dolphingirl

Hi everyone,
Today, and probably about 100 days following this, i made a decision to give up alcohol. But the problem is, i keep going back to it like a moth to a flame.
I really really want to give up, but now, everytime i finish work, i end up at the club playing the pokies and drinking till i get drunk. I just cant seem to 'stop'.
How did you all manage to stop, what did it take to make you stop.
My main problem is i can go through the day without drinking etc, its just every second or third day, that feeling comes back and then i fall again.
I really want to stop, i pray and pray to stop, but i need a few ideas and suggestions.
Thanks very much for your help
dolphingirl

GlassPrisoner

Maddening, isn't it ?

I was the same way. Even when I got to the point to where I was basically de-toxing/having withdraw if I went more than 4 hours without alcohol. I could stop, but I couldn't stay stopped.

Things had to get pretty painful before I became willing to do whatever it takes. I finally found myself somewhere I avoided like the plague. Yup, the rooms of AA.

I'll tell you what, it's worth it swallowing your pride and going there.

ay100

It is the addiction, the disease and that inner demons made us fall off the vagon from now and then. I might suggest that you change your social envirınment i.e instead of going to club after work go take a stroll in open air or find something to fill that time. For me between 6 pm and 8 pm is dangerous, that's where the craving happens once I get over that time period I feel fine.

Try AA, it really does help.

peace

Hush007

Well,... I do not have real suggestions at this time since I've only been sober since Monday. But there are a lot of wise people (they also learned it the hard way) who can give you some pointers. As previously stated, A.A. and a change in your daily schedule could be a great help.

Go for it Girl! You made the right choice!

RedFox

Sounds like changing your environment like ay100 said would be a good start. It seems to be the only thing that's stopping me from drinking at the moment.

detoxication

Hi, let me ask you this:
Why do you want to stop?
Is it because it causes you trouble or because you can´t control it?

I had to get rescued by my family, and learned the hard way the effects alcohol has on me. This is how low I had to sink before I was convinced I had a problem, maybe you haven´t reached your bottom yet. If indeed you are an alcoholic you will reach rock bottom at some point, and there will be no more doubt in your mind.

Please take this the way it is intended, a pep talk. I´m only about 3 months sober, and even though I still dream of a beer now and again it conjours up images of me lying in my bed drinking like a fish just to avoid getting the shakes.

In my case and many others, we had to hit rock bottom full speed and get help from others to pull it off. Think about asking for help, some times people you think don´t know about your problem have been on to you for ages.

Ask anybody here for help, and stop beating yourself over the head. It is a real problem to many people, you didn´t invent it and you are not a bad person because you suffer from it!

I searched this forum for tips and tricks when I first arrived, but didn´t find much so here is what I do when cravings and logic are fighting for supremacy:

Chocolatemilk with ice cream fills that hole in the stomac!

When I get shaky and nervous I power walk for an hour.

Mints settle the stomac.

Talking to my family reminds me what one beer does to me.

Taking the odd tablet when anxiety strikes.

My best wishes

Jacob

BBQBOY

Knowledge.... Learn as much as you can stand about alcoholism.. I always thought I knew everything (typical alkie thinking) which held me back from the recovery process. My nasty inner voice started to be crowded out with all that learnin'. Also keep posting and sharing with a group, it helps to keep issues out in the open.....

Work Hard and Enjoy life....NED

Tazman53

Welcome to SR dolphingirl, my wife loves dolphins BTW.

I put myself into detox initially to get sober, but I drank for 40 years, I tried quitting on my own for the last 10 years and the only thing I achieved was making myself a miserable drunk and drinking more then ever.

How do I stay sober now? One day at a time. When I wake up in the morning I thank God, my Higher Power that I understand, again for all that he has blessed me with, then I ask him to give me the strength to simply not drink today and to give me the strength to do the things he wants/needs me to do.

In the evening I thank him for me not drinking today and for all he has blessed me with.

FOREVER, or even 6 months is to hard for this old drunk to commit to, AA has taught me that one of the most important things for me to do to stay sober and happy is to live in today, the past is gone and there is nothing I can do to change it, and the future will always be tomorrow and I have no control over it so why worry about it.

The very first step I had to take in getting/staying sober was to understand that I am an alcoholic, I am powerless over alcohol, and my life was unmanageable as long as I drank.

With out the above I would never have got sober or stayed sober. AA saved my life.

Why did I stop? My personal bottom, I saw death staring me in the face if I did not stop, I was at the point of losing my family if I kept drinking and knew that if I lost them all that was left for me was drinking myself to death.

CarolD

Here is my suggestion...
find info on the disease of alcoholism.

My favorite resource on alcoholism is
"Under The Influence"
and it has a sequel..."Beyond The Influence"

Both can be ordered from Amazon.

We also have excerpts from "Under"
Please click
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...influence.html

Take care...keep posting...ask questions
Welcome to SR!

UncleEarl

I am in no way trying to denigrate prayer, but prayer alone won't move you to long-term sobriety.

One of the best lines I picked up at this place (which I find myself repeating) is: Quitting is simple, but not always easy.

What made my recent sobriety possible...after SOOO many previous failed attempts...was that I had a solid plan. I had -and still have- a plan of changing what I do during a day, eliminating certain toxic elements from my life, changing the way I think about alcohol, an exercize plan (as if!!), a dietary plan, etc.

I am not a member of AA, but I don't hesitate to suggest that you sit in on a meeting and see just how much joy can come from the simple fact of being sober. Moreover, they have a pretty darned clear plan set up to help guide you to a better way to live your life.

Hope you keep us posted, you will find a LOT of love, support, and understanding here!

Earl

came2believe

As stated above, AA helped me quit drinking.

As for prayer: Before attending AA, I prayed millions of times for God to make me a nonalcoholic person. I prayed for God to make me quit drinking, too. That very night I would find myself staring at the bottle of wine, taking about a half second and then saying, "Ah what the hell... I deserve it..."

It took a long time in AA, but I realized my prayer was directed toward telling God what to do, much like I used to make a list for Santa Claus. Prayer works in my life today, but I have learned there are two sides to prayer.

It is not for me to tell God what to do. It is for me to listen and discern what God wishes for me in my life, and then carry that out.

I have discerned God created me an alcoholic. That is not going to change no matter how hard I pray. Fortunately however, I have also discerned that God does not want me to drink. My part in the matter is that I have to pick up the ball & run with it. I know what to do to avoid drinking. So I do it.

I got this saying in my email one day (from a recovery email list). I believe it is a quote from Muhammand. It is: Trust in Allah, but tie up your camel.

That means that God will help you, and will give you strength whenever you ask, but you have to do your share.

For me, this meant attending AA, getting a sponsor, doing the stepwork.

Voila. I am sober over a year now.

dolphingirl

Thank you all for your posts!
Ive taken the advice on board and im going to go to AA!
Thank you so very much
dolphy

CarolD

Glad you made a poitive decision!

Tazman53

dolphingirl that is a very smart move, here are some suggestions:

1. Try to find a "Beginners meeting"
2. Show up 15-20 minutes early, you might make a freind or meet someone you already know.
3. You do not have to say a word if you do not want to.
4. If some one ask you to share and you don't want to just say "I am just listening today" or "Pass"
5. If you think about it before or after the meeting ask a lady what a temporary sponsor is?
6. Be prepared to stay a little bit after the meeting, you may find someone you want to talk with.
7. Get phone numbers of ladies, they are a good thing to have in case you are thinking about picking up, call some one in AA first, they will be more then happy to help you out.

The most important thing to keep in mind is to not listen to what is different between you and them, but to listen for what you have in common with folks.

One more thing, if you do not like the people at a meeting, go to another one, every meeting is different, each meeting has it's own personality.