Tazman53

Ah yes the infamous cake theif!! LOL

mikel60

"If you don't consider it a relapse, then it doesn't really count as a drinking day. I would encourage newcomers to do the same. Like I said before, it's honesty with oneself. I feel I am being honest and deserve the cake and 1 year chip. A few AA folks will even take me out to dinner. Let me ask you folks this, what's the big deal?? It's progress not perfection."

This is a joke, right? Tell us that this is all a put on to stimulate conversation. You just forgot to put ROTFLMAO, right?

tiburon88

No mikel I feel that I earned the 1 year cake and chip. I just define relapse differently than most folks in AA. Why do people keep taking my inventory? I told just a few close friends in the program and one good friend outside the program (he's an active drug addict). I'm not going talk about at meetings. Why should I?? I've been around the program for 5 years. I'm not going to get a 5 year coin. I feel like I was relapsing back then. But this past year I have one day of drinking "a few" beers and I am NOT considering that a slip.

c'est la vie

I'm not a day counter and even stopped attending AA meetings because I worried more about the number of days I had rather than how I was living each day.

Since leaving AA I have had a few drinks. My doctor and therapist both believe that my drinking was not consistant with alcoholism and don't believe a drink with dinner will lead to further problems. (I'm not looking for others to "take my inventory" I'm just offering an example that relates to the origianal poster)



Since my doc advised me to try adding an occasional drink with dinner, I'm not looking at my current situation as a relapse either, HOWEVER, I sure as heck don't call the days that I have a glass of wine a "non-drinking day". That's the most absurd thing I've ever heard.

You should be glad that you only had a few beers in a year and that you are in a better place in life. Congratulations! But if you're not a day counter and you don't believe in AA philosophy, then why is it so important for you to have us accept your belief that days that you have a few beers are not drinking days. It's your life and we're not counting.


If it walks like a duck and looks like a duck, but I don't hear it quack, does that mean it's not really a duck?

Rusty G

Just do the best you can Tib. I won't judge you. I'm well.

Tazman53

Tib I agree that a few beers does not a relapse make, but in my area we give out chips to people who can honestly say they have not had a drink in a certain length of time, there is nothing mentioned about relapses.

I am in AA and I would not say a few beers is a relapse, but it is a break in constant sobriety.

Tib look closely at what people are trying so hard to point out to you.

They are not saying anything about you having a few beers, what they are trying very hard to point out is the lack of honesty.

Brother you can take this or leave it, but for this old recovered drunk, if I and many other alcoholics started living a lie, the guilt would eventually lead me back to a drink or finally admitting to every one I had lied to that I had done so.

Since I have gotten sober honesty has become very important to me, because lying is what kept me drinking for years.

Pride will kill an alcoholic unless it is deflated to a certain point allowing humbleness and honesty to kick in.

Grasshopper

Yup thats what its about,as posted above me.Some call it,relapse,some call it a slip.I call it as it is--and that is i chose to take a drink.I was 10 years sober,chose to drink,which put me back to the obession,for 5 days,and came back to my home group,for i needed help.And i made myself accountable.I told on my disease.I could care less what others thought about it,i was there to get help.I needed to get to the root and causes of why i went back to drinking.My past is a tool that i use today to be of help to others.
Already this is effecting you.You didnt put this in the AA,section,because you dont want to hear from the members.You want to leave AA,now,.I wont co-sign this for you.If i were your sponsor,id ask you to be honest,tell what happened,and tell what actions your going to take for your soberiety.Your story will help others,as well as yourself.Only the truth will set you free.You can do it.Tell on your disease.
The question,counting days harmful to some?My opinion is no,.

paulmh

C'est la vie said:

That's what AA teaches me. I have my life, Tib has his. Both of us act, and live with the consequences of our actions. I don't live with the consequences of Tib's actions.......

unless I choose to


Peace out brothers and sisters. The thread was more productive when we were discussing confectionery. I was waiting for the recipes to start.

pigswillfly

I couldn't agree more. I think initially it's good to quantify the achievement; you know... days... but once you start getting into months it sets you up for a big fall.
I plan to quietly mark anniversaries of my quit date but not do the whole 1 month, 2 month thing again.

Jeez, I messed up after three and a half months and DAY 1 is such a depressing thought with that in mind.
Wish I could get this off the ground again.

zJoe99

I plan to count the days until I get to 90 days. I don't plan on being too obsessed with sobriety time after I reach this milestone though.

However, I plan to remember my sobriety date this time. In the past, months then years would go by and I would eventually forget my sobriety date. Then I would drift away from recovery resources and eventually forget about my past troubles with alcohol. Inevitably, some event would trigger my latent alcoholism and I'd be off to the races again. Its shocking how quickly I self destruct when I pick up the bottle again.

If sobriety is important to me then my sobriety date must be important to me as well. For an alcoholic like me, it must be the most significant date in my life.

Tazman53

Right there with you brother!

mikel60

"Why do people keep taking my inventory?"
Tiburon,
You put a statement out there on a discussion forum and people are going to comment on it. Expression of a differing viewpoint is not taking your inventory. I've gotta believe that if you participate in a message board you want honest feedback. I actually thought you might be kidding to get a rise out of people. Seeing as you are not, I'll just say peace out and good luck with your program.
Mike

Fluttering

Pigswllfly

you will get there!!!

You are a memer of a huge support system that will help you if you allow us to

Fluttering

Hi doorknob
No one is repremanding-at least not intentionally.......
We offer support, we share experience, strength, hope--and on a number of occasions laughs.
Someimes I am more sensitive than other days and it sure feels as if I am being "disciplined"--or slapped on the hand...but I love ya...
So does God...and he has a sense of humor too...

Where did you get the name 'doorknob" ?? When I was in college a friend--in the program referred to a few of my fellow students as doorknobs..and there was one that it was appropriate...just curious..Not a common user name..and I really miss that friend
Thank you for reminding me to send an email off to him.

CarolD

pigswillfly....Welcome to the Alcoholism Forum