can anyone relate?
 

New to forum...I have been reading some of the posts but everyone seems alot younger with only a few "drinking years". Is there anyone on this forum in their late 40's with 15+ years of alcoholism? I am an active drinker, would love to not be, and really need someone I can relate to for support...........

Hi drunkentexas, welcome to the forums.

I am 44. Drank for nearly twenty years. AA helped me to get sober and stay sober and it was a great place to find others whom I could relate to.

just a thought!!! its not about comparing the age, its about relating to the feelings, experiences, and so on! even tho i am not in my forties i can still relate to the emotions that a 40 something may be feeling when it relates to alcohol!!

just a thought you can take it or leave it!!

good luck!!

L

I can relate.

I was powerless over alcohol, and my life was unmanageable.

When you can admit that, the only thing you need to have in common, is a desire to stop drinking.


Simply put.



Tom

I am a 40 some odd y/o sober person. It took me till I was 41 to wake up. Today I am 550 days sober and glad for it. Some days are tough, but not because of craving alcohol, because I am just now starting to learn how to live as a whole person. My experiences that got me sober were not as unique as I thought. When I became active in AA I discovered that the people in there are just like me! I fit in. Listen and share.

sorry, didn't mean that i cant relate to anyone under 40...i just have ALOT of health problems from so many years of drinking and only someone my age group would probably be in the same boat...

Drunkntexas,

I'm glad you're here, and looking for support. My name is Rowan, and I'm a recovering alkie and benzo addict. Keep reading and posting, you've found a great site with wonderful members.

p.s. there is a sticky up at the top which has excerpts from a book called "Under the Influence" - it's great reading, and has a lot of information about alcoholism and beyond.

Rowan

Hey Tex,
My name is Mike and I'm a drunk from Boston. I'm 47, haven't had a drink since January 19, 1996, but was pretty much hammered for most of the 20 years before that. As for health problems: I'm asthmatic, diabetic, used to suffer from gout, wear glasses, creak in every part of my body, but actually feel great! I'm also a new dad to Sheila aged 3 and Liam 10 months. That part of me still works - or did as of nineteen months ago anyway.
If that qualifies me then that's great. As for those other young whippersnappers - I've said this before - we must have spilled more booze than they ever drank. I'll bet I could wring out some old ties that have more likker in 'em than they drank! Hah!!
Just kidding. To be honest, much of the wisdom I get from this site is from those much younger than myself. As has been said - we're all drunks trying to get or stay well. Please keep posting, feel free to e-mail me at any time, and believe in yourself! Good to see your posts and I hope to see more.
Mike in Boston - Go Sox (Red that is)!!

I am 42, spent 20 years drinking. Came into the program of AA at the age of 35 and so far it has worked for me. I am fairly new to this forum myself but have found there is a lot of great support and some very solid recovery here. Glad to see your post. Hope you find what you are looking for.

thanx for the welcome
 

thanks mike and rowan, i have read the book but was already aware of the effects of alcohol since i am a nurse. i live in a town of 50,000 and i have a high profile job that makes it impossible for me to attend AA meetings... i have NEVER drank while working but evenings and weekends are another story!! Literally everyone i know drinks...friends, family..it's Texas and that's what we do...only I do it everyday and the rest know when to stop. i am afraid to quit drinking on my own (dt's) and i cant go to any local MD's as they all know me. the closest large city is 2 hrs away and that is just not feasible...if you have any ideas to help me please let me know...i am divorced and putting 2 daughters thru college so i have no money for rehab and do not want to use insurance from my employer............HELP

Hi Tex,
47 years old and I'd say 10+ years living in a drunken stupor. New (very new) to sobriety. Have tried several times the last few months and am trying again now as we speak. What I find here that up untill now hadn't had is the encouragement to REALLY keep trying. That while I may not get it right away....if I stay with it I will!! I do a lot of reading here (not a whole lot of posting) and am so thank-full for the great people at SR. Welcome, glad to have ya!

Have you called AA? There may be meetings for professionals in your area. Where I live, there are meetings for police, judges, attorneys, doctors, detox workers, etc. I would call your local AA office and make some inquiries.

A lady I know works at our local detox centre, so she usually goes to out-of-town meetings. Is that a consideration for you?

I hope this helps, some.

Drunkintexas,
I am also a nurse/paramedic. I can relate to your small town concerns as I lived in a town of 35,000 prior to getting sober. I too did not drink while at work but did drink most anytime I was not at work. Usually started on my way home.
I do know that you are concerned about going to AA since your professional career is important to you. Please realize though that there are plenty of professional people in AA. I am actually amazed at how many people in the medical profession wind up in AA. One of the principles of AA is anomynity. Many people in AA do not advertise they are in it and prefer to remain anonymous. When I run into someone I have met in a meeting I just say hello but do not bring up AA if we are in public. That is the way most people handle it. I have even found that I am no longer afraid of my employer finding out I am a recovering alcoholic. When I was actively drinking I was always worried they might find out about it. AA has worked for me and probably in the long run saved my career as I have no idea how long it would have been before I would justify having a drink before or during work. If you do want to try a doctor just make it clear that you do not want rumors spread about you and expect him to keep your medical history private as it should be anyway. With the HIPPA laws no matter what you see the doctor for it should never be an issue of concern that it will get out. I wish you the best and hope you find the answers you are seeking. There is hope. From my experience I would not trade my worst day sober for my best day drunk. Take care.

Hi Tex,
I have a fairly high profile job myself and attend AA, but have to be careful what meetings I go to. However, I also live in the city where it is much easier to be anonymous. Do you belong to a union or nurses association? They might have some suggestions for you. Sober recovery is a great tool, but you might need some kind of face to face options.
I can relate to the everyone drinks thing. I live in the Allston-Brighton section of Boston - more bars per capita than almost anywhere - and I'm an old school Boston Irish kind of guy. I meet people and they say, "You're Irish, from Boston, and don't drink?" Then they kind of put it all together and I don't have to say anything.
This post probably isn't helping much, but others may have better suggestions. There are literally thousands here- -someone is bound to have an answer. For now - don't drink, try a meeting if you can (you'll be surprised at how discreet AAers can be) and keep trying. Good luck and hope to see more posts.
Mike

yall all have good ideas and as some have said i'm just finding excuses to continue drinking...i am very miserable with myself...i find that i dont even want to socialize with friends...i just come home and entertain myself with my vodka...thanks for all the replies, i'm off to bed now.........

Hope you decide to stick around. We'll be here to listen and support you as best we can. :hug:

Hi, You're not alone there, I'm 47 well, closer to 48....with 30 years actively drinking as much as possible, daily.

In a couple of days it will be 10 months without a drink or a drug...1 day at a time. :)

I'm your age, tx ... I'm just immature

I'm 45 and have a 25 year drinking history. I have 6 months sober now.

As far as so many younger people here and in the rooms of AA, I blame drugs. Almost everyone new has abused multiple drugs, not just alcohol. Don't get me wrong, I don't think abusing any other drug is somehow "worse" than alcohol, or that the people that do it are any worse, but I do believe abusing multiple substances will get you into rehab/AA/NA faster.