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Member
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 46
BTW, there is about 5 minutes of news before the interview begins. The interviewer is someone who founded a 12 step recovery program and ran it for 10 years and seems open to alternative methods but does not think that RR should oppose 12 step. Mr. Trimpey pretty much gets cut off at the end because they run out of time (some might enjoy hearing that ;-) ).
Member
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: The Basement
Posts: 724
Hey guys,
This has been a good discussion. i wanted to just reply to what Justaround and Phil said about AA focusing on the problems that lead to the drink and RR dealing with stopping the cravings.
Whether alcoholism is a disease or not, you get hooked if you're an alcoholic, right...........Here's my take on it:
I don't know about you but I started using drugs and alcohol when I was about 13. I used more and more each year for about 15 years. That is through my highscool yrs. when you're learning how to date and how to treat members of the opposite sex, how to study and apply for colleges so you can have a career and make something of yourself. The list goes on......it's basically your formative years of adolescence and early adult hood. Well, I turn around and I'm a couple yrs away from 30 and I'm sitting in a detox having lost everything.
During those years the only valuable thing I learned about life was if I went to college in NY the drinking age was still 18. I learned how to deal pot and then give people bags to go take tests for me. Lets see, I learned how to cheat, steal, and lie and all of that was so that I could get high. I was caught in the grip and my drug and alcohol use was the most important thing to me.
AA TEACHES ME HOW TO LIVE AS A PRODUCTIVE MEMBER OF SOCIETY SO THAT I COULD LIVE PEACEFULLY AROUND ALL THE OTHER PEOPLE WHO WERE BUSY BECOMING ADULTS, WHEN I WAS BUSY RUINING MY LIFE.
Basically the steps teach me how to listen to other points of view, identify my part in things and make amends where I need to.
I found out that when I stopped drinking I had a conscience and I wanted people around me who love me and that I can love. Well, I had to learn how to get a long with people, and not hurt people, and be able to accept criticism. I HAD TO GROW UP
Long before all this happened the compulsion to use had been lifted. I don't know why and I don't care. T did what they told me to do and it worked. What you call the beast, AA calls the committee and there are tools in AA to quiet the committee. The tools have to do with doing service, talking to another alcoholic and going to meetings.
You take the steps so you can be HAPPY sober.
This has been a good discussion. i wanted to just reply to what Justaround and Phil said about AA focusing on the problems that lead to the drink and RR dealing with stopping the cravings.
Whether alcoholism is a disease or not, you get hooked if you're an alcoholic, right...........Here's my take on it:
I don't know about you but I started using drugs and alcohol when I was about 13. I used more and more each year for about 15 years. That is through my highscool yrs. when you're learning how to date and how to treat members of the opposite sex, how to study and apply for colleges so you can have a career and make something of yourself. The list goes on......it's basically your formative years of adolescence and early adult hood. Well, I turn around and I'm a couple yrs away from 30 and I'm sitting in a detox having lost everything.
During those years the only valuable thing I learned about life was if I went to college in NY the drinking age was still 18. I learned how to deal pot and then give people bags to go take tests for me. Lets see, I learned how to cheat, steal, and lie and all of that was so that I could get high. I was caught in the grip and my drug and alcohol use was the most important thing to me.
AA TEACHES ME HOW TO LIVE AS A PRODUCTIVE MEMBER OF SOCIETY SO THAT I COULD LIVE PEACEFULLY AROUND ALL THE OTHER PEOPLE WHO WERE BUSY BECOMING ADULTS, WHEN I WAS BUSY RUINING MY LIFE.
Basically the steps teach me how to listen to other points of view, identify my part in things and make amends where I need to.
I found out that when I stopped drinking I had a conscience and I wanted people around me who love me and that I can love. Well, I had to learn how to get a long with people, and not hurt people, and be able to accept criticism. I HAD TO GROW UP
Long before all this happened the compulsion to use had been lifted. I don't know why and I don't care. T did what they told me to do and it worked. What you call the beast, AA calls the committee and there are tools in AA to quiet the committee. The tools have to do with doing service, talking to another alcoholic and going to meetings.
You take the steps so you can be HAPPY sober.
Paused
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: scottsdale az
Posts: 118
Stephine,
Precisously, and RR teaches you how to stay sober and be happy without meetings. I personally believe that it is all depending on the individual. Some people need the companionship of meetings and some feel they just want to do it on their own and live a happy life. I know that one of AA's concept of is that you can't do it alone. One of the theories I disliked. This theory makes it hard for many AA members to accpet other recovery programs. While in AA, many of the members believed that no other recovery program works just as a lot of RR members bash on AA. I could really care less because I have put the two together. There is no one right way and this is proven. I to started using and dealing at a young age (14) but I am only 20 so I haven't used up most of my early years. But it did waste enough brain cells for me to enjoy my adolescent years. All I know is that the earlier the recovery, the better.
Precisously, and RR teaches you how to stay sober and be happy without meetings. I personally believe that it is all depending on the individual. Some people need the companionship of meetings and some feel they just want to do it on their own and live a happy life. I know that one of AA's concept of is that you can't do it alone. One of the theories I disliked. This theory makes it hard for many AA members to accpet other recovery programs. While in AA, many of the members believed that no other recovery program works just as a lot of RR members bash on AA. I could really care less because I have put the two together. There is no one right way and this is proven. I to started using and dealing at a young age (14) but I am only 20 so I haven't used up most of my early years. But it did waste enough brain cells for me to enjoy my adolescent years. All I know is that the earlier the recovery, the better.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 46
What I would give to have stopped at 20. That's over twenty years for me. The first time I got high on alcohol and pot I was 9 years old (I had older brothers that were hippies). Oh well, can't change the past.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: The Basement
Posts: 724
Yeah me too, you are fortunate about that Justaround. I'm 39 and after 11 yrs of sobriety, I got married and am finally having kids. I have a 1 and a 2 yr old and I love it. If I could I would have had a lot more. One of the promises is that you'll not regret the past or wish to shut the door on it. I don't know if that one has necessarily come true for me yet. I see how much my parents love being grandparents and I hope I get the opportunity some day to get to know my grandchildren.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Zion, Illinois
Posts: 3,411
Justaround,
You wrote:
"Yes, AA seems to be more based on WHY you started hitting the bottle and RR is more about HOW to control the urges that you still have. I learned a lot about my past in AA, why I started to use, why I felt the way I did, and so forth. But it wasn't teaching ME the way to QUIT."
I found that through working the steps the way the Big Book tells me, and asking God for help, I haven't had any urges whatsoever in the past 25+ years. Also, my interpretation of the AA program is that it's not about quiting. It's about learning how to live so that I don't have to drink. The Big Book tells me that if I don't want what AA has and if I'm not willing to go to any length, to "Go back out and try some controlled drinking.
I pray that you're all blessed today and Easy Does It.
You wrote:
"Yes, AA seems to be more based on WHY you started hitting the bottle and RR is more about HOW to control the urges that you still have. I learned a lot about my past in AA, why I started to use, why I felt the way I did, and so forth. But it wasn't teaching ME the way to QUIT."
I found that through working the steps the way the Big Book tells me, and asking God for help, I haven't had any urges whatsoever in the past 25+ years. Also, my interpretation of the AA program is that it's not about quiting. It's about learning how to live so that I don't have to drink. The Big Book tells me that if I don't want what AA has and if I'm not willing to go to any length, to "Go back out and try some controlled drinking.
I pray that you're all blessed today and Easy Does It.
Paused
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Bear DE
Posts: 31
I started drinking regularly when I was about 16. I probably had my first drink around 11 or 12 when I snuk one of my Dad's beers - I hated it. But then I tried a screwdriver. I hated the taste but loved the feeling. Then it was off to the races. I was in the bottle about 13 years. I don't know if could have made it twenty years. I'd probably either be dead or so set in my ways, I'd be like Nick Cage in "Leaving Las Vegas."
I have seen the "ours in the only way" attitude in some AA meetings. I got some it of from my sponsor when he saw the focus of my recovery changing to a Biblical rather than Big Book approach. I never held it against him. Working the steps is what worked for my sponsor, so why wouldn't he want me to do the same thing? But there also people who weren't too concerned with the means that we got sober. They wanted to hear our experience, strength and hope.
I always tryed to separate people's interpretations of AA from what was written in the Big Book. Because, quite frankly, some of the viewpoints DID seem a bit narrow minded.
I think there are some people in recovery, in any program, who are going to say that their way is best. They may be seeking validation that they made the right choice. Then are some that are going to care only that someone is sober and not worry about they got there.
Me? I'm only worried about the ends, the sobriety. God is what works for me, because self-reliance was dismal failure. But others may be able to make it on their own.
That is my experience
Good luck to everyone and God bless.
I have seen the "ours in the only way" attitude in some AA meetings. I got some it of from my sponsor when he saw the focus of my recovery changing to a Biblical rather than Big Book approach. I never held it against him. Working the steps is what worked for my sponsor, so why wouldn't he want me to do the same thing? But there also people who weren't too concerned with the means that we got sober. They wanted to hear our experience, strength and hope.
I always tryed to separate people's interpretations of AA from what was written in the Big Book. Because, quite frankly, some of the viewpoints DID seem a bit narrow minded.
I think there are some people in recovery, in any program, who are going to say that their way is best. They may be seeking validation that they made the right choice. Then are some that are going to care only that someone is sober and not worry about they got there.
Me? I'm only worried about the ends, the sobriety. God is what works for me, because self-reliance was dismal failure. But others may be able to make it on their own.
That is my experience
Good luck to everyone and God bless.
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