peeling the onion
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Anytown, USA
Posts: 264
peeling the onion
Hi guys,
I sooo love this site. Coming on here and sharing my Experience, Strength & Hope with others is a great gift to me.
I have been sober just over a year and lately I am feeling like there is something more I've got to deal with. When I got sober I concluded that since life didn't suck, it must be perfect. I sailed on a pink cloud for almost this whole time.
Lately I have hit a dark wall. I catch myself thinking that since life isn't perfect, it must suck. Like that we are all just so screwed up in one way or another. My marriage is far from perfect and I am far from a perfect mom or housekeeper or--well anything. I have career issues too, and it goes on--
I have so far to go! My husband and I are both working on the marriage thru counseling. I am trying to pray each morning to do the next right thing, and stuff with kids & career is getting better.
But I wonder if I have more work on myself to do. Here is the thought. My parents are both Alcoholic. Although they gave me what they could growing up, we never wanted for food, clothing, education, when push came to shove they chose alcohol over me and my sis every time.
Do you think I need to do some ACoA work or Al-Anon work. My A parents are across the country from me. They claim to have quit drinking-but don't use AA. I don't have to deal with them much though they are still in my life.
Maybe this is in the wrong forum but I feel this is some sort of transition for me or that I am on the verge of something. I know the black-or-white thinking is very typical of ACoAs. I just thought I was done with problems. Crazy huh? Maybe I'm just lazy, I just didn't want to do any more f*cking work!
Thanks for listening. I certainly don't plan to drink over any of this but would welcome insight...
I sooo love this site. Coming on here and sharing my Experience, Strength & Hope with others is a great gift to me.
I have been sober just over a year and lately I am feeling like there is something more I've got to deal with. When I got sober I concluded that since life didn't suck, it must be perfect. I sailed on a pink cloud for almost this whole time.
Lately I have hit a dark wall. I catch myself thinking that since life isn't perfect, it must suck. Like that we are all just so screwed up in one way or another. My marriage is far from perfect and I am far from a perfect mom or housekeeper or--well anything. I have career issues too, and it goes on--
I have so far to go! My husband and I are both working on the marriage thru counseling. I am trying to pray each morning to do the next right thing, and stuff with kids & career is getting better.
But I wonder if I have more work on myself to do. Here is the thought. My parents are both Alcoholic. Although they gave me what they could growing up, we never wanted for food, clothing, education, when push came to shove they chose alcohol over me and my sis every time.
Do you think I need to do some ACoA work or Al-Anon work. My A parents are across the country from me. They claim to have quit drinking-but don't use AA. I don't have to deal with them much though they are still in my life.
Maybe this is in the wrong forum but I feel this is some sort of transition for me or that I am on the verge of something. I know the black-or-white thinking is very typical of ACoAs. I just thought I was done with problems. Crazy huh? Maybe I'm just lazy, I just didn't want to do any more f*cking work!
Thanks for listening. I certainly don't plan to drink over any of this but would welcome insight...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Anytown, USA
Posts: 264
Thank you! I gotta say also, Uncle Earl's post made me look at my life and smile again. Progress not perfection--right? I'll just use these feelings as a reminder not to rest on my laurels and maybe I'll talk it all over with the therapist.
not a greeter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: padmasana
Posts: 13,927
Your welcome 
. I'm just thinking that you might someday regret not trying to figure it out. If you feel something needs work, then it probably does. Talking w/ your therapist is a great idea. That's what they're there for.
. I'm just thinking that you might someday regret not trying to figure it out. If you feel something needs work, then it probably does. Talking w/ your therapist is a great idea. That's what they're there for.
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
C2B a guy I know in the rooms has quite a few years under his belt and now attends AA and Ala-non, I beleive it is his son who is a practicing alcoholic, any how he said it helped him quite a bit.
I understand where you are coming from C2B, I have not reached any where near the point you have in your sobriety, but I can see where I could want more then I have, I am an alcoholic so as I guess you know as with booze so it goes with life, there are so many things that a little is never enough! I keep myself in check by telling myself I need to be happy seeing myself continue to progress and only worry/work harder if I see myself losing ground.
I understand where you are coming from C2B, I have not reached any where near the point you have in your sobriety, but I can see where I could want more then I have, I am an alcoholic so as I guess you know as with booze so it goes with life, there are so many things that a little is never enough! I keep myself in check by telling myself I need to be happy seeing myself continue to progress and only worry/work harder if I see myself losing ground.
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
Hiya C2B,
I am firm believer that we are constantly a "work in progress". If something is niggling at ya, then yes explore that. That is what we truly should be in this journey "explorers" seeking that which is undiscovered within ourselves. The combination of seeking knowledge and faith is magic waiting to happen. The darkness begs for the light.
Happy trails explorer,
T.
I am firm believer that we are constantly a "work in progress". If something is niggling at ya, then yes explore that. That is what we truly should be in this journey "explorers" seeking that which is undiscovered within ourselves. The combination of seeking knowledge and faith is magic waiting to happen. The darkness begs for the light.
Happy trails explorer,
T.
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