Feeling pressured
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Berea,Ohio
Posts: 397
There is no reason you cannot take your son.My daughter went when she was younger than eight.Kids are part of life, we cannot always do things as we wish, but your recovery comes first.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Out of my mind
Posts: 113
It was awesome!!!!!
Just got back!! :*****
OMG, OMG it went so well. Better than my diseased mind pictured over and over again before I got there!!!! LOL.
I pulled into the lot and was very unsure if it was the place so I asked 2 women that just pulled up whether it was #7171..one said "I'm not sure, but this is the AA meeting if you're looking for THAT" I laughed and said I was.
They waited while I parked the car and when I told them it was only my second meeting, they scooped me up and introduced me to EVERYONE! There were about 25 people in a cramped kitchen and I started to feel a little awkward, but as soon as the meeting started I felt like I was right where I belonged. It was the kitchen of a church, so Sean (my son) sat in the sanctuary and played his game. At one point he got a little restless and one of the women went out and was talking to him for a bit..then awhile later when they were passing the candy around, some guy brought the bowl out to him so he could have some.
The same 2 women that scooped me up and were my angels shared that weren't even going to come to the meeting that nite out of laziness but something made them go!
They passed around the meeting list and every woman in the room wrote down their phone # and a little note like "don't worry Dee, you're not alone anymore". I'm so overwhelmed in a GOOD way. I've never ever felt so much love.
Sean behaved like a perfect little gentleman even tho I could see he was getting bored. Next time we'll hit blockbuster and he can bring his DVD player.
A few of the people attend a meeting tomorrow at 2PM right near my house so I'm definitely going.
One man shared that he lost his 2 kids this past Saturday (didn't explain how of course) and if it weren't for the program he probably would have already put a bullet in his head. Here I am worried about getting sober. I never ever thought about how the program could help you get through times like THAT!!!!
Thank you all my SR friends for the push I needed. Sean was the only kid there, but when I tried to explain, one woman said "You don't need to explain".
I hope this is the beginning of a brand new life for me and Sean.
Denise
OMG, OMG it went so well. Better than my diseased mind pictured over and over again before I got there!!!! LOL.
I pulled into the lot and was very unsure if it was the place so I asked 2 women that just pulled up whether it was #7171..one said "I'm not sure, but this is the AA meeting if you're looking for THAT" I laughed and said I was.
They waited while I parked the car and when I told them it was only my second meeting, they scooped me up and introduced me to EVERYONE! There were about 25 people in a cramped kitchen and I started to feel a little awkward, but as soon as the meeting started I felt like I was right where I belonged. It was the kitchen of a church, so Sean (my son) sat in the sanctuary and played his game. At one point he got a little restless and one of the women went out and was talking to him for a bit..then awhile later when they were passing the candy around, some guy brought the bowl out to him so he could have some.
The same 2 women that scooped me up and were my angels shared that weren't even going to come to the meeting that nite out of laziness but something made them go!
They passed around the meeting list and every woman in the room wrote down their phone # and a little note like "don't worry Dee, you're not alone anymore". I'm so overwhelmed in a GOOD way. I've never ever felt so much love.
Sean behaved like a perfect little gentleman even tho I could see he was getting bored. Next time we'll hit blockbuster and he can bring his DVD player.
A few of the people attend a meeting tomorrow at 2PM right near my house so I'm definitely going.
One man shared that he lost his 2 kids this past Saturday (didn't explain how of course) and if it weren't for the program he probably would have already put a bullet in his head. Here I am worried about getting sober. I never ever thought about how the program could help you get through times like THAT!!!!
Thank you all my SR friends for the push I needed. Sean was the only kid there, but when I tried to explain, one woman said "You don't need to explain".
I hope this is the beginning of a brand new life for me and Sean.
Denise
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 477
((((((Dee)))))))))
I'm not an A and I can usually be found on the Friends board but I read here a lot to learn more about the disease and your story, along with Krissy's, have really touched me deeply since you've been here. Maybe it's because I'm a mother too and I can understand how difficult it must be to make time for yourself right now in order to achieve the best possible results for you.
I am so glad that you discovered that bringing your son, Sean, to the meeting was not a problem for anybody there. I used to always want to do the "right thing" and not upset anybody's apple cart particularly where my children were concerned. That's all part of my co-dependent baggage, I guess. I always thought that people had to offer and that I was not allowed to ask for anything. I am discovering, however, that it is more than OK to ask and that anything people choose to give us as a result of our asking is just as good as if they had offered without being asked. So, it's wonderful that you discovered that Sean can accompany you to meetings! And even better, it sounds like you are on your way to making real friends.
Dee, I'm rooting for you from across the miles!
Stay strong and give Sean an extra hug!
ARL
I'm not an A and I can usually be found on the Friends board but I read here a lot to learn more about the disease and your story, along with Krissy's, have really touched me deeply since you've been here. Maybe it's because I'm a mother too and I can understand how difficult it must be to make time for yourself right now in order to achieve the best possible results for you.
I am so glad that you discovered that bringing your son, Sean, to the meeting was not a problem for anybody there. I used to always want to do the "right thing" and not upset anybody's apple cart particularly where my children were concerned. That's all part of my co-dependent baggage, I guess. I always thought that people had to offer and that I was not allowed to ask for anything. I am discovering, however, that it is more than OK to ask and that anything people choose to give us as a result of our asking is just as good as if they had offered without being asked. So, it's wonderful that you discovered that Sean can accompany you to meetings! And even better, it sounds like you are on your way to making real friends.
Dee, I'm rooting for you from across the miles!
Stay strong and give Sean an extra hug!
ARL
Life the gift of recovery!
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Home is where the heart is
Posts: 7,061
Originally Posted by Dee_Sober4today 
Just got back!! :*****
OMG, OMG it went so well. Better than my diseased mind pictured over and over again before I got there!!!! LOL.
OMG, OMG it went so well. Better than my diseased mind pictured over and over again before I got there!!!! LOL.
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Dee you really uplifted my day as I read this thread at first I was down, then you brought me right back up.... even a tear!!!
Since I have been in AA I have seen both mothers and fathers bring children into the rooms, into both open & closed meetings, I have never heard a single word said against it, I have heard a lot of good things said though.
In order to get and stay sober we must be willing to do what ever it takes to stay sober, by the same token we must be willing to go that extra mile to help others get and stay sober!!!!
Trust me when I say a child would much rather spend some time in an AA meeting with a sober parent then spend "Quality" time at home with a drunk parent!!!!
I have played pass the baby in meetings before and I loved it!!!!
If one is taking care of or entertaining some ones child to where the parent can participate in an AA meeting that is considered 12th step work in my book.
Since I have been in AA I have seen both mothers and fathers bring children into the rooms, into both open & closed meetings, I have never heard a single word said against it, I have heard a lot of good things said though.
In order to get and stay sober we must be willing to do what ever it takes to stay sober, by the same token we must be willing to go that extra mile to help others get and stay sober!!!!
Trust me when I say a child would much rather spend some time in an AA meeting with a sober parent then spend "Quality" time at home with a drunk parent!!!!
I have played pass the baby in meetings before and I loved it!!!!
If one is taking care of or entertaining some ones child to where the parent can participate in an AA meeting that is considered 12th step work in my book.
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Keep coming back (I feel weird saying that, like I am not "qualified" to yet, but it really helps me to hear it!).
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Out of my mind
Posts: 113
Insanity
Boy old habits die HARD as they say.
I have to go to a recruiter (job) at 12:30 today and as soon as I woke up, my mind started thinking of every excuse I could use to NOT go.
It was so cozy in my bed I was thinking I would keep my son home and sleep in becasue I'm 7 days today and I really deserve it, or I would just take him in late. Wait, I'll call the recruiter and tell him my son was sick and I had to reschedule. Wait, I have an interview with another, bigger recruiter tomorrow, so I'll just go to THAT one. 'Just turn the alarm off and roll over' my disease was telling me.
Dear GOD! Insanity. I hate this disease
I have to go to a recruiter (job) at 12:30 today and as soon as I woke up, my mind started thinking of every excuse I could use to NOT go.
It was so cozy in my bed I was thinking I would keep my son home and sleep in becasue I'm 7 days today and I really deserve it, or I would just take him in late. Wait, I'll call the recruiter and tell him my son was sick and I had to reschedule. Wait, I have an interview with another, bigger recruiter tomorrow, so I'll just go to THAT one. 'Just turn the alarm off and roll over' my disease was telling me.
Dear GOD! Insanity. I hate this disease
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Dee keep in mind that the most important thing to do to get and stay sober is to change!!!
We have to change, there is an old saying ion the rooms "Change we must, or die we will!".
You know what you really need to do, do not let your disease take back over, do what you need to do, these feelings you are having are King Alcohol trying to convince you that the battle is over, you can rest on your laurels, next thing it may be telling you is that you deserve a drink since you have gone 7 days! It will start to tell you "You can't be an alcoholic, you went 7 days with out a drink, one can't hurt!"
Hon I have been where you are at, the beast talks to us, it lies to us all the time, push it aside and get on with life on lifes terms, not alcohols terms!
You are doing great, keep doing what you are doing, the better you are able to tell when the beast is speaking to you, the easier it will be to push the beast aside.
We have to change, there is an old saying ion the rooms "Change we must, or die we will!".
You know what you really need to do, do not let your disease take back over, do what you need to do, these feelings you are having are King Alcohol trying to convince you that the battle is over, you can rest on your laurels, next thing it may be telling you is that you deserve a drink since you have gone 7 days! It will start to tell you "You can't be an alcoholic, you went 7 days with out a drink, one can't hurt!"
Hon I have been where you are at, the beast talks to us, it lies to us all the time, push it aside and get on with life on lifes terms, not alcohols terms!
You are doing great, keep doing what you are doing, the better you are able to tell when the beast is speaking to you, the easier it will be to push the beast aside.
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