August252015

Let us know how it goes Tetrax! I like what others have said about remembering that we have as much of a choice in who our sponsor is as does a sponsor about who they want to work with.

I went thru the process of trusting my intuition about changing my first sponsor after step 3 as I wasn't comfortable doing 4 and 5 with her. I DID have to make sure that I wasn't just wanting to get out of doing that work first, tho.

And it's ok to position it as a temporary sponsor deal. I've worked with folks in a bit of that manner, as in having them get a BB, and we start with the first 164 pp. I follow the manner outlined in the book (with some modern concessions like text communication!) and we establish if that person does want to begin the steps at that time. Up to them and I do not chase them - I think I have very reasonable expectations such as one meeting a week face to face, them checking in w me first every day, and discussing the benefits of 90/90 while also factoring in what other commitments they have as well as what other recovery work they are doing such as beginning a Buddhist practice as one of my sponsees did.

You're on what sounds like a terrific path for YOU, which is what ultimately matters most in keeping you sober.

August252015

Oh YEAH! I should also specify that it was day 97 when I got my first sponsor. Certainly not what many suggest as getting one immediately and doing all the steps ASAP. Someone told me early on to listen for those who have what I want, and as I knew I was absolutely committed to AA and essentially started working the steps "internally" as I knew that 1-3 were completely true, felt I needed time to engage. All this is a bit contrary to my typical inclination to jump into any project, but I did trust my HP and growing intuition about this.

It was also right around a year when my second sponsor and I technically finished the steps. We used a workbook. I had been working with her since that summer and step 4 and the best way I can describe our process is that she taught me about applying the spirit of the law (ie the steps) to how I learned to live them. The actual exercise of each step was a process. This worked for me and along the way, encouraged much BB study that laid my foundation.

abgator

This is where I'm at. I'll get a sponsor when I find the right one. In the mean time, there's no reason I can't work on improvement on my own. I even resolved a huge resentment on my own, simply by being motivated by reading the steps. It may still hurt, but I finally got an answer to something that has bothered me greatly for 5 years and I was able to understand and let go.