It's a miracle.
Ms. Heidi
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Bristol,Connecticut
Posts: 15
It's a miracle.
I haven't been here for a while but, I'm back with good news. I have not drank for 5 days. The struggle just to get to this point for me was extremely difficult it was like every time I would take 2 steps forward I'd take 5 back. I'm sure a lot of you out there feel that same way and it's just an overwhelming feeling of being defeated each time. Believe me I'd let my self know it too. I spent so much time beating myself up for all of my faults that I had no time to realize how great of a person that I really am. One day just last week I woke with another aching head, turning stomach, and realization that I once again over did it. I looked around at my place and realized that it was a mess, my car was a mess, my LIFE was a mess. I decided wright then and there that it was time to grow up and stop acting like a child about my addiction. The adult in me had enough of the excuses and ridiculous reasons to have a drink. Having a drink was one thing drinking a bottle every two days was something completely different. My biggest fear of quitting was going through the withdrawals. I know how serious they are because I'd been through them before. I knew I couldn't get through this alone. So I turned to the one thing that I've never tried, Prayer. I know that probably sounds crazy to some people but I was never really religious growing up. I just wasn't taught to say prayers or how to say them for that matter. But I did, I prayed to god to forgive me. I asked him not to give up on me even though I had given up on myself already and to give me the strength to get through this. That night I didn't feel like I even wanted to drink and I didn't and I haven't since then. I also cleaned my entire car and I've been doing chores ever since. For any skeptics out there it definitely worked and for all of my days I will say my prayers and continue to thank god for this incredible gift that he gave me again. Real living breathing life.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Prayer is a powerful part of my life.
I also use AA for support and learning.
Please consider that as well.
Glad to see you here and with good news
to share!..
I also use AA for support and learning.
Please consider that as well.
Glad to see you here and with good news
to share!..
Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Cumming, Ga
Posts: 665
Gwen, welcome back!!!! I didn't see anything crazy in your post. When I put down the drink again I had been back out there for awhile. I recalled prayer being helpful when I was in recovery before, so that's what I turned to. I asked God to get me through the first day. Those first couple of weeks and even months were very difficult. I dared not go back to AA. I just couldn't face it. I felt like such a loser and I was angry. When I came back into the program, I prayed again, " God, help me find a meeting" And I was led home. Prayer is a daily thing for me now, and multiple times daily. Some days more prayer than others, but it's the first thing I do in the morning, and the last thing I do at night. You're right, it really does work. Glad you're here.
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
So I turned to the one thing that I've never tried, Prayer. I know that probably sounds crazy to some people but I was never really religious growing up.
I was to sit quietly when in doubt, asking only for direction and strength to meet my problems as He would have me. Never was I to pray for myself, except as my requests bore on my usefulness to others.
The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences* which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God's universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves.
We were in a position where life was becoming impossible, and if we had passed into the region from which there is no return through human aid, we had but two alternatives: One was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best we could; and the other, to accept spiritual help.
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
In AA I have found that in order to get and stay sober and happy I had to get spiritual, not religous, but spiritual or I would drink again and die. The reasons that the steps of AA have led to me being sober, happy, joyous, and free, is because I have been released from my guilt, shame, and fears, I strive daily to live as spiritually as I can, prayer and meditation is a huge part of this, my Higher Power whom I choose to call God gives me a daily reprieve from my alcoholism as long as I maintian my spiritual condition.
Congrats on your 5th day, keep in mind that if the only thing you change about your self is not drinking and you are like me, a true alcoholic, I have found that I used to quit all the time, I even quit for 1 1/2 years about 30 years ago, but I changed nothing about myself and I drank again.
I have found that in order to stay sober I have had to change myself, because the old me was a drunk the way I was, whether I was drinking or not.
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