwork and prayer has miraculously removed my obsession with alcohol - one day at a time. This is your disease talking and it's totally natural to starting thinking insanely again - and for me what said it all was your uncle going to the pub EVERY night lol stressful situation or not that is so typically alcoholic and I hope he does not have to fall too hard...however, it's a lesson for the rest of us. Wishing you well - I hope you'll read and read and relate and relate and post to your heart;s content - hang in there! look at that sobriety date! Well done, keep going. The power of prayer is amazing and I shall pray for you and your mother and your uncle now.
cathy31
x
Well done, keep going. The power of prayer is amazing and I shall pray for you and your mother and your uncle now.cathy31
x
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Welcome to SR DryLee, good job on not having that drink, it was very hard for me to figure out that it was the first drink that got me drunk and not the 10th or 20th, I am an alcoholic and for me one drink is to many and 1,000 is not enough.
A lot of times an alcoholic who is in recovery when coming off of pain meds will feel that old obsession to drink return because the pain killers although needed were feeding things in them that alcohol used to fill, as a result many times the obsession returns. Best thing I know to do is to get right back into the program that got you sober in the first place.
If you are like me, when I was drinking alcohol was my solution to everything, so coming off the pain killers combined with what is up with your mom and brother adds up to a possible relapse, getting back into what got and kept you sober all these years so far will make a big difference.
Hang around here as well and share with us your ESH.
A lot of times an alcoholic who is in recovery when coming off of pain meds will feel that old obsession to drink return because the pain killers although needed were feeding things in them that alcohol used to fill, as a result many times the obsession returns. Best thing I know to do is to get right back into the program that got you sober in the first place.
If you are like me, when I was drinking alcohol was my solution to everything, so coming off the pain killers combined with what is up with your mom and brother adds up to a possible relapse, getting back into what got and kept you sober all these years so far will make a big difference.
Hang around here as well and share with us your ESH.
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