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I feel lonely

Old 09-27-2007, 12:19 PM
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I feel lonely

I don’t have many friends in this country and I feel so depressed I need sometimes to drink and be happy
My husband does not care about me and I don’t care about him either
He calls me a drunk and insults me and does not respect me like I should be respect.
I don’t drink so much like other people do, but sometimes I lose my control
I started with this physiatrist and therapist, the therapist is saying as I’m taking ambient it makes more drunk and addicted to alcohol, when I visit my physiatrist next week I have tell him about campral or the other pills to help against cravings.
Did somebody went thru the same as me, I will like some help and advise
Thanks
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Old 09-27-2007, 12:23 PM
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No more merlot, more mamma
 
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My exH called me a drunk so many times it ceased to affect me...until I finally agreed with him. We aren't married any longer, but get along (for the most part) better now than we ever have. He's very proud of my recovery, and lets me know that.

You know why? Cause once I found sobriety I found respect for myself, therefore I find that I am treated with respect from other people.

It's good that you are talking with your doctors. They can help!

Karen
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Old 09-27-2007, 12:26 PM
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Thanks karen for your respond.
My husband did not respect me from day 1, thats why my drinking thing and depression
I hope to get help and be sober with control like i was
thanks so much !
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Old 09-27-2007, 12:30 PM
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No more merlot, more mamma
 
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If you want it badly enough, it'll happen.
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Old 09-27-2007, 12:37 PM
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I think it is a great idea to be reaching out for help. Alcohol is a depressant and for more than a few deadly. Please don't mix pills and alcohol. When you get sober you will have the strength to fix your other problems, you must do that FIRST! You are worth it...don't forget it!
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Old 09-27-2007, 12:45 PM
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thanks again
you replays mean a lot for me !!!!
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Old 09-27-2007, 02:24 PM
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Hi Marl...
My long term depression is why I started AA recovery.
The supportive new friends I met there are awesome.

Take care of yoursself drinking is never the answer.
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Old 09-28-2007, 08:48 AM
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thanks,
but if im drepressed and go to AA i will still be depress?
or a need other caind of help?
thanks girls for you replays
you such lovely people
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Old 09-28-2007, 09:06 AM
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You pose a good question
Originally Posted by Mar13 View Post
.....but if im drepressed and go to AA i will still be depress?
or a need other caind of help?
I have some experience with depression. I have fought with it for years both in and out of sobriety. One thing I have learned is that for me my depression is a chemical imbalance for the most part and at times a little situational.

The 12 Steps helped immensely and continue to help with the situational depression. But for the chemical depression I had to seek outside help.

I don't know if the chemical depression is a side effect of the damage I did to my brain while drinking or not but the fact of the matter is regardless of why I have it I have to deal with it. I will probably have to take medication for the rest of my life. But the alternative is not acceptable to me. When my depression is bad I get suicidal. I have been so blessed in sobriety that I would not want to throw that away simply because I wouldn't treat the medical condition of depression.

I hope you find what works for you. I would recommend seeing your physician and being as honest as possible regarding this matter. I personally, make a list of the things I need to tell my Dr. before I go to the appointment as I tend to downplay or forget essential things.
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Old 09-28-2007, 10:11 AM
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thanks ! i just find out about the thanks botton lol !
is the AA in churchs? im not a religious person
even my daughther goes to catholic school i dont like going to church
so if i have to pray i will prefer not to
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Old 09-28-2007, 02:05 PM
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Originally Posted by Mar13 View Post
im not a religious person even my daughther goes to catholic school i dont like going to church so
No A.A. is not a religious organization. It is just a group of alcoholics trying to stay sober. There is a spiritual aspect associated with the Steps but refers to a Higher Power of our understanding. For example, electricity is stonger than me so I could consider that a Higher Power but someone else might see the Catholic God as their Higher Power. It is a personal thing rather than a group thing as far as that goes.

is the AA in churchs?
It is held in churches sometimes as that is a place that the A.A. group rents for that meeting. But it is just as easily held in community centers, nursing homes, etc..... I am glad it is as if church were a requirement then I would likely be still drinking or dead. My church experiences have not been positive.

if i have to pray i will prefer not to
As far as praying that is a personal choice also. It works for some. I know people that get on their knees every morning and night and pray a formal prayer. I also know some that never pray at all. What works for one as far as prayer goes may or may not work for another that is why it is something you would have to decide what works for you.

Hope that helps answer some of your questions.
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Old 09-29-2007, 07:45 AM
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Hey Mar, there are many alternatives to AA. I do however reccomend if you've never tried it to at least give it a chance, It wasn't for me but I did give it a whirl.
I decided to seek help with a therapist and I also attend group therapy sessions for the f2f experience. I also am doing behavioral group therapy as well which has been great. I had problems with depression and manic depression LONG before I put any drink or drug into me so I know for a fact my brain chemistry is ABNORMAL, the booze and pills made everything worse.
Before getting hooked up with a therapist my doctor wanted me to taper off the pills and setup a 2 week taper schedule, so I had no DT's really. I was popping a lot of valium, ambien (I have always had sleep problems)
and I was drinking with them. Whenever I tried to stop on my own the depression was immense and the anxiety would send me to the roof.
Call your doctor and be honest with him about everything, I've got almost 8 months under my belt but it was being honest with my doctor first that opened the correct door for me.
Also I have a few friends in my group therapy that do both therapy and AA
Our group is mostly for those with substance/alcohol problems who were self-medicating due to underlying mental health issues but a good therapist/doctor will fit you in with the right group for you. Typically you should be drug/alcohol free for at least 6 months for an accurate diagnosis, unless you have had the depression before you started drinking?
DO talk to your doctor.
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Old 09-29-2007, 11:56 AM
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oh thanks so much !
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Old 09-29-2007, 12:23 PM
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Originally Posted by Mar13 View Post
I don’t have many friends in this country and I feel so depressed I need sometimes to drink and be happy
My husband does not care about me and I don’t care about him either
He calls me a drunk and insults me and does not respect me like I should be respect.
I don’t drink so much like other people do, but sometimes I lose my control
I started with this physiatrist and therapist, the therapist is saying as I’m taking ambient it makes more drunk and addicted to alcohol, when I visit my physiatrist next week I have tell him about campral or the other pills to help against cravings.
Did somebody went thru the same as me, I will like some help and advise
Thanks
drinking aside, why did you marry someone who didn't respect you from day 1?
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Old 09-29-2007, 01:06 PM
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Hi is a good and will never like shout at me but he does not respect me in other ways
Like not understanding me and being selfish
That is not respecting me
His a good man and not aggressive at all
But I feel I’m not respect in some ways like when whey have an argument and the 1st thing he does calls me drunk
And that hurts me a lot.
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Old 09-29-2007, 01:21 PM
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I had no husband when I slid into alcoholism
and still do not in sobriety.
Sooo...I can not relate to that.

The reason I suggested AA is my depression turned
out to be situational. Once I stopped drinking for 3
months...it did vanish.
And...
you can make new women friends in AA meetings
to help with your feelings of sadness and lonliness.
My AA friends are so very kind and understanding.

Just go and listen. What can it hurt?
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Old 09-29-2007, 01:27 PM
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Originally Posted by Mar13 View Post
Hi is a good and will never like shout at me but he does not respect me in other ways
Like not understanding me and being selfish
That is not respecting me
His a good man and not aggressive at all
But I feel I’m not respect in some ways like when whey have an argument and the 1st thing he does calls me drunk
And that hurts me a lot.
oh i have experience with that too. if it's a bad argument my husband will go for the throat and say the meanest things that he knows will hurt me the most. but luckily that's only during arguments, most of the time he's loving and caring.
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Old 09-29-2007, 01:27 PM
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thanks, i should have a look in my area for one.
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