mikee

2yrs of sober living managed me to feel alive and ambitious for a while yet I am 48 years old and started drinking again for what reason I cant explain in whatever excuse I can come up with, well i guess im tired of my self-abuse and my desire for self destuction ,is unfounded ,yet i continue,, please someone pray for me .thanks

TorontoGuy28

Mikee - can't offer you advise, but would suggest you go to an AA meeting...

The madness can stop. You are in charge.

GlassPrisoner

Alcoholics don't need a reason to drink. We just do. Although when asked why, we'll give a million different plausible reasons. Hell, I was so good at twisting the truth, I had friends and family say to me "Hell, I'd drink to if I were you !".

By the Grace of God, today the obsession to drink has been removed.

Nuudawn

Welcome Mikee,
As GlassPrisoner says, it is futile to spend any energy on the why at this point. It happened but now you have today. The past is gone and you are free to make a choice about the now. Do you want to keep drinking? If not, drag your sorry self to the nearest meeting and join the rest of us with the penchant for self abuse and self destruction. We understand. We are here...so let's get moving! I think you've already made your decision to get back in the saddle...that's why you posted. C'mon in, the water's fine.

CarolD

Hi again Mikee,

Use your past sober time as a base for
your fresh start.

The only failure is to quit trying!

Hugs and Blesssings

ay100

Hi Mike;

The excuses are unlimited. They never end. Everytime I was depressed about something it was excuse enough for me to pick up a drink. I hope you will get some help and take one day at a time. It is never to late to make a fresh start.

came2believe

Welcome back home!

Might I suggest you try an AA meeting if you haven't. Our group welcomes back people who've relapsed with open arms. In fact, I have learned more from shares from people who've relapsed than from almost anyone else. Your group needs you!

I will say a prayer for you, also.

Tazman53

Mikee you will be in my prayers, but as others have said I will suggest as well get into an AA meeting or any other support group you can find with enough meetings in enough areas with enough people to give you the support you need.

If you were in AA before I will bet money that you did at least some of the following before you picked up again.

1. Quit going to meetings
2. Quit calling sponsor or other folks in network
3. Quit praying
4. Quit reading the BB
5. Quit or never started working the steps.

The disease is there forever, it is like an animal laying in ambush for you telling you it will be different this time, I can drink like a normal person! As an alcoholic I know I can never drink like a normal person.

leviathon

You are in my thoughts Mikee. I will pray for you.

Peace, Levi

chip

Mikee

I hope you can have a fresh start. Those two years have shown you that life is better when you are sober. You can take what you learned in those 2 years, and work it back into your life.

I hope you keep posting, and I hope you find sobriety again.
chip

Time2Surrender

Mikee. We have missed you. We both joined SR at the same time. You used to be here almost everyday. Reading your posts in the past, I have a feeling you know what you need to do. Stick around buddy. We will be here for you. I will keep you in my prayers.