Astro

I posted this reading in another thread today-

"Alcoholism is a progressive illness. We go through the three stages of social drinking, trouble drinking, and merry-go-round drinking. We land in hospitals and jails. We eventually lose our homes, our families, and our self-respect. Yes, alcoholism is a progressive illness and there are only three ends to it - the insane asylum, the morgue, or total abstinence. Will I choose not to take the first drink?"

Total abstinence. It's made sense to me since day one of my recovery.

Rowan

Glad you held off another day. Hang on to your sobriety with all you've got.

Dee74

why do you 'want to drink' Chris ? sorry for being presumptuous seeing as we don't know each other, but I'm genuinely interested

D

BP44

Chris, I found that a miserable place to be " wanting to drink, and wanting to not drink" Utter hopelessness. May I suggest writing out a 1st step. Put it on paper. Your original title for this thread was "end of sobriety 6/5/07". Now, let's be honest, how long have you been on this dry drunk? You didn't get in this frame of mind over night. I have found that the insanity creeps back in over time as I get away from this program. When I lie to myself long enough, the lie becomes the truth, and the next thing I know, I'm at the 1st drink....and then I'll tell myself, " it will be different this time". To get out of the dry drunk I was in, I had to get back into the program of AA. IN, not around AA. The only thing that is gonna save me is another alcoholic and God. Here's a thought, Bill Wilson and Lois lived virtually penniless for a number of years while AA was getting off the ground. They had no home of their own, they lived off the charity of others. But Bill knew that the only way to stay sober was to help another alcoholic and to serve others. So, he tirelessly committed himself to doing so. He went through a number of horrible depressions during this time period always to emerge more spiritually intact. He did this by serving others. Going to a meeting and sharing what's going on will help serve another alcoholic. Any kind of service work will help take you out of the pity you are sitting in right now. What are you willing to do to stay sober another 24 hours?

Pilgrim

I am pleased you haven't drunk yet.

You will get drunk if you have one. You say you don't want that.

I think it is ok to imagine a drink. Don't fight it. The old timers in my home group don't. They allow the imagination and then they "hand it over" or something. At some stage when we are drinking we stop. If I had drunk tonight I would have stopped by now and all I would be is comatose with sickness ahead.

My will would see me in a bar. I would not live long so my will is no good. It is flawed. Do you have faith that the will of your HP is better? Then you don't have to worry any more. It works quite well for me that one.

paulmh

I'm glad you're here and not out there.

CDr55

I'm still sober. I guess I posted this thread because ultimately I wanted help and in my heart did not want to drink.

I just woke up and found out that my mom has diabetes. Seriously, it seems that every day gets just a little more dramatic. It's difficult to keep up ones faith at times.

Rowan

Sorry about your mom - an incentive to stay sober, I hope?

Life may seem chaotic, but we don't have to react to it. Just take it day by day, as best you can.

I'm glad you didn't drink.

CarolD

Glad you are hanging on....

I've been a diabetic for 4 years and I assure you
it's a disease easily managed.
You can help her immensley with loving encurgement.

Blessings

Peter

Happy to see you have not picked up a drink.