raerae6

Hi, I went out with a friend last night to celebrate her birthday and I got drunk. Ever since I was 16, I have been a binge drinker. There have been times in my life when I drank every week or few days and for the last 15 years or so, I binge drink every 3 months or every month, it varies.

Lately I have noticed that when I do binge, I feel worse than usual after...very depressed. I think that is part of why I've been binging more lately, cause I've been depressed and stressed. I have been broke and I can't afford to be drinking, it's an unessesary expense in my life.

I am the type who will stop at 2 drinks sometimes, but often when I do start, I feel good and then I drink faster until I'm officially drunk.

I guess I'm at the point where I have to admit that I cannot control how much I drink. I have decided to stop altogether. Many of my friends drink and I associate it with "having a good time" .

I feel wierd posting this because I usually post on 'friends and family of substance abusers' cause I'm codependent and I had a relationship with a crack user.
Alcohol has always been my drug of choice, i don't do any others-have in the past, but not in some time.

i feel like some kind of hypocrite now cause I am realizing that I have a problem as well....maybe i don't do the things that my ex-addict bf did because of crack, but I guess I'm an addict, too?

I just wanted to post this because I want to stop drinking today! I don't want to be hungover ever again!! i just wanted to make this commitment right now where someone will see it and i think that may help me stick to it.

This is day one!!!!

stone

Hi raerea, welcome to the other side!

You might not be addicted but if you cant control it when you begin you could well have a problem and if so it will almost definitley get worse.

Congratulations on your decision to quit!

Lizrox

Good for you and I wish you much luck!!!

Love,

Liz

Peter

Anybody can make a decision. Just be sure to back up the decision with action.

raerae6

I have made this decision a few times lately, and messed up after...

Live

hugs, Raerae!

Peter

When I got sober I had to get into action. For me it was AA meetings. Lots and lots of 'em. I signed up for service work; getting there early and setting up chairs, making coffee. Later I did H&I work. I did sponsorship duty.

Stopping is easy. The real challenge is to find a way to want to STAY STOPPED.

Outside of AA I also did a lot of reading. Never had a computer in those days but I got my hand on every piece of addiction and recovery related material I could find. I was ravenous for information.I spoke to addicts on the streets.Read spiritual stuff and I picked up the bible again.

I was so darned busy I never had time to think about a drink

I believe I learned so much about addiction I could have become an addiction counsellor (who never disclosed names of other AA members)

Learn as much as you can about addiction and recovery. Work out a strategy for when the cravings hit. Learn to avoid people places and things associated with drinking.Go out of your way to avoid people places and things. Run if you have to Get busy with family and friends. Pick up a healthy hobby.

Think think think.

Help others to find sobriety after you get sober.I know you can do it.

raerae6

I keep so much to myself and hidden, that is my habit in life.

I realise that I just minimized my drinking to a bunch of strangers in cyberspace....I guess that means denial..
I have gone 3 months without.
I have gone one month without.
But more typically it is once a week, or a few times a week sometimes-especially lately.

CarolD

I suggest you read the top sticky here

Welcome to our Alcoholism Forum...

raerae6

Thanks i did and it was very interesting! I will get that book.

BP44

Congratulations on having a desire to stop drinking. Have you considered AA? If so, then my suggestion would be...don't drink and go to a meeting. That's really all you have to do right now. Do this for 90 consecutive days one day at a time. Go to more than one meeting a day if that's what it takes to not drink that day.

GrouchoTheCat

Hi Rae Rae,

Do you have a plan of some sort in place? Maybe get a medical check and be honest with the Doc.

Are you planning on going to AA? If you've been to Alanon you should at least be comfortable with the general format.

Good on ya for wanting to quit!

raerae6

I have been thinking about how i will handle it when someone offers me a beer or drink. I have been thinking about what kinds of feelings and situations trigger me to want to drink. I have never been to al-anon or AA, but i know there are meetings all over near me. I don't know for sure whay I have such a hard time trying to go to a meeting of either kind. maybe shyness...I know that's one of the reasons I have always enjoyed alcohol-it makes me more outgoing.

BP44

I completely understand " I don't know why I don't want to go". For me, AA was the last place I wanted to go in the beginning, and it was the last place I wanted to come back to after I went back out. AA is THE LAST RESORT. We will try everything before that, from trying to figure out what makes us drink the way we do, to changing where we live to changing relationships...anything but going to an AA meeting and admitting that we are beaten and defeated. However, once I climbed into the lifeboat, and surrendered, and admitted complete defeat I had a chance. And I have found that if I keep doing that on a daily basis, I have a chance at another 24 hours of sobriety. You will find new friends. Friends who like you have a desire to stop drinking and are living a sober life. I had to stop trying to figure things out and be WILLING to be shown the way out. Hope this helps.

parentrecovers

lots of nice folks over here, raerae - good for you for reaching out! sending you support and extra prayers, k

in_a_pickle

HI raerae

I've only recently decided to stop drinking (day 5 now) and only yesterday I ended up in a sitiation where I was surrounded by people drinking beer and offering me a drink. Here's my advice on what to do if someone offers you a drink; LIE! Just tell them anything, I said that I'm currently taking anti biotics for a chest infection, but any lie will do, just get the hell away from that drink.

I'm sure further down the line I'll have developed more sophisticated techniques but for the time being I've found that lying really works.

Good luck.

Tazman53

raerae if you want to stop drinking and you are like me (I am an alcoholic) and you find you can not stop drinking even if you want to I know a solution that has worked for me and many others, AA.

Do not worry about the meetings, you do not have to say a word if you do not want to, just go and sit in the back and listen.

Very important, do not focus on the differences between you and the others, focus on similarities!

If you go to a meeting where some one ask you to share simply say "No thank you, I am just listing" which to be honest is the best thing a new comer can do. Once you get a bit more comfortable in meetings if you have a "Topic" you would like to hear discussed in the beginning of the meeting when they ask for a topic simply speak up and mention a topic, the topic can be anything to do with AA and recovery.