Question from an Al Anon
Southern through and through
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: In.....trouble :-)
Posts: 1,453
Question from an Al Anon
Is it considered okay for me to call my daughter's sponsor? Now hold on a minute. All you AA'ers don't freak out on me...
I don't want to talk to her about my daughter's sobriety or to tell her how I THINK my daughter should should work her program. I would like to get to know her since she is having SUCH an effect on my daughter's life and just learn where she is coming from. Plus I'd like to ask her what, if anything, I could be doing (besides working my Al Anon program) to help ALL of us. Maybe she could help me understand this better from the A's standpoint. I know my daughter doesn't like talking to me about it very much right now. Of course, I'd tell my daughter I wanted to talk to the sponsor. Or is it possible to talk with sponsor without the sponsor telling my daughter? I don't know what would be best. I have no desire to be sneaky about it.
But I repeat (but I bet ya'll don't believe this... ) I DON'T want to work her program. Heck, I can't work her program. I know that. Been in Al Anon long enough to have had that one sink in...
I don't want to talk to her about my daughter's sobriety or to tell her how I THINK my daughter should should work her program. I would like to get to know her since she is having SUCH an effect on my daughter's life and just learn where she is coming from. Plus I'd like to ask her what, if anything, I could be doing (besides working my Al Anon program) to help ALL of us. Maybe she could help me understand this better from the A's standpoint. I know my daughter doesn't like talking to me about it very much right now. Of course, I'd tell my daughter I wanted to talk to the sponsor. Or is it possible to talk with sponsor without the sponsor telling my daughter? I don't know what would be best. I have no desire to be sneaky about it.
But I repeat (but I bet ya'll don't believe this...
) I DON'T want to work her program. Heck, I can't work her program. I know that. Been in Al Anon long enough to have had that one sink in... 
Paused
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Central Florida
Posts: 18
Hi Hangin' In,
I agree with everything that Nadoboy said. Sobriety, especially if it is new, can be a fragile thing. I think that just being grateful right now and let the two of them work is the best approach. Your daughter may share with you but it will have to be in her own time. She should be allowed to make that decision without any prompting from anyone. Right now, she is probably learning things that are new and possibly uncomfortable to her. This is normal and is part of our growth.
You are already doing the best thing for her through Al-Anon. This is a time where each of you has the incredible opportunity to concentrate totally on yourselves. All trust should be placed with your higher power.
Blessings to you,
Recovering
I agree with everything that Nadoboy said. Sobriety, especially if it is new, can be a fragile thing. I think that just being grateful right now and let the two of them work is the best approach. Your daughter may share with you but it will have to be in her own time. She should be allowed to make that decision without any prompting from anyone. Right now, she is probably learning things that are new and possibly uncomfortable to her. This is normal and is part of our growth.
You are already doing the best thing for her through Al-Anon. This is a time where each of you has the incredible opportunity to concentrate totally on yourselves. All trust should be placed with your higher power.
Blessings to you,
Recovering
Moderator
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Leaving Sparta
Posts: 2,912
Dear Hangin 'In.
Calling your daughter's sponsor may not be such a good idea right now.
If your daughter has not asked you to do so I really dont see what calling her sponsor is going to accomplish.
Recovery for all of us requires Trust,Faith,Acceptance and Humility.
Calling your own friends in Alanon may be a wiser option.
Peter.
Calling your daughter's sponsor may not be such a good idea right now.
If your daughter has not asked you to do so I really dont see what calling her sponsor is going to accomplish.
Recovery for all of us requires Trust,Faith,Acceptance and Humility.
Calling your own friends in Alanon may be a wiser option.
Peter.
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