I don't know if this will work but will try...
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Livonia, MI
Posts: 675
Originally Posted by Chronos97 
I don't and won't go to AA...no time, don't like the cult type feel I get from there.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Frederick MD
Posts: 36
with this site and with my own dedication I have talked to my family and I realized after just 2 days I can't get to taking my antabuse w/out their help. My dad is home from a trip on Friday. Saturday morning at breakfast I plan w/ my families support to take my pill and fight this disease. I do not plan on bingeing until then and in fact have been slowing down from 12 to 9 beers a night weening until Saturday.
I will get on this same blog on Saturday morning to let you all know and then will be more of a presence to talk and look for support.
To earlybird....my apologies as I don't ever judge something w/out trying....the unknown is scary and sometimes when one has a idea about something doesn't make it right.
I will get on this same blog on Saturday morning to let you all know and then will be more of a presence to talk and look for support.
To earlybird....my apologies as I don't ever judge something w/out trying....the unknown is scary and sometimes when one has a idea about something doesn't make it right.
Don't get undies in a bunch
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: South Shore MA
Posts: 7,120
Chronos
As far as your thoughts about AA go... many of us had those same thoughts.
Some that go to AA still carry those thoughts as well but they have learned...
Take what you want and leave the rest. Or in other words... take what works for you and when you find you need more, gather more.
As far as your thoughts about AA go... many of us had those same thoughts.
Some that go to AA still carry those thoughts as well but they have learned...
Take what you want and leave the rest. Or in other words... take what works for you and when you find you need more, gather more.
Glad to be here
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Louisville, KY
Posts: 11
A pill may help someone quit alcohol, but it will not cure alcoholISM.
It is beneficial for anyone who thinks they may be alcoholic to learn WHAT AN ALCOHOLIC IS. The problem is NOT alcohol. If it was, then why would we ever drink again after detoxing it out of our system?
It's because the problem of an alcoholic centers in their mind. That strange mental obsession that makes us want to drink, even we don't have any alcohol in our body.
A dry drunk is as sick as a wet one too.. restless, irritable, discontent, anxious, fearful the list goes on and on.
That is precisely why AA can work - you don't have to do it alone.
I will never forget how I felt when I walked into my first AA meeting
They were talking about HOW I FELT, HOW I THOUGHT! How did they know? For the first time in my life, I felt like others understood me!! As I heard a speaker this weekend say "these were my people."
I never realized that the reason I felt 'different' growing up was because I am different. Addiction medicine is fascinating - they are finding out all the chemical reasons why alcoholics FEEL different. I cannot speak on that expertly but it is interesting to find out all the reasons that contribute =- not only the physical aspect, but the mental and emotional parts, which set up the spiritual malady (isolation, trust no one etc)
To Chronos... hate to tell you this, but there is a quote in AA literature specifically for your type "We tried to find an easier, softer way". Maybe it will work for you - maybe you are just a chronic drinker and not a real alcoholic. But I promise you, the way you are talking is the way almost EVERY alcoholic sitting in AA was talking before they joined.
To the cult comment - yes I see why you think that. For one thing, we have a bond - a common problem and a common solution on which we can agree -there is a comraderie in that, and a strength as a group. It is easy to feel "not part of" in some meetings - but find a newcomers meeting where people are more likely to reach out to you if you do go.
The other cultish aspect is changing our thinking - it is VITAL to change the way I think about my life - to stop trying to "fix, manage and control" everyone and everything around me - that is my alcoholic personality and with it I created chaos and misery ultimately - like a little kid who doesn't get her way and has tantrums and doesn't want to pay the consequences. All of this is why I drank because life didn't treat me right or I simply couldn't or didn't want to follow life's rules! (really I'd drink for any reason, happy or not but you see what I mean)
Living by the 12 steps gives me a way of life that helps me deal with life sober and PEACEFUL. It's amazing. I never had methods like this that ever came close to working.
I could go on, running out of steam.
It is beneficial for anyone who thinks they may be alcoholic to learn WHAT AN ALCOHOLIC IS. The problem is NOT alcohol. If it was, then why would we ever drink again after detoxing it out of our system?
It's because the problem of an alcoholic centers in their mind. That strange mental obsession that makes us want to drink, even we don't have any alcohol in our body.
A dry drunk is as sick as a wet one too.. restless, irritable, discontent, anxious, fearful the list goes on and on.
That is precisely why AA can work - you don't have to do it alone.
I will never forget how I felt when I walked into my first AA meeting
They were talking about HOW I FELT, HOW I THOUGHT! How did they know? For the first time in my life, I felt like others understood me!! As I heard a speaker this weekend say "these were my people."
I never realized that the reason I felt 'different' growing up was because I am different. Addiction medicine is fascinating - they are finding out all the chemical reasons why alcoholics FEEL different. I cannot speak on that expertly but it is interesting to find out all the reasons that contribute =- not only the physical aspect, but the mental and emotional parts, which set up the spiritual malady (isolation, trust no one etc)
To Chronos... hate to tell you this, but there is a quote in AA literature specifically for your type "We tried to find an easier, softer way". Maybe it will work for you - maybe you are just a chronic drinker and not a real alcoholic. But I promise you, the way you are talking is the way almost EVERY alcoholic sitting in AA was talking before they joined.
To the cult comment - yes I see why you think that. For one thing, we have a bond - a common problem and a common solution on which we can agree -there is a comraderie in that, and a strength as a group. It is easy to feel "not part of" in some meetings - but find a newcomers meeting where people are more likely to reach out to you if you do go.
The other cultish aspect is changing our thinking - it is VITAL to change the way I think about my life - to stop trying to "fix, manage and control" everyone and everything around me - that is my alcoholic personality and with it I created chaos and misery ultimately - like a little kid who doesn't get her way and has tantrums and doesn't want to pay the consequences. All of this is why I drank because life didn't treat me right or I simply couldn't or didn't want to follow life's rules! (really I'd drink for any reason, happy or not but you see what I mean)
Living by the 12 steps gives me a way of life that helps me deal with life sober and PEACEFUL. It's amazing. I never had methods like this that ever came close to working.
I could go on, running out of steam.
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Australia
Posts: 43
Hi Chronos,
I just wanted to add a quick note regarding the "masking Anxiety and depression". Alcohol is both a depressent and it can cause panic attacks and anxiety. I have had both anxiety and depression - I'm ok now- and know from exprience that neither drugs or alcohol help and in most cases makes both the negative feelings and anxiety worse.
I don't get anxious anymore, unless I've been drinking heavily the night before (I'm 28 yrs old and I've been off the grog for 6 days now and aiming to stay sober until the 3rd of February- not sure if I'll drink again, but if I tried to quit for life I think it would overwhelm me - I'm a once a week binge drinker- can have one glass of wine, but two= 20!).
I'm not in AA and at this stage feel like this site and determination alone will be enough. Good luck mate,
Jen
I just wanted to add a quick note regarding the "masking Anxiety and depression". Alcohol is both a depressent and it can cause panic attacks and anxiety. I have had both anxiety and depression - I'm ok now- and know from exprience that neither drugs or alcohol help and in most cases makes both the negative feelings and anxiety worse.
I don't get anxious anymore, unless I've been drinking heavily the night before (I'm 28 yrs old and I've been off the grog for 6 days now and aiming to stay sober until the 3rd of February- not sure if I'll drink again, but if I tried to quit for life I think it would overwhelm me - I'm a once a week binge drinker- can have one glass of wine, but two= 20!).
I'm not in AA and at this stage feel like this site and determination alone will be enough. Good luck mate,
Jen
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Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Toronto
Posts: 98
I am glad you are recogising how drinking is affecting your life financially & from a physical & emotional health perspective.
See a physician and work with them on a plan to quit drinking, have them monitor you.
There are other organisations outside of AA that may help. Here is the sticky on them.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-programs.html
AA, no AA, other program, no other program, the most important is that you make a decision to quit and stick to it. It sounds like you are having difficulty so you may want to try one of the other organisations for help and support.
See a physician and work with them on a plan to quit drinking, have them monitor you.
There are other organisations outside of AA that may help. Here is the sticky on them.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-programs.html
AA, no AA, other program, no other program, the most important is that you make a decision to quit and stick to it. It sounds like you are having difficulty so you may want to try one of the other organisations for help and support.
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
When one hits bottom, thier real bottom they are like a drowning man, they will grab any life preserver they can no matter what it looks like, and if that life preserver fails them they will grab another one.
Some peoples alcholism sadly is so deeply effecting them that it causes them to ignore possible solutions to thier drinking due to thier prejudices, and they drown in it.
Some peoples alcholism sadly is so deeply effecting them that it causes them to ignore possible solutions to thier drinking due to thier prejudices, and they drown in it.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Frederick MD
Posts: 36
I'm sorry I hadn't posted lately. Was going back and forth about wether I should take the pill....etc. With the support of my brother I took the pill today. it will be the first time in over 2 years I will be alcohol free tonight. It's scary to think what it's going to be like as I don't know myself outside of beer me at night.
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Chronos you have made the first step, by having to have the help of your brother simply to take the pill would tell me if I was you that I needed help in doing this.
The help I sought was from those who are alcoholics that know how to get and stay sober and have been where I am at now.
The best thing in the world for my recovery was knowing that I was not alone, that I could go to a meeting, I could pick up the phone and talk to someone who understood me as an alcoholic and if I needed them to come over they would.
Chronos I wish you all the best in the world but antabuse is not a magical cure for alcohlism, it will not stop withdrawals if you are going to get them, it is nothing but an aid to not drink because now if you drink it will make you sick as a dog.
Please keep using it though for some folks the realization that if I drink I am going to get very sick is enough to get them through the tough spots.
Remember there is a whole lot more to staying sober then just taking a pill and not drinking. You are not alone keep that in mind.
If you reach the point where you are going nuts for a drink and you feel crazy enough to drink, antabuse or not, pick up the phone book and call someone who has been where you are at, they can help you through this.
Thanks to AA I never have a fear of what it is going to be like without drinking, I know what it is like, it is happy, joyous and free!!!
Hang in there, what ever way you stop drinking you will feel better, it is a beginning to a new life if you work at it.
The help I sought was from those who are alcoholics that know how to get and stay sober and have been where I am at now.
The best thing in the world for my recovery was knowing that I was not alone, that I could go to a meeting, I could pick up the phone and talk to someone who understood me as an alcoholic and if I needed them to come over they would.
Chronos I wish you all the best in the world but antabuse is not a magical cure for alcohlism, it will not stop withdrawals if you are going to get them, it is nothing but an aid to not drink because now if you drink it will make you sick as a dog.
Please keep using it though for some folks the realization that if I drink I am going to get very sick is enough to get them through the tough spots.
Remember there is a whole lot more to staying sober then just taking a pill and not drinking. You are not alone keep that in mind.
If you reach the point where you are going nuts for a drink and you feel crazy enough to drink, antabuse or not, pick up the phone book and call someone who has been where you are at, they can help you through this.
Thanks to AA I never have a fear of what it is going to be like without drinking, I know what it is like, it is happy, joyous and free!!!
Hang in there, what ever way you stop drinking you will feel better, it is a beginning to a new life if you work at it.
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 363
Congratulations on your decision, Chronos.
I'm not sure if you've read this thread: http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-expect.html
Detox can be rough, antabuse or not. Your doctor can help you through this.
But, the really hard part is usually over in a few days. After that, with continued abstinence the benefits really begin to pile up.
Good luck to you
Ron
I'm not sure if you've read this thread: http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-expect.html
Detox can be rough, antabuse or not. Your doctor can help you through this.
But, the really hard part is usually over in a few days. After that, with continued abstinence the benefits really begin to pile up.
Good luck to you
Ron
.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Frederick MD
Posts: 36
I appreciate the responses. This is tougher than I thought. So far am experiencing:
-naseaua
-anxiety
-irritability
-like weird aches/pains in my lower back
why I wonder is my stomach sick from NOT drinking?
-naseaua
-anxiety
-irritability
-like weird aches/pains in my lower back
why I wonder is my stomach sick from NOT drinking?
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Murrieta, Ca
Posts: 2,683
Hang in there !
Did you call a Doctor ?
You've still got at least a couple of days.
Funny about the upset stomach. I used to get naseous when my BAL dropped, only a drink would fix it. Go figure.
Did you call a Doctor ?
You've still got at least a couple of days.
Funny about the upset stomach. I used to get naseous when my BAL dropped, only a drink would fix it. Go figure.
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: SC
Posts: 43
I last drank on Sunday and today I felt a little sick, almost like I was coming down with something.... did feel a little achy and stomach was a little messed up.... am wondering if its withdrawal?
I am drinking a lot of water with lemon right now.
I quit for a week a few months ago and felt no symptoms at all that I can recall. Oh well.
Im in a similar boat as you, Chronos, and feel the same way about AA. I went a few times, and didnt dislike it. Im just not a joiner, never have been. I cant commit to a thing, not my church, or school/college, or even jobs or friendships. Oh well. Hang in there!
I am drinking a lot of water with lemon right now.
I quit for a week a few months ago and felt no symptoms at all that I can recall. Oh well.
Im in a similar boat as you, Chronos, and feel the same way about AA. I went a few times, and didnt dislike it. Im just not a joiner, never have been. I cant commit to a thing, not my church, or school/college, or even jobs or friendships. Oh well. Hang in there!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: some where / no where
Posts: 1,019
Hang in there, Chronos!
Good move on your decision to quit. It would be a good idea to see your doctor. Keep drinking lots of water. Detox is unpleasant, but it doesn't last forever. Just think about how great it will be to be able to sleep without drinking a bunch of beer! Once your system gets used to being alcohol free, you'll probably start enjoying more refreshing sleep. I found that I enjoyed more REM deep sleep... and wild, vivid dreams.
Keep working on recovery. You've come to the right place for support.
You can do this!!!
chip
Good move on your decision to quit. It would be a good idea to see your doctor. Keep drinking lots of water. Detox is unpleasant, but it doesn't last forever. Just think about how great it will be to be able to sleep without drinking a bunch of beer! Once your system gets used to being alcohol free, you'll probably start enjoying more refreshing sleep. I found that I enjoyed more REM deep sleep... and wild, vivid dreams.
Keep working on recovery. You've come to the right place for support.
You can do this!!!
chip
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Chronos physically the first 3-5 days are the worst, once you get past the physical part then you really face the beast!
The obsession returns, the beast will really start messing with your head, sometimes it will blatantly tell you to pick up, it will scream to you that you really do not have a problem, that obviously it does not control you because you have not had a drink in XX days so you are fine. Other times it will go into it's stealth mode and unless you are very careful you will find yourself with a half empty drink in your hand wondering "How in the hell did it happen again?" The beast sits in wait...... looking for that ***** in your armor, with me it was anger, I was 2 months in and doing great, I had one heck of a day both at work and on a personal note and when the 5th thing bad happened that day I snapped!!!! Out loud I said "F#&@ I am getting a beer!" The beast literaly roared in my head, that old mental need for alcohol came back with a force that scared me, if I had had a beer in my truck I know I would have opened it!
I drove the rest of the way home repeating the first line of the Serenity prayer over and over again "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change". The BB says that there will come a day when the only thing that stands between you and a drink will be your HP, well that was the day for me. I went into the house and immediatley called one of my AA folks and shared it with him, simply having him there to talk to kicked the beast out of my head, God had got me home, my network had knocked the beast out for the time being.
I am so thankful that I do not have to walk this walk alone, the hope, strength and experience I draw upon from AA fellowship, the power granted me by my HP and the support of my family sustain me.
I, nor you are alone as long as we are willing to reach out for help when we need it.
The obsession returns, the beast will really start messing with your head, sometimes it will blatantly tell you to pick up, it will scream to you that you really do not have a problem, that obviously it does not control you because you have not had a drink in XX days so you are fine. Other times it will go into it's stealth mode and unless you are very careful you will find yourself with a half empty drink in your hand wondering "How in the hell did it happen again?" The beast sits in wait...... looking for that ***** in your armor, with me it was anger, I was 2 months in and doing great, I had one heck of a day both at work and on a personal note and when the 5th thing bad happened that day I snapped!!!! Out loud I said "F#&@ I am getting a beer!" The beast literaly roared in my head, that old mental need for alcohol came back with a force that scared me, if I had had a beer in my truck I know I would have opened it!
I drove the rest of the way home repeating the first line of the Serenity prayer over and over again "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change". The BB says that there will come a day when the only thing that stands between you and a drink will be your HP, well that was the day for me. I went into the house and immediatley called one of my AA folks and shared it with him, simply having him there to talk to kicked the beast out of my head, God had got me home, my network had knocked the beast out for the time being.
I am so thankful that I do not have to walk this walk alone, the hope, strength and experience I draw upon from AA fellowship, the power granted me by my HP and the support of my family sustain me.
I, nor you are alone as long as we are willing to reach out for help when we need it.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Frederick MD
Posts: 36
2nd full day.
Anxiety equal=really bad today. That dull pain caused me to look up things at work all day long....have come to find it is either fatty liver expanding or kidney stones (or pulled muscle)....didn't know if you became so dehydrated from drinking that kidney stones could happen. I have never drank so much water before (*yesterday/today).
Anxiety equal=really bad today. That dull pain caused me to look up things at work all day long....have come to find it is either fatty liver expanding or kidney stones (or pulled muscle)....didn't know if you became so dehydrated from drinking that kidney stones could happen. I have never drank so much water before (*yesterday/today).
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 363
Hi Chronos, well done on your 2nd day!
Seeing your doc might be a good idea. A simple blood test can check for liver issues.
Dehydration is common. I found I drank more than I ever had(Not alcohol I mean). I found that diluted sports drinks really helped. Also, a multi-B vitamin can help. You may not feel like eating but try to eat a small meal every 2 hours or so. The worst for me was over by the third day.
It gets better, just hang in there.
Ron
Seeing your doc might be a good idea. A simple blood test can check for liver issues.
Dehydration is common. I found I drank more than I ever had(Not alcohol I mean). I found that diluted sports drinks really helped. Also, a multi-B vitamin can help. You may not feel like eating but try to eat a small meal every 2 hours or so. The worst for me was over by the third day.
It gets better, just hang in there.
Ron
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