Dave42001

Daily Reflections

A.A.'s FREEDOMS

We trust that we already know what our several freedoms
truly are; that no future generation of AAs will ever
feel compelled to limit them. Our AA freedoms create the
soil in which genuine love can grow. . . .
LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 303

I craved freedom. First, freedom to drink; later, freedom
from drink. The A.A. program of recovery rests on a
foundation of free choice. There are no mandates, laws
or commandments. A.A.'s spiritual program, as outlined
in the Twelve Steps, and by which I am offered even
greater freedoms, is only suggested. I can take it or
leave it. Sponsorship is offered, not forced, and I
come and go as I will. It is these and other freedoms
that allow me to recapture the dignity that was crushed
by the burden of drink, and which is so dearly needed
to support an enduring sobriety.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

You get the power to overcome drinking through the
fellowship of other alcoholics who have found the way
out. You get power by honestly sharing your past
experience by a personal witness. You get power by
coming to believe in a Higher Power, the Divine Principle
in the universe which can help you. You get power by
working with other alcoholics. In these four ways,
thousands of alcoholics have found all the power they
needed to overcome drinking. Am I ready and willing to
accept this power and work for it?

Meditation For The Day

The power of God's spirit is the greatest power in the
universe. Our conquest of each other, the great kings



and conquerors, the conquest of wealth, the leaders of
the money society, all amount to very little in the end.
But one that conquers oneself is greater than one who
conquers a city. Material things have no permanence. But
God's spirit is eternal. Everything really worth while



in the world is the result of the power of God's spirit.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may open myself to the power of God's spirit.
I pray that my relationships with others may be improved
by this spirit.

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As Bill Sees It

Room For Improvement, p. 86

We have come to believe that A.A.'s recovery Steps and Traditions
represent the approximate truths which we need for our particular



purpose. The more we practice them, the more we like them. So there
is little doubt that A.A. principles will continue to be advocated in the
form they stand now.

If our basics are so firmly fixed as all this, then what is there left to
change or to improve?

The answer will immediately occur to us. While we need not alter our
truths, we can surely improve their applications to ourselves, to A.A. as



a whole, and to our relation with the world around us. We can
constantly step up the practice of "these principles in all our affairs."

Grapevine, February 1961

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Walk in Dry Places

If it works, don't fix it.
Accepting life.
A lot of things in life are all right just as they are. This is hard to understand in a world that puts high value on improvement and progress, but since there are so many things that do need fixing, it's best not to tamper with things that are working.
Sometimes we think something should be changed in another person's life. Two AA members decided, for example, that a mutual AA friend deserved higher status employment than what he was doing. They seized upon an unusual profession that seemed to fit his talents and interests, and were disappointed and even a bit offended when he decided he wasn't interested. He continued to follow his regular trade until his retirement thirty years later.
In truth, there had really been nothing that needed "fixing" in his choice of a vocation. He had been earning a living doing very honest but difficult work. It was somewhat presumptuous of his friends to outline a new career for him, and it could have led to considerable harm.



Let's leave people and things alone unless our help is requested and something really does need fixing.
I'll look around today and notice the things in my life that are working well and really don't need changing. Then I'll focus my attention on the things that really should be fixed.

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Keep It Simple

The secret success is constancy of purpose. --- Benjamin Disraeli
In Twelve Step meetings, we don't talk about counseling, treatment centers, or non-program reading. Many of us have been helped in these ways, but we shouldn't confuse them with Twelve Step programs. We must keep our Twelve Step programs pure, no matter what is in style among counselors or at treatment centers, or what the latest books say. Certainly, we should use these sources if they help us, but not in our program meetings. There, we must stick to the basics that have helped addicts recover all over the world for many years. Steps, traditions, meetings, sponsorship---these things work, no matter what is in style.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, let me be there to help an addict in need, by sharing my Twelve Step program.



Action for the Day: I will help out today be being a sponsor or by calling a new member, just to say hello.

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Each Day a New Beginning

It takes time, love, and support to find peace with the restless one. --Deidra Sarault
Restlessness is born of frustration. Perhaps we want to move ahead with our lives more quickly. Does a job have us trapped? Do past troubles haunt us still? Maybe perfectionism tarnishes every attempt to achieve. We can learn from our restlessness, if we let it guide us to our inner reservoir of peace and spiritual support.
The search for serenity often takes us farther from it. We mistakenly think a different job or home or relationship will answer all our needs. But we find that our restlessness has accompanied us to our new surroundings. Peace has its home within. And prayer opens the door to it. In the stillness of our patience, we are privy to its blessing.
Restlessness indicates our distance from our higher power. It may be time for a change in our lives. Change is good; however, our relationship with God will vouchsafe any needed changes. Restlessness is self-centered and will only hamper the steps we may need to take.
Restlessness is a barometer that reveals my spiritual health. Perhaps prayer is called for today.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 10 - To Employers

I well remember the shock I received when a prominent doctor in Chicago told me of cases where pressure of the spinal fluid actually ruptured the brain. No wonder an alcoholic is strangely irrational. Who wouldn’t be, with such a fevered brain? Normal drinkers are not so affected, nor can they understand the aberrations of the alcoholic.

p. 140

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

EMPTY ON THE INSIDE - She grew up around A.A. and had all the answers--except when it came to her own life.

By the end of two weeks of drinking, nobody was speaking to me, so I headed south, where I was sure they all missed me. There was no homecoming parade. People barely remembered me, and by the end of a week, I was out of money. I couldn't even book a plane ticket home. I had less than one dollar, and I had one of those hangovers. I knew if I tried to sit in the airport bar long enough for someone to buy me a drink, it would be obvious that was my intent, and my pride couldn't bear the thought of being asked to leave. I briefly considered mugging a little old lady and stealing her purse, but I knew I would end up picking on the one who was still in shape.

p. 517

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Two - "For our group purpose, there is but one ultimate authority - a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience."

This brings us straight to the question "Does A.A. have a real leadership?" Most emphatically the answer is "Yes, notwithstanding the apparent lack of it." Let's turn again to the deposed founder and his friends. What becomes of them? As their grief and anxiety wear away, a subtle change begins. Ultimately, they divide into two classes known in A.A. slang as "elder statesmen" and "bleeding deacons." The elder statesman is the one who sees the wisdom of the group's decision, who holds no resentment over his reduced status, whose judgment, fortified by considerable experience, is sound, and who is willing to sit quietly on the sidelines patiently awaiting developments. The bleeding deacon is one who is just as surely convinced that the group cannot get along without him, who constantly connives for reelection to office, and who continues to be consumed with self-pity. A few hemorrhage so badly that - drained of all A.A. spirit and principal - they get drunk. At times the A.A. landscape seems to be littered with bleeding forms. Nearly every oldtimer in our Society has gone through this process in some degree. Happily, most of them survive and live to become elder statesmen. They become the real and permanent leadership of A.A. Theirs is the quiet opinion, the sure knowledge and humble example that resolve a crisis. When sorely perplexed, the group inevitably turns to them for advice. They become the voice of the group conscience; in fact, these are the true voice of Alcoholics Anonymous. They do not drive by mandate; they lead by example. This is the experience which has led us to the conclusion that our group conscience, well-advised by its elders, will be in the long run wiser than any single leader.

pp. 134-135

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God, help me let go of my need to create drama to have a life.
--Melody Beattie

Be quicker with a compliment than words that criticize. Kindness builds
you up. Meanness cuts you down in size.
--Terri

He will take it all, if you just learn to give... Put it in God's Hands...
and you will start to live!
--Lori W.

You dwell always in the heart of God.
--John-Roger

"We don't ask God for too much; in fact, we ask for too little. Turn to
Him for everything. Give everything to God."
--Marianne Williamson

Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

GUILT

"It is all one to me if a man
comes from Sing Sing or
Harvard. We hire a man not his
history."
-- Henry Ford

So often we can get so locked into our history --- what we did, what we
said, the events of which we were ashamed --- that we miss the gift of the
new day.

Those of us who suffer from the disease of addiction need to deal with
past problems but not live in them. Our attitude towards today need not



be based on what happened yesterday. Today is the beginning of the rest
of our lives. Today I know that I create most of the pain and tragedy in
my life, but I also know that I create the joys and successes. I am
confident that my sobriety makes me a winner.

Lord, I forgive myself for yesterday and look forward to the healing that
comes with today.

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"Agree with God, and be at peace; in this way good will come to you."
Job 22:21

"I am he who comforts you."
Isaiah 51:12

"God is able to provide you with every blessing in abundance, so that by
always having enough of everything, you may share abundantly in every
good work."
2 Corinthians 9:8

"The joy of the Lord is your strength."
Nehemiah 8:10

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Daily Inspiration

Be wise enough to thank God for not giving you some of the things you've asked for and gracious enough to gratefully enjoy what He gave you in its place. Lord, You know better than I what is right and best for me.

If you are not happy with what you have, how will you be happy with what you want to have? Lord, may I appreciate the good things in my life and refuse to feel sorry for myself or compare myself to others.




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NA Just For Today

Looking For The Assets

"In accordance with the principles of recovery we try not to judge, stereotype, or moralize with each other"
Basic Text p. 11

How many times in our recovery have we misunderstood the behavior of another, immediately formed a judgment, applied a label, and neatly tucked the individual into a pigeonhole? Perhaps they had developed a different understanding of a Power greater than themselves than we had, so we concluded their beliefs were unspiritual. Or maybe we saw a couple having an argument; we assumed their relationship was sick, only to find out later that their marriage had prospered for many years.

Thoughtlessly tossing our fellows into categories saves us the effort of finding out anything about them. Every time we judge the behavior of another, we cease to see them as potential friends and fellow travelers on the road to recovery. If we happened to ask those we are judging if they appreciate being stereotyped, we would receive a resounding "no" in response. Would we feel slighted if this were done to us? Yes, indeed. Our best qualities are what we want others to notice. In the same way, our fellow recovering addicts want to be well thought of. Our program of recovery asks us to look positively at life. The more we concentrate on the positive qualities in others, the more we'll notice them in ourselves.

Just for today: I will set aside my negative judgments of others, and concentrate instead on appreciating the favorable qualities in all.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
We like someone because, we love someone although. --Henri de Montherlant
Families are like scissors. They are joined in the middle but often spread wide apart, moving away from each other. When we're not feeling close to other family members--when it's hard even to like them--it seems as though we'll never come together again.
But pity the scrap of paper that comes between our scissor blades! The scissors works together again and slices the trouble clean. When trouble threatens our family, we can slice it through if we move together in love and acceptance.
No matter our small differences, we are part of the same living organism, in a way. The family we live in has been together for many generations, and we are just the most recent members. When we look at one another, we see the products of centuries of love.
When I feel distant from my family, can I locate where we are still joined together?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Man is in love
And loves what vanishes;
What more is there to say?
--W. B. Yeats
Throughout our lives we repeatedly make attachments and lose them. We are taken with the rich color of leaves in the fall, but we know that this beauty will soon be replaced with stark, empty branches. We give ourselves to caring for a baby, knowing someday this person will say good bye to make his or her own life. We lie close to our lover in a special moment, yet we know that this, too, will be limited by the years of our lives.
We want to defiantly say, "No! If I can't have permanence I'll take nothing at all!" Most of us have wished we could outmaneuver life with such a power play. The loss feels so painful we might think holding back our love will save us pain. But holding back brings a greater unhappiness. When we submit to it, life is generous in its kaleidoscope of forms. Each attachment, each loss, is followed by more rewards and attachments. Loss and death itself are part of life. There is peace in accepting and living fully in the cycle of seasons.
God, help me to engage with life fully and to accept change.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
It takes time, love, and support to find peace with the restless one. --Deidra Sarault
Restlessness is born of frustration. Perhaps we want to move ahead with our lives more quickly. Does a job have us trapped? Do past troubles haunt us still? Maybe perfectionism tarnishes every attempt to achieve. We can learn from our restlessness, if we let it guide us to our inner reservoir of peace and spiritual support.
The search for serenity often takes us farther from it. We mistakenly think a different job or home or relationship will answer all our needs. But we find that our restlessness has accompanied us to our new surroundings. Peace has its home within. And prayer opens the door to it. In the stillness of our patience, we are privy to its blessing.
Restlessness indicates our distance from our higher power. It may be time for a change in our lives. Change is good; however, our relationship with God will vouchsafe any needed changes. Restlessness is self-centered and will only hamper the steps we may need to take.
Restlessness is a barometer that reveals my spiritual health. Perhaps prayer is called for today.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
After Burn
How could I do it? How could I say it? Even though I meant it, I still feel ashamed, guilty, and afraid.
This is common reaction to new, exciting recovery behaviors. Anything to do with owning our power and taking care of ourselves can trigger feelings of shame, guilt, and fear.
We do not have to allow these feelings to control us. They're a backlash. They're after burn. Let them burn out.
When we start confronting and attacking feelings and messages, we will experience some after burn. The after burn is what we allowed to control us all our life - shame and guilt.
Many of us grew up with shame-based messages that it wasn't okay to take care of ourselves, be honest, be direct, and own our power with people. Many of us grew up with messages that it wasn't okay to be who we were and resolve problems in relationships. Many of us grew up with the message that what we want and need isn't okay.
Let it all burn off. We don't have to take after burn so seriously. We don't let the after burn convince us that we are wrong and don't have a right to take care of ourselves and set boundaries.
Do we really have the right to take care of ourselves? Do we really have the right to set boundaries? Do we really have the right to be direct and say what we need to say?
You bet we do.
Today, I will let any after burn which sets in after I practice a new recovery behavior, burn off. I will not take it so seriously. God, help me let go of my shame and needless fears about what will happen to me if I really start caring for and loving myself.


I am good enough...just the way I am. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Resentments Hurt Everybody

Resentments only hurt ourselves. Not true. Resentments can hurt others,too.

When we brood and allow resentments to brew and fester, we send negative, mean, hurtful, spiteful energy to others. The more consciously and vividly we do this, the more pain we can cause everyone. The more bonded we are with others, whether they’re business associates, friends, lovers, or family members, the more powerfully our resentments can impact them as well as us.

So if you’re busy thinking resentful thoughts about someone close to you on the job or at home, consider the harm you are doing to him or her. The more powerful the emotions connected to these thoughts and the closer you are to the person, the more damage you can do. You can sabotage the other person, help keep him or her down. Even if you don’t speak your resentments aloud, even if you try to hide the way you feel, the energy is there in the air hurting both of you, just as we focus on clearing the air we breathe of toxins, we need to cleanse the air around us at work and at home from the toxic fumes of resentment.

Remember, when we harbor hate, jealousy, or rage, we connect to others in ways that hurt us all. Let’s set others free. Let’s release our resentments. Along the way, we’ll set ourselves and our hearts free,too.

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More Language Of Letting Go

Set yourself free

I’ll let go tomorrow; I’m having too much fun torturing myself today. No, that’s not really it. I’ll let go tomorrow; the things I’m holding on to need me to hold them today. Yes, that’s closer to what it is. I’m not enjoying myself at all today, but I have to keep holding on to my desires, my guilt, my limitations, and my worries. I am defined by them. And you want me to let go of them today? Sorry, maybe tomorrow. And so we hold on. And the ulcer grows. And the pain in our hearts from unfulfilled expectations keeps gnawing away at us. What we’re really putting off is the freedom we get from letting go.

Yes, I know that what you’re holding on to is important. Everything that I have ever had to let go of was important to me, too. If it wasn’t important, letting go wouldn’t be a struggle. We’d just put it down and walk away.

You’ve been given today. Will you use it or will you miss out on today’s wonder because you’re to preoccupied with holding on to things that are beyond your control?

God, help me let go,today.

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In God’s Care

I do not believe one can settle how much we ought to give. I am afraid the only safe rule is to give more than we can spare.
~~C.C. Lewis

In this hectic life, demands are constantly made on us–demands on our time, our attention, our skills. There are demands on all our resources, both spiritual and material. How can we meet all the demands? When we try, aren’t we in danger of spreading ourselves too thin and not being able to satisfy anybody, including ourselves?

We learn, though, both from God and from experience, that the secret of happiness is in giving. It is the heart and soul of our spiritual life. We are always happiest when we are giving–of ourselves, our possessions, our money, our time, our attention, our tolerance, our patience, our appreciation, and our love.

It is hard to give too much. The more we give of ourselves, the more we give to ourselves.

I will give as much as I can, and a little bit more.

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Doing for Others
Solace in Service

by Madisyn Taylor

So many times, when we are being of service to others, we find the answer or solution to our own problems.


When we feel bad, often our first instinct is to isolate ourselves and focus on what’s upsetting us. Sometimes we really do need some downtime, but many times the best way to get out of the blues quickly is to turn our attention to other people. In being of service to others, paradoxically, we often find answers to our own questions and solutions to our own problems. We also end up feeling more connected to the people around us, as well as empowered by the experience of helping someone.

When we reach out to people we can help, we confirm that we are not alone in our own need for support and inspiration, and we also remind ourselves that we are powerful and capable in certain ways. Even as our own problems or moods get the better of us sometimes, there is always someone else who can use our particular gifts and energy to help them out. They, in turn, remind us that we are not the only people in the world with difficulties or issues. We all struggle with the problems of life, and we all feel overwhelmed from time to time, but we can almost always find solace in service.

In the most ideal situation, the person we are helping sheds light on our own dilemma, sometimes with a direct piece of advice, and sometimes without saying anything at all. Sometimes just the act of getting our minds out of the obsessive mode of trying to figure out what to do about our own life does the trick. Many great inventors and artists have found that the inspiration they need to get to the next level in their work comes not when they’re working but when they’re walking around the block or doing dishes. We do ourselves and everyone else a great service when we take a break from our sorrows and extend ourselves to someone in need. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Storing up grievances is not only a waste of time, but a waste of life that could be lived to greater satisfaction. If I keep a ledger of “oppressions and indignities,” I’m only restoring them to painful reality.

“The horror of that moment” the King said, “*I shall never, never forget.”
“You will though,” said the Queen, “if you don’t make a memorandum of it.”
(Lewis Carroll. Through The Looking Glass)

Am I keeping a secret storehouse for the wreckage of my past?

Today I Pray

God keep me from harboring the sludge from the past — grievances, annoyances, grudges, oppressions, wrongs, injustices, putdown,s slights, hurts. They will nag at me and consume my time in rehashing what I “might have said” or done until I face each one, name the emotion it produced in me, settle it a best I can — and forget it. May I empty my storehouse of old grievances.

Today I Will Remember

Don’t rattle old bones.

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One More Day

Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.
– Plautus

We are used to the quick fix. Candy bars hold back our hunger. Credit cards allow us to spend freely when we are financially strapped. We drive through the fast-food lanes and eat on the way to our next stop.

And when we were told about our illness, our reaction may have been, “Okay, Now how can it be fixed?” We were told that part of the treatment was time, a remedy requiring patience and one difficult to accept. We are learning to accept that the nature of our illness requires us to be patient. We can use this patience to slow the value of each passing minute. Our time becomes more and more precious as we understand that patience is a very good remedy.

Today I can begin to practice patience.

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Food For Thought

Finding Our Place

I did not create this world, nor did I create myself. I do not know what the outcome of my life will be, or even what will happen to me next week. If I try to manipulate reality and arrange circumstances to suit myself, I become frustrated and unhappy I cannot control reality, but I can change myself to be more in harmony with it.

When I accept a food plan and follow it, I am slowly adjusting my body and my appetite to what is best for my health and well-being. I have tried the other way--adjusting my intake of food to the demands of my appetite--and the result is disaster and chaos in my life.

In OA, we follow a program which is sound and which has worked for thousands of compulsive overeaters like ourselves. We stop trying to make everything go according to our desires, and we start learning how to live in the real world. With the guidance of our Higher Power, we find our place.

I trust Your guidance.

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One Day At A Time

Forgiveness

"To err is human, to forgive is divine."
Alexander Pope

When most of us first came into Program, we carried around a great deal of shame, guilt, and resentment. This made it very difficult for us to forgive ourselves, or others, for various past transgressions. We usually must rely on the forgiveness and support of other Program members before we come to a point of being able to truly forgive ourselves.

Coming to the point of self-forgiveness is a crucial step because once we have achieved it for ourselves, we can finally come to the stage of maturity to begin to forgive others. By offering true forgiveness we can begin to release the plethora of harbored resentments that have poisoned our souls and hindered our recovery for so many years.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will work towards learning to forgive myself so that I might eventually learn to forgive others.
Rob R.

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

It works -- it really does. - Pg. 88 - Into Action

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Fragments of our addiction never stop calling, 'Hey, just one won't hurt; look, what's so wrong with going to that party; it's disloyal to stop seeing old friends.' But those of us who've been around awhile recognize the 'callings' for what they are. Give the 'calls' an inch and we KNOW addiction takes a mile.

When my mind is niggled with addiction excuses for setting myself up, may I follow program advice and call my sponsor or counselor.

Life's Generosity

I appreciate the generosity of life. Everywhere I look, the world is spilling forth abundance. I open my hand to receive and the world fills it up with something. Whether it's sunlight, sweet smells or the gift of another day, this world is constantly giving forth. Today I say a quiet thank you for all that the world provides. For sunsets, fresh air and flowers. For rain and people and pets. My arms aren't big enough to hold it all, so today I will appreciate just what I have, knowing that appreciating what I can hold will feel more wonderful than running after more than I can carry.

I feel grateful for the gifts of this world

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Most of our growth in recovery takes time. You may, like many of us, want to be restored to wholeness yesterday. However, you can afford to be patient. After all, when the Universe made time, it made plenty of it.

I give time, time.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Sponsor's question: Who's not doing it your way today?

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I am good enough just the way I am.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Our defects are like the bars of a cage. The central point is not to study the bars, but get out of the cage. - Anon.
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