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Too complacent? I'm going on 36 days today (Friday) and it feels like it's been WAY longer than that. I've been feeling surprisingly good lately. In the last 2 weeks I've only had trouble with cravings twice and those were times where I was so stressed out I didn't know what to do with myself. I'm definitely not complaining about how things are going right now, it's awesome. It just worries me a little that I may be getting a little too complacent. The memories of the bad moments are fading and it's like I have a false sense of confidence or something. Deep down inside I know I still need to avoid being around alcohol at all costs. But... I don't know, I'm having a hard time explaining it. Anybody know what I mean? Any words of advice? :) |
No words of advice. Just glad you're feeling good. I have days when I feel complacent, indignant, serene, ecstatic, self-pitying, morose, giddy, morbid, lazy, confused and colicky..... eh, you get the picture. As long as I don't drink, they're all good days. |
Yes, they definitely are good days. I'm just worried that if I keep going like this I'll have another relapse. But I guess as long as I'm worried, it won't happen. It's when I don't worry about it that I should be scared of. |
It won't happen as long as you don't pick up that first drink. But I have to say Red, I felt e-x-a-c-t-l-y the same way for the first year or so! Sobreity is so precious! I did have genuine fear - what if I lose this? What if I drop the ball like I did all those times in the past? Why do I think this time is going to be any different? "This time" was different though. "This time" I had some tools which could help me - like not picking up that first drink, just for today, and letting tomorrow take care of itself. And accepting what the day gave me, even if I didn't like it. Thanks for your post today Red. You've really helped me to think about how precious my sobriety is. And how grateful I am for it. ODAAT! |
Red I know exactly how you are feeling, what I have found that helps me the most is working with other recovering alcoholics, AA meetings help me not only learn how to live sober and happy, but also it helps me to remember where I was at before I got sober by working with new comers, every time I talk to them I see and hear where I was at 7 months ago. I see that fresh pain in their eyes, the frustration, the desperation. SR helps as well, AA & SR keep fresh in my mind where I was and where I do not want to go back to, they both also bring joy to my life when I hear that voice on the phone of some one who not long ago was miserable as hell now laughing and talking about a meeting they went to the night before, or how much they enjoyed doing things they never did when they were drinking. The biggest thing that keeps me sober and happy is working the steps and going to meetings to learn how to live happy and sober and help others do the same. |
:cheer for your sober time! I wrote down all the misery of my 3 day de tox (they are in our "Quitting" sticky too) and kept them in my purse. I also had AA phone numbers and a card with our AA Promises...steps...Traditions...Serenity Prayer too. When I felt tempted all I had to do is refresh my memory. Blessings |
Originally Posted by RedFox
(Post 1327119)
I'm going on 36 days today (Friday) and it feels like it's been WAY longer than that. I've been feeling surprisingly good lately. In the last 2 weeks I've only had trouble with cravings twice and those were times where I was so stressed out I didn't know what to do with myself. I'm definitely not complaining about how things are going right now, it's awesome. It just worries me a little that I may be getting a little too complacent. The memories of the bad moments are fading and it's like I have a false sense of confidence or something. Deep down inside I know I still need to avoid being around alcohol at all costs. But... I don't know, I'm having a hard time explaining it. Anybody know what I mean? Any words of advice? :) Our brains have the amazing ability to forget pain.Women who give natural birth and daredevil stuntmen are indicators of this :) because after the ordeal all the brain remembers is the thrill and the joy of the experience. Drinking is like that. Most of us seldom recall the misery associated with getting high.We tend to focus instead on the fleeting flirtatious pleasures of the bar. |
Hi Red, nice to hear from you. |
my mother and i had lunch with my daughter in recovery (about 5 and half months sober/clean) on march 14. we left and we both said - that was absolutely the BEST we had seen her since she started recovery in september - she was present and physically looked strong. she was calm and happy and at peace by the things she was sharing and her attitude. she was confident and relaxed. she was affectionate. she was talking about getting back to college. she was talking about her career and goals. she relapsed on march 16 - cocaine. so odd........ k |
wander1971 what got me through the early months was meetings and my AA phone network, I somehow could figure out how to pick up the phone and call some one who had been through what I was going through right at those instances. I have to say I always found it amazing how in a matter of a few minutes on the phone with another alcoholic I could go from wanting a drink so bad I could taste it to not wanting one and all I was doing was talking on the phone! AA is living proof that we are not alone and if you take a few minutes and get some phone numbers of some fellow AA folks you never have to be alone fighting that urge. Just to warn you all though, as said in the BB for every one of us there will come a day where there is nothing standing between you and a drink...... except your HP, if you call on your HP, your HP will pull you through the fire. |
Originally Posted by wander1971
(Post 1327334)
Hey RedFox, I've got the same sobriety date! I've got the same worry, too - it feels too easy.
Originally Posted by parentrecovers
(Post 1327426)
...she was present and physically looked strong. she was calm and happy and at peace by the things she was sharing and her attitude. she was confident and relaxed. she was affectionate. she was talking about getting back to college. she was talking about her career and goals. she relapsed on march 16 - cocaine. so odd........
Originally Posted by CarolD
(Post 1327250)
I wrote down all the misery of my 3 day de tox (they are in our "Quitting" sticky too) and kept them in my purse. |
Hi Redfox, I was thinkin about your pictures the other day. You are qwesome....I know shat you mean about becoming complacent. I found that I needed to make list, log feelings, write reasons and plans for my life in the short term and long term, yeah, goals, just like normal people. However, in my list were the dirty deeds of why i can't drink, no, not even one, because I knew from what I read here I would forget the reasons later...things get so good in the beginning, high, high, and low, low, both good reasons for the alkie to drink......so complacent, oh real easy to do,,,,,thats why I am in couseling, I continue to dig in my soul to find th true meaning of life alfie, joke... We must remind ourselves daily of our short and long term goals to remind us that drinking just does'nt fit in to them.. there is so much more... Drink, sure, and for maybe 1 hour we will feel bliss of a fake kind, don't drink, and yes we will feel bliss for the strength an courage to not........................... Love and Hope, hope3 |
Hi Red - Hang in there. I know what you are going through. I've been feeling great and then had a bad couple of days. My sponsor is out of town and I've been over busy at work. It does not help. I've had cravings only when I let things (meetings, phone calls) go. We can do this!! TinLizzy |
Hey Jen, I had 5 months yesterday. What I'll state from my experience thus far...is that my sobriety is ever changing. My first 3 months were almost surreal and my emotions a rollercoaster buoyed by a pink cloud of enthusiasm, relief (and yes niggling fear) about my sobriety and alternately, losing it. Every day, every week, every month is a new emotional experience for me. Sobriety is oh sooooooo much better...easier? No way..but definitely better, better, better! Whatever it is you're feeling right now....will change....the tides keep turning...hang with support cuz some days..yes, some days.. you will definitely be tossed upon stormy seas and for most of the others...the sun will shine brighter and warmer than it's ever been. Blessings.... |
Kudo's to all celebrating Day2 or more sober time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Red.... The Big Book..especially the stories show this is a normal reaction.. Pink Clouding.... When they started to come down their sponsors pointed out to them they had not built a solid foundation.. They had built their sobriety on "feelings"... The remedy? Usually finding another alcoholic to encourage..and taking the Steps.. and prayer... What you are feeling is normal..and time to throw yourself harder into your Program and keep sharing... It is working for me... I wish you the best..(please read The Book). Love, :Flower111: IO |
Originally Posted by hope3
(Post 1328142)
Hi Redfox, I was thinkin about your pictures the other day. You are qwesome....I know shat you mean about becoming complacent. thats why I am in couseling, I continue to dig in my soul to find th true meaning of life alfie, joke... We must remind ourselves daily of our short and long term goals to remind us that drinking just does'nt fit in to them.. there is so much more... Drink, sure, and for maybe 1 hour we will feel bliss of a fake kind, don't drink, and yes we will feel bliss for the strength an courage to not........................... I do definitely have goals I need to achieve here in the short term and there's some that I'd like to achieve a little further down the road. I like what you said about drinking not fitting in to them.
Originally Posted by TINLIZZY
(Post 1328231)
Hang in there. I know what you are going through. I've been feeling great and then had a bad couple of days. My sponsor is out of town and I've been over busy at work. It does not help. I've had cravings only when I let things (meetings, phone calls) go. We can do this!! TinLizzy Yes we can do this! It's kind of like I'm expecting a monster to come out and try to eat me so I'm crouched down behind a bush waiting to pounce on it, lol. I know it's there somewhere and I'm preparing myself to take it on. |
Originally Posted by IO Storm
(Post 1328262)
What you are feeling is normal..and time to throw yourself harder into your Program and keep sharing... |
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