gypsytears

Earlybird, thank you so much for your advice. It is much appreciated. If this is based on your own personal journey, I am truly happy for you.

I am keeping an open mind to all suggestions and I will continue on with my sobriety now...OK?

came2believe

hi,
Congrats on your 30 days! That is a huge step.

I have to respectfully disagree with the idea of making any drastic steps on your marriage (as in, ending it) so early in your sobriety. Right now I would keep focused on staying sober. The world will look a lot different several months even a year from now. I have always heard the advice not to make ANY major life changes before 1 year sobriety. I got a dog before my one year and even THAT was a decision that would have been better made later in sobriety!

What didn't you like about the women's meeting?

gypsytears

Thank you came2 believe .

With regards to the marital situation... thank you for your advice. Unfortunately, if he decides it's over, there's not much for me to do about that except to accept it. Right now... as of today we're doing better than the past week was. He's here, we're talking as opposed to fighting and it's OK, at least for today.

The women's meeting just wasn't my cuppa tea, or coffee. Feeling comfortable, the ages of the group, the "rules" that they have for their group. I don't know... a bunch of stuff. I do like some of the other meetings that I've been to though.

hope3

Gypsy, i think you are doing great, seek and
yee shall find your answers.I try to keep an
open mind too, for; the mind is like an
umbrella, it only works when it is open.
I wish you the very best.

gypsytears

Thanks Hope...

Someone at my group decribed my attitude regarding my recovery as a "search and destroy mission".

I don't know about that... but so far I feel it's working for me. I'm not drinking and I'll have 5 weeks tomorrow.

mcdo1268

I cant drink, and I cant not drink…that’s a dilemma…lack of power…until I recognize this truth about me, there is no need for a higher power…Once I admit this truth…then i become willing to discover this higher power through the remaining eleven steps. And that power will do for me what I can NOT do for myself…and the work goes on, because I will drink again if I stop…powerless over alcohol.....

gr8ful_ed

I was powerless over alcohol. Maybe you aren't. Not everybody is. If you find that you have power over alcohol, then why would you have to accept the first step? And if you find that you don't have that power, then you've already accepted it.

You asked if you're fooling yourself. Hey, if drinking has been destructive for you, and you're free from the desire for a drink, that's sanity. Fooling yourself would be doing the same thing as before and expecting different results.

If you find the insanity of the drink obsession returning despite your efforts, then there's a solution. If you don't, then you already have a solution!

CarolD

Welcome to the SR Alcoholism Forum mcdo1268

Thanks for sharing with us!

hope3

GT, I am on a positive mental attitude trip, so I would rather call
the "search and destroy mission" a problem solving mission. For if
you are planning steps and putting into action your plans to solve a
problem, there kind of isn't a problem anymore. You are to busy
to dwell on the problem, I hope this makes sense to you, if not
let me know and I will try to reword it.
P.S. congratulations early on your 5th week of sobriety. This was
my 20th day, and I hope I am always trying to catch up to you. That
would mean you didn't relapse. Later,

gypsytears

Thanks Hope3. I got the meaning of your post... no need to re-word . 21 days today = 3 weeks for you. That is awesome!

mthhilly

hi glad ur doin well and massive congrats on the 3 week mark u shud feel very proud keep goin lololololol




love and best wishes mick xx

hope3

Hi Mick, and thank-you. You are kicking behind yourself,
I've been reading some of your post and congrats on your
dedication to a happier and healthier life. See you around the
boards, Best wishes Sharon L. alias Hope3.

gypsytears

Well... we didn't make an appointment for marriage counselling this week. It would've been tonight. Probably just as well after the fireworks of it last week.

mthhilly

i really do hope u find a way to work ur probs out sweetheart ........be strong xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

mick xxxxxxxxxx

gypsytears

I'm being as strong as I can mick... thanks . Hubby and I are getting along... problems aren't gone... but at least it's back to being able to speak to each other. I didn't drink over it, and I can safely say I won't use this as an excuse to go back to being f'd up.

Tazman53

gypsy glad to hear things are going better, being sober makes dealing with things both good and bad so much easier for me as I am sure you are finding out as well. gypsy I occasionaly do a little inventory to help me stay sober, I grab a sheet of paper and pen then proceed write down every good thing in life that drinking has led me to in one column, in the other column I write down every good thing that has happened to me sober.

I have yet if I am being totally honest with myself found one good thing that drinking has given me...... I am not talking about getting a buzz as a good thing, because over the years the buzz was lost.

I have also noticed another funny thing being sober, I some how keep finding money in my wallet that normally wasn't there at the end of the week when I was drinking!

gypsytears

Words of wisdom Taz... yes, I should make a list.

I also need a new wallet... mine isn't as generous as yours !