runnin off the rails...........
Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: some where / no where
Posts: 1,019
You don't have to die, Patrick.
Keep coming back to SR, and keep looking for answers. You can get sober, and one day this hell will be a memory. AA helped me, and it's helped millions of others. You've heard all this before. When you are ready to end this suffering, and live a good life, you will be ready to get sober.
peace,
chip
Keep coming back to SR, and keep looking for answers. You can get sober, and one day this hell will be a memory. AA helped me, and it's helped millions of others. You've heard all this before. When you are ready to end this suffering, and live a good life, you will be ready to get sober.
peace,
chip
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Patrick I am sorry too, but some of us do need to have reality slap us up side the head in order to see the light. I pray that you are not BSing this time, I pray that you do go into detox/rehab and then on into a long term recovery program.
Pat the Solution is there, reach out, for the love of God, reach out and take the hand that is stretched out to help you.
Pat the Solution is there, reach out, for the love of God, reach out and take the hand that is stretched out to help you.
dum vita est spes est
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: vita secundum nex
Posts: 287
Homeslice,
Man, I know exactly how you feel. When I found this site, I literally had been praying for death...on the outside everything was peachy (nice job, nice house, good family/friends [some bad friends too of course], etc. - suffice it to say I was blessed) but on the inside I was completely empty. I was nothing more than a spectator in life watching others participate and what sucked the most is that I knew it, despite my success externally, I had failed miserably internally.
I understand your position on not wanting people to give up on you, but at what point (and I asked this of myself) can we expect others to continue to carry us - they tire just as we do. What I'm trying to say is that it's very easy for us to think about how WE feel about life, but what about those that want the best for us and see us literally pissing it away day in an day out?
Last week, for example a buddy called me and told me that I was his best friend...we had a falling out and it was the first time we had talked in about a year. Had I drank/drugged myself to death - I would have denied him a friend that he very badly needs right now. How selfish I was!
In the end bud, there is only one person that can save you and the b1tch of it is, it's the same person that is killing you. I hope your paradigm shift comes sooner than later brotherman.
Peace,
PR
Man, I know exactly how you feel. When I found this site, I literally had been praying for death...on the outside everything was peachy (nice job, nice house, good family/friends [some bad friends too of course], etc. - suffice it to say I was blessed) but on the inside I was completely empty. I was nothing more than a spectator in life watching others participate and what sucked the most is that I knew it, despite my success externally, I had failed miserably internally.
I understand your position on not wanting people to give up on you, but at what point (and I asked this of myself) can we expect others to continue to carry us - they tire just as we do. What I'm trying to say is that it's very easy for us to think about how WE feel about life, but what about those that want the best for us and see us literally pissing it away day in an day out?
Last week, for example a buddy called me and told me that I was his best friend...we had a falling out and it was the first time we had talked in about a year. Had I drank/drugged myself to death - I would have denied him a friend that he very badly needs right now. How selfish I was!
In the end bud, there is only one person that can save you and the b1tch of it is, it's the same person that is killing you. I hope your paradigm shift comes sooner than later brotherman.
Peace,
PR
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: UK
Posts: 1,415
Purple Reign, great post, thanks for that.
Homer, I'm just going to hijack your thread for a moment - Groucho, I came across that poem on this site too. It's wonderful, and I read it often, particularly when I'm slipping back into self-pity. All the talk of death makes me think this is a good place to put a little prayer request, for the wife and daughter, and friends and family of D. from my home group in Greater Manchester, UK. D died last week. He was in his early fifties. He died alone at home.
This is a killer illness.
Homer, I'm just going to hijack your thread for a moment - Groucho, I came across that poem on this site too. It's wonderful, and I read it often, particularly when I'm slipping back into self-pity. All the talk of death makes me think this is a good place to put a little prayer request, for the wife and daughter, and friends and family of D. from my home group in Greater Manchester, UK. D died last week. He was in his early fifties. He died alone at home.
This is a killer illness.
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