Daily Readings for Sunday, July 7th
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Daily Readings for Sunday, July 7th
Daily Reflections
. . . AND LETTING GO OF IT
. . . primarily fear that we would lose something we already possessed
or would fail to get something we demanded. Living upon a basis
of unsatisfied demands, we were in a state of continual
disturbance and frustration. Therefore, no peace was to be had
unless we could find a means of reducing these demands. The
difference between a demand and a simple request is plain to
anyone.
12 & 12, p.76
Peace is possible for me only when I let go of expectations. When
I'm trapped in thoughts about what I want and what should be
coming to me, I'm in a state of fear or anxious anticipation and
this is not conducive to emotional sobriety. I must surrender--over
and over--to the reality of my dependence on God, for then I find
peace, gratitude and spiritual security.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We had become hopelessly sick people; spiritually, emotionally,
and physically. The power that controlled us was greater than
ourselves--it was John Barleycorn. Many drinkers have said: "I
hadn't gone that far; I hadn't lost my job on account of drink; I
still had my family; I managed to keep out of jail. True, I took too
much sometimes and I guess I managed to make quite an a$$ of
myself when I did, but I still thought I could control my drinking. I
didn't really believe that I was an alcoholic." If I was one of these,
have I fully changed my mind?
Meditation For The Day
Painful as the present time may be; you will one day see the reason
for it. You will see that it was not only testing, but also a
preparation for the life-work which you are to do. Have faith that
your prayers and aspirations will someday be answered.
Answered in a way that perhaps seems painful to you but is the only
right way. Selfishness and pride often make us want things that
are not good for us. They need to be burned out of our natures.
We must be rid of the blocks which are holding us back, before we
can expect our prayers to be answered.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be willing to go through a time of testing. I pray that
I may trust God for the outcome.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
To Survive Trials, p. 188
In our belief, any scheme of combating alcoholism which proposes wholly to shield the
sick man from temptation is doomed to failure. If the alcoholic tries to shield himself he
may succeed for a time, but he usually winds up with a bigger explosion than ever. We
have tried these methods. These attempts to do the impossible have always failed.
Release from alcohol, and not flight from it, is our answer.
<< << << >> >> >>
"Faith without works is dead." How appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic
fails to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he
cannot survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he does not work, he will surely
drink again, and if he drinks, he will surely die. Then faith will be dead indeed.
Alcoholics Anonymous
1. p. 101
2. pp. 14-15
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
What should I have said or done?
Second thoughts
After an intense discussion, we might rehash what we said and wish we'd said something else. Perhaps some brilliant remark occurs to us long after the conversation has ended.
We can say only what comes to us at the time of the discussion. Our best preparation for any such discussion.... however important.... is to place the matter in God's hands, seeking the highest good for everyone involved.
It may be that the brilliant thoughts coming to us later would have actually been inappropriate. After all, important discussions also involve exchanges of strong feelings that influence the meeting. If our feelings are in line with the high principles of the program, the discussion should go well. In such cases, we will probably say what we're supposed to say.
I'll do my best today without trying to second-guess every word or action.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Be brave enough to accept the help of others
Often is the past, we acted like we didn't need anyone. It takes courage to let others help us.
As we get better, our courage grows. We invite people into our lives. We help others, and we let others help us.
We will learn to let others help us if we work our program. Why? Because we need others to stay sober. When we have a problem, we talk about it in our group. When we need a shoulder to cry on, we call a friend or our sponsor. Over time, our relationships become one of the biggest rewards of recovery.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me see my need for others as a test---a test to see if I’ll be brave enough and wise enough to ask for help when I need it.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list four times in my life when I needed help but didn't ask for it. I'll tell a friend about how these times would have been different if I had asked for help.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
. . . that is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way. --Doris Lessing
As we are changed by our experiences, that which we know also changes. Our experiences foster growth and enlightenment, and all awarenesses give way to new understandings. We are forever students of life blessed with particular lessons designed only for us. There is joy in knowing that learning has no end and that each day offers us a chance to move closer to becoming the persons we are meant to be.
To understand something more deeply requires that we be open to the ideas of others, willing to part with our present opinions. The program offers us many opportunities to trade in the understandings we've outgrown. Throughout our recovery we have discovered new interpretations of old ideas. And we will continue to expand our understanding.
Every situation, every person, every feeling, every idea has a slightly different hue each time we encounter it. The wonder of this is that life is forever enriched, forever fresh.
Each moment offers me a chance to know better who I am and to understand more fully the real contribution that is mine to make in this life. I will let the anticipation of my changing ideas excite me.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
WE AGNOSTICS
Instead, we looked at the human defects of these people, and sometimes used their shortcomings as a basis of wholesale condemnation. We talked of intolerance, while we were intolerant ourselves. We missed the reality and the beauty of the forest because we were diverted by the ugliness of some its trees. We never gave the spiritual side of life a fair hearing.
p. 50
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
ACCEPTANCE WAS THE ANSWER - The physician wasn't hooked, he thought--he just prescribed drugs medically indicated for his many ailments. Acceptance was his key to liberation.
Shakespeare said, "All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players." He forgot to mention that I was the chief critic. I was always able to see the flaw in every person, every situation. And I was always glad to point it out, because I knew you wanted perfection, just as I did. A.A. and acceptance have taught me that there is a bit of good in the worst of us and a bit of bad in the best of us; that we are all children of God and we each have a right to be here. When I complain about me or about you, I am complaining about God's handiwork. I am saying I know better than God.
p. 417
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Foreword
The basic principles of A.A., as they are known today, were borrowed mainly from the fields of religion and medicine, though some ideas upon which success finally depended were the result of noting the behavior and needs of the Fellowship itself.
p. 16
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The way in which we think of ourselves has everything to do with how
our world sees us.
--Arlene Raven
Don't believe everything you think.
--unknown
"Put love first. Entertain thoughts that give life. And when a thought
or resentment, or hurt, or fear comes your way, have another thought
that is more powerful -- a thought that is love."
--Mary Manin Morrissey
"Keep your face to the sunshine of His love and the shadows will fall
behind you."
--unknown
Take a walk with God. He will meet you at the Steps.
--unknown
It's easier to tear a hole than to mend one.
--Russian Proverb
Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.
--unknown
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
RELIGION
"Doubt isn't the opposite of
faith; it is an element of faith."
--Paul Tillich
That part of me that does not know is vibrant in spirituality.
Problems are part of what it is to be human and an element of
doubt is essential. With the doubt comes the growth. However, as
a younger man I was told that it was a sin to doubt; God demanded a
steadfast faith and doubt could have no part of faith! I remember
going to confession and feeling guilty and ashamed about my doubts --
but I did doubt and doubt has always played a part in my life. In some
ways I think that my religious doubts have been the most creative part
of me -- certainly they have enabled me to grow and build a bridge of
understanding with others.
Master, hear, through the doubts, my love of You.
************************************************** *********
Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him; Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass. Cease from anger, and forsake wrath; Do not fret it only causes harm.
Psalm 37:7-8
He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under
the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge
and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust.
Psalm 81:1-2
Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He shall lift you up.
James 4:10
Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye steadfast, unmoveable, always
abounding in the work of the Lord, for as much as ye know that your
labor is not in vain in the Lord.
1 Corinthians 15:58
Blessed is the man who listens to me, watching daily at my doors.
Proverbs 8:34
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Daily Inspiration
Talking about how busy you are only adds stress to the stress you already feel. Lord, help me complete the tasks of my day and avoid taking on more than I can handle.
Rejoice and be happy for others when they are blessed. Lord, bless me with the ability to be free of envy so that I can truly share the joy of my neighbors.
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NA Just For Today
God In Each Other
"One aspect of our spiritual awakening comes through the new understanding of our Higher Power that we develop by sharing another addict's recovery."
Basic Text, p.51
We've heard it said that we often see God most clearly in one another. We see the truth of this when we practice our Twelfth Step. When we carry the recovery message to another addict, we sense the presence of a Power greater than ourselves. And as we watch the message take hold, we realize something else.
It's the message that brings recovery, not the messenger. A Higher Power, not our own power, is the source of the change that begins when we carry the message to a still-suffering addict. As the message does its work, transforming the life of another addict, we see a Higher Power in action. We watch as acceptance and hope replace denial and despair. Before our very eyes, the first traces of honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness begin to appear. Something's happening inside this person, something bigger and more powerful than either of us. We're watching the God we've come to understand at work in someone's life. We see the Higher Power in them. And we know with greater certainty than ever that this Higher Power is in us, too, as the force driving our recovery.
Just for today: As I carry the message of recovery to other addicts, I will try to pay attention to the Power behind the message. Today, as I watch other addicts recover, I will try to recognize the God in them so I can better recognize the God in myself.
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I found words to every thought I ever had, but one. . . . --Emily Dickinson
What kinds of thoughts can't be put into words? We feel lost in space, mind-boggled by how small and big the stars are. We are sure and unsure about death, its blank and steady stare. Or we have done something that makes us feel both good and bad. Sometimes we hate someone we love, but we aren't sure what hate is, or love. We are scared of crowds and afraid of being abandoned, always alone. Sometimes we just want to laugh and cry, and when words fail we expect someone to know what our silences mean.
What are some ways I try to express my feelings without using words?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Those who are mentally and emotionally healthy are those who have learned when to say yes, when to say no, and when to say whoopee! --Willard S. Krabill
We men have fallen into many difficulties because of poorly defined personal boundaries. Some of us never learned to say no to our mothers and felt invaded or ruled by them. Or we never truly said no to our fathers - never went through a teenage rebellion to establish ourselves as adults. Others have gotten stuck saying no and have never learned to yield and say yes.
Boundary problems have been part of the difficulty in many areas of our lives. We've told ourselves we have no right to our yes or no, or we've said we're strong enough to sacrifice for someone else, or we've welcomed the escape from ourselves in discarding our choice. Not saying no when we needed to or not saying yes when we wanted to has led many of us into doctors' offices, courts, jails, lost jobs, divorces, and bad marriages. Now the inner voice of our Higher Power is showing us our limits and encouraging us to stand up for them.
I am learning to know myself by defining my boundaries and choosing when and when not to cross them.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
. . . that is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way. --Doris Lessing
As we are changed by our experiences, that which we know also changes. Our experiences foster growth and enlightenment, and all awarenesses give way to new understandings. We are forever students of life blessed with particular lessons designed only for us. There is joy in knowing that learning has no end and that each day offers us a chance to move closer to becoming the persons we are meant to be.
To understand something more deeply requires that we be open to the ideas of others, willing to part with our present opinions. The program offers us many opportunities to trade in the understandings we've outgrown. Throughout our recovery we have discovered new interpretations of old ideas. And we will continue to expand our understanding.
Every situation, every person, every feeling, every idea has a slightly different hue each time we encounter it. The wonder of this is that life is forever enriched, forever fresh.
Each moment offers me a chance to know better who I am and to understand more fully the real contribution that is mine to make in this life. I will let the anticipation of my changing ideas excite me.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Getting It All Out
Let yourself have a good gripe session. From: " Woman, Sex, and Addiction" -- Charlotte Davis Kasl, Ph.D.
Get it out. Go ahead. Get it all out. Once we begin recovery, we may feel like it's not okay to gripe and complain. We may tell ourselves that if we were really working a good program, we wouldn't need to complain.
What does that mean? We won't have feelings? We won't feel overwhelmed? We won't need to blow off steam or work through some not so pleasant, not so perfect, and not so pretty parts of life?
We can let ourselves get our feelings out, take risks, and be vulnerable with others. We don't have to be all put together, all the time. That sounds more like codependency than recovery.
Getting it all out doesn't mean we need to be victims. It doesn't mean we need to revel in our misery, finding status in our martyrdom. It doesn't mean we won't go on to set boundaries. It doesn't mean we won't take care of ourselves.
Sometimes, getting it all out is an essential part of taking care of ourselves. We reach a point of surrender so we can move forward.
Self-disclosure does not mean only quietly reporting our feelings. It means we occasionally take the risk to share our human side-the side with fears, sadness, hurt, rage, unreasonable anger, weariness, or lack of faith.
We can let our humanity show. In the process, we give others permission to be human too. "Together" people have their not so together moments. Sometimes, falling apart - getting it all out - is how we get put back together.
Today, I will let it all out if I need a release.
Today I let go totally and give God the space to do His work. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Recognize the Signs
Sometimes, the universe gives us warnings.
I was driving down a local highway in New Mexico, a safe distance behind the car in front of me. Suddenly, the driver slammed on his brakes to avoid a huge puddle, a flood of water in front of him. I stopped short, but the car behind me was following too closely and rammed into the rear of my Jeep.
I got out and inspected the damage. My car was fine. The woman who rammed me had dented her bumper. No one was harmed. I got back in my Jeep, thinking it was over. But as I drove off, I began to wonder. Something about the incident still nagged at me.
Several weeks later, I was driving down a fast-moving two-lane highway. Behind me was a large truck loaded with cars. In front of me were several cars. In front of the cars was a school bus. The traffic was moving at at least fifty-five miles an hour.
Suddenly, I saw the brake lights from the cars ahead. The school bus had stopped to let a child disembark. I pulled to a stop behind the car in front of me. Then I remembered the lesson from the accident a couple of weeks ago: sometimes I can stop safely, but the driver behind me can’t.
I looked out my rearview mirror. The truck loaded with cars was frantically trying to stop. I pulled my car off the road onto the shoulder, giving him an extra car length. He screeched to a stop, right behind the car ahead of me. Had I not noticed, not pulled out, we’d all have been piled up. And the children in the bus…
Sometimes accidents happen without warning, but sometimes the universe gives us a nudge, a little sign. We don’t have to become paranoid, we don’t have to think every event means something, but we can trust ourselves to recognize a sign when we see one.
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More Language Of Letting Go
It will get better
Sometimes things need to feel worse before they get better. Feelings are one of those things.
When a feeling comes to the surface, it presents itself boldly. Usually the feelings being stirred up are ones we label unpleasant– fear, hurt, rage, guilt, shame or deep sorrow and grief. They will feel intense, for a while. Some feelings take a moment to come to the surface and clear. Other feelings take more time.
Feeling the emotion that intensely means it’s finally clearing out of your system. Even though it may feel like it, it’s not really getting worse. It’s healing, it’s getting better. You’re cleaning out that old wound. To do that, you have to reopen it, but just for a little while. But finally, after you do that, it will truly heal.
What do you need to do with feelings? Acknowledge them. Feel them. Give each one its due. They like to be honored that way. Once you identify and feel them, then they’ll go away. And each time you do this, the pond becomes clearer and cleaner, until finally the water is pure.
Notice how you react to yourself when a feeling comes up that needs attention and care. Do you spend as much time resisting the feeling as you actually do feeling the emotion? Do you expend more energy than necessary worrying that the feeling won’t leave, that you won’t be able to handle it, or that the feeling will take over your life? Consciously and deliberately relinquish your resistance to your emotional world. In March we learned to say whatever as part of speaking the language of letting go. Now practice saying whatever in love to your feelings.
God, give me the courage to face what I feel now, and what I felt before and didn’t have the resources to feel. Help me trust that this process will help me feel better than I did before.
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Food for Thought
Life Is Opportunity
Each morning when we wake up, we thank our Higher Power for another day of abstaining. Each hour that is given to us is a chance to grow and learn and serve. We can believe that God has a plan for every day that he gives us and that He will reveal the plan step by step as we listen for His guidance.
If we are too intent on carrying out our personal ideas and projects, we may miss the directions that come from God. We need to remain open and flexible so that He may use us as He chooses.
Considering the time and tasks that we have as opportunities to serve saves us from self-centered worry and anxiety. We do not have to be compulsive about our work and activities. God knows our capabilities and will not give us more than we can handle. He is always ready to direct our efforts when we turn to Him.
Thank You for the opportunity to live and serve today.
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A Self-Created State
Worry
Worry is an extension of fear and can also set you up for attracting that which you don’t want in your life.
We have all had the experience of worrying about something at some point in our lives. Some of us have a habitual tendency to worry, and all of us have known someone who is a chronic worrier. Worry is an extension of fear and can be a very draining experience. In order for worry to exist, we have to imagine that something bad might happen. What we are worrying about has not happened yet, however, so this bad thing is by definition a fantasy. Understood this way, worry is a self-created state of needless fear. Still, most of us worry.
One reason we worry is because we feel like we’re not in control. For example, you might worry about your loved ones driving home in bad weather. There is nothing you can do to guarantee their safe passage, but you worry until you find out they have reached their destination unharmed. In this instance, worry is an attempt to feel useful and in control. However, worrying does nothing to ensure a positive outcome and it has an unpleasant effect on your body, mind, and spirit. The good news is that there are ways to transform this kind of worry so that it has a healing effect. Just as worry uses the imagination, so does the antidote to worry. Next time you find that you are worrying, imagine the best result instead of anticipating the worst outcome. Visualize your loved ones’ path bathed in white light and clearly see in your mind’s eye their safe arrival. Imagine angels or guides watching over them as they make their way home. Generate peace and well-being instead of nervousness and unease within yourself.
Another reason we worry is that something that we know is pending but are avoiding is nagging us—an unpaid parking ticket, an upcoming test, an issue with a friend. In these cases, acknowledging that we are worried and taking action is the best solution. If you can confront the situation and own your power to change it, you’ll have no reason to worry. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
What wonderful things could happen in my life if I could get rid of my natural impulse to justify my actions. Is honesty so deeply repr4essed under layers of guilt that I can’t release it to understand my motives? Being honest with ourselves isn’t easy. It’s difficult to search out why I had this or that impulse and, more importantly, why I acted upon it. Nothing makes us feel so vulnerable as to give up the crutch of The Alibi, yet my willingness to be vulnerable will go a long way toward helping me grow in The Program. Am I becoming more aware that self-deception multiplies my problems?
Today I Pray
May God remove my urge to make excuses. Help me to face up to the realities that surface when I am honest with myself. Help me to know, as certainly as day follows sunrise, that my difficulties will be lessened if I can only trust His Will.
Today I Will Remember
I will be willing to do His Will.
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One More Day
Smiles form the channels of a future tear.
– Lord Byron
We have often watched smiles turn to laughter and laughter back to tears. At a family reunion, we hear the joyous sounds of people chattering away, trying to catch up in five minutes for twenty lost years.
People who have Parkinson’s disease sometimes complain that their faces don’t match the emotions they want to express. The mask of the illness slows down normal movement of facial muscles. Even more tragic is the person who doesn’t feel emotion. No laughter and no tears.
We are fortunate to be able to express our emotions, to show contentment and unhappiness. So what if today’s laughter becomes tomorrow’s tears? We know we’ll laugh again — and cry again. Our past experiences give meaning to the present.
I will accept all my emotions as an affirmation of my life. Changing emotions are a part of normal living.
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One Day At A Time
FEAR
“Few persons live up to the faith which they really have.
Unreasoned fear is a master intellectual fraud
practiced upon the evolving mortal soul.”
The Urantia Book
“Unreasoned fear” was my main problem for most of my life. I lived with a myriad of fears which seemed to be too awesome and terrible to face. I love the fact that since finding this recovery program, I no longer have to live in fear. What wondrous freedom I found in the realization that unreasoned fear is “intellectual fraud!”
One slogan I recall about fear says: “Future Events Appear Real.” That is the first one that really helped me to realize that most of my fears were not based on what was real. By working the Steps of this program I have managed to stop attempting to live in a future filled with fear. When I focus on just being here now -- living in this moment only -- I don't have to run from fear.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will stay in this moment. I will look at the people and things that are here right now and enjoy what my Higher Power has given me.
~ Steph
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
When you have carefully explained to such people that he is a sick person, you will have created a new atmosphere. Barriers which have sprung up between you and your friends will disappear with the growth of sympathetic understanding. You will no longer be self-conscious or feel that you must apologize as though your husband were a weak character. He may be anything but that. Your new courage, good nature and lack of self-consciousness will do wonders for you socially. - Pg. 115 - To Wives
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
It is necessary in the beginning to be clean from dry drugs and dry from wet drugs, but it is not all we want to obtain. We want wholeness and we want growth. This comes from living each hour according to the principles we are learning.
My Spiritual Source demonstrates that clean and dry is not my only goal--but growth is.
Dreaming Dreams
Today, I will dream dreams. There is nothing wrong with having a couple of dreams for myself if they are realistic and don't remove me from life too much. To work toward a dream can be a constructive use of my talents and energies. It can give me a positive focus. If my dreams are wild and I am not willing to do the work necessary to realize them, they will only frustrate me and lower my self-esteem. If, however, I am able to dream what makes sense for me and work to put it within my reach, it can be a real process of growth and challenge. My energy and enthusiasm can help me move through blocks, and my commitment can show me that love and effort can be their own reward.
I can stretch myself.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Deal with the small stuff or it will deal with you. Do not allow the small stuff to pile up on the camel's back. Take each situation that bothers you and deal with that as one unit, not as the straw that breaks the camel's back.
When I feel it, I deal with it and then can heal from it.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Do your Third Step every morning and turn your will over to the care of the God of your understanding. At night, take a Tenth Step to see how God's doing.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I let go totally and give God the space to do His work.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
A man was walking on a beach after a storm. Thousands of starfish were stranded on the shore. He saw a boy throwing starfish back into the ocean and asked the boy why. The boy replied: 'The tide's going out, the starfish will die in the sun. The man said; 'But there's so many of them, what difference can it make? The boy threw another starfish and said : It'll make a difference to that one.' Anon.
__________________
. . . AND LETTING GO OF IT
. . . primarily fear that we would lose something we already possessed
or would fail to get something we demanded. Living upon a basis
of unsatisfied demands, we were in a state of continual
disturbance and frustration. Therefore, no peace was to be had
unless we could find a means of reducing these demands. The
difference between a demand and a simple request is plain to
anyone.
12 & 12, p.76
Peace is possible for me only when I let go of expectations. When
I'm trapped in thoughts about what I want and what should be
coming to me, I'm in a state of fear or anxious anticipation and
this is not conducive to emotional sobriety. I must surrender--over
and over--to the reality of my dependence on God, for then I find
peace, gratitude and spiritual security.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We had become hopelessly sick people; spiritually, emotionally,
and physically. The power that controlled us was greater than
ourselves--it was John Barleycorn. Many drinkers have said: "I
hadn't gone that far; I hadn't lost my job on account of drink; I
still had my family; I managed to keep out of jail. True, I took too
much sometimes and I guess I managed to make quite an a$$ of
myself when I did, but I still thought I could control my drinking. I
didn't really believe that I was an alcoholic." If I was one of these,
have I fully changed my mind?
Meditation For The Day
Painful as the present time may be; you will one day see the reason
for it. You will see that it was not only testing, but also a
preparation for the life-work which you are to do. Have faith that
your prayers and aspirations will someday be answered.
Answered in a way that perhaps seems painful to you but is the only
right way. Selfishness and pride often make us want things that
are not good for us. They need to be burned out of our natures.
We must be rid of the blocks which are holding us back, before we
can expect our prayers to be answered.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be willing to go through a time of testing. I pray that
I may trust God for the outcome.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
To Survive Trials, p. 188
In our belief, any scheme of combating alcoholism which proposes wholly to shield the
sick man from temptation is doomed to failure. If the alcoholic tries to shield himself he
may succeed for a time, but he usually winds up with a bigger explosion than ever. We
have tried these methods. These attempts to do the impossible have always failed.
Release from alcohol, and not flight from it, is our answer.
<< << << >> >> >>
"Faith without works is dead." How appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic
fails to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he
cannot survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he does not work, he will surely
drink again, and if he drinks, he will surely die. Then faith will be dead indeed.
Alcoholics Anonymous
1. p. 101
2. pp. 14-15
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
What should I have said or done?
Second thoughts
After an intense discussion, we might rehash what we said and wish we'd said something else. Perhaps some brilliant remark occurs to us long after the conversation has ended.
We can say only what comes to us at the time of the discussion. Our best preparation for any such discussion.... however important.... is to place the matter in God's hands, seeking the highest good for everyone involved.
It may be that the brilliant thoughts coming to us later would have actually been inappropriate. After all, important discussions also involve exchanges of strong feelings that influence the meeting. If our feelings are in line with the high principles of the program, the discussion should go well. In such cases, we will probably say what we're supposed to say.
I'll do my best today without trying to second-guess every word or action.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Be brave enough to accept the help of others
Often is the past, we acted like we didn't need anyone. It takes courage to let others help us.
As we get better, our courage grows. We invite people into our lives. We help others, and we let others help us.
We will learn to let others help us if we work our program. Why? Because we need others to stay sober. When we have a problem, we talk about it in our group. When we need a shoulder to cry on, we call a friend or our sponsor. Over time, our relationships become one of the biggest rewards of recovery.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me see my need for others as a test---a test to see if I’ll be brave enough and wise enough to ask for help when I need it.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list four times in my life when I needed help but didn't ask for it. I'll tell a friend about how these times would have been different if I had asked for help.
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Each Day a New Beginning
. . . that is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way. --Doris Lessing
As we are changed by our experiences, that which we know also changes. Our experiences foster growth and enlightenment, and all awarenesses give way to new understandings. We are forever students of life blessed with particular lessons designed only for us. There is joy in knowing that learning has no end and that each day offers us a chance to move closer to becoming the persons we are meant to be.
To understand something more deeply requires that we be open to the ideas of others, willing to part with our present opinions. The program offers us many opportunities to trade in the understandings we've outgrown. Throughout our recovery we have discovered new interpretations of old ideas. And we will continue to expand our understanding.
Every situation, every person, every feeling, every idea has a slightly different hue each time we encounter it. The wonder of this is that life is forever enriched, forever fresh.
Each moment offers me a chance to know better who I am and to understand more fully the real contribution that is mine to make in this life. I will let the anticipation of my changing ideas excite me.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
WE AGNOSTICS
Instead, we looked at the human defects of these people, and sometimes used their shortcomings as a basis of wholesale condemnation. We talked of intolerance, while we were intolerant ourselves. We missed the reality and the beauty of the forest because we were diverted by the ugliness of some its trees. We never gave the spiritual side of life a fair hearing.
p. 50
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
ACCEPTANCE WAS THE ANSWER - The physician wasn't hooked, he thought--he just prescribed drugs medically indicated for his many ailments. Acceptance was his key to liberation.
Shakespeare said, "All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players." He forgot to mention that I was the chief critic. I was always able to see the flaw in every person, every situation. And I was always glad to point it out, because I knew you wanted perfection, just as I did. A.A. and acceptance have taught me that there is a bit of good in the worst of us and a bit of bad in the best of us; that we are all children of God and we each have a right to be here. When I complain about me or about you, I am complaining about God's handiwork. I am saying I know better than God.
p. 417
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Foreword
The basic principles of A.A., as they are known today, were borrowed mainly from the fields of religion and medicine, though some ideas upon which success finally depended were the result of noting the behavior and needs of the Fellowship itself.
p. 16
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The way in which we think of ourselves has everything to do with how
our world sees us.
--Arlene Raven
Don't believe everything you think.
--unknown
"Put love first. Entertain thoughts that give life. And when a thought
or resentment, or hurt, or fear comes your way, have another thought
that is more powerful -- a thought that is love."
--Mary Manin Morrissey
"Keep your face to the sunshine of His love and the shadows will fall
behind you."
--unknown
Take a walk with God. He will meet you at the Steps.
--unknown
It's easier to tear a hole than to mend one.
--Russian Proverb
Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.
--unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
RELIGION
"Doubt isn't the opposite of
faith; it is an element of faith."
--Paul Tillich
That part of me that does not know is vibrant in spirituality.
Problems are part of what it is to be human and an element of
doubt is essential. With the doubt comes the growth. However, as
a younger man I was told that it was a sin to doubt; God demanded a
steadfast faith and doubt could have no part of faith! I remember
going to confession and feeling guilty and ashamed about my doubts --
but I did doubt and doubt has always played a part in my life. In some
ways I think that my religious doubts have been the most creative part
of me -- certainly they have enabled me to grow and build a bridge of
understanding with others.
Master, hear, through the doubts, my love of You.
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Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him; Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass. Cease from anger, and forsake wrath; Do not fret it only causes harm.
Psalm 37:7-8
He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under
the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge
and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust.
Psalm 81:1-2
Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He shall lift you up.
James 4:10
Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye steadfast, unmoveable, always
abounding in the work of the Lord, for as much as ye know that your
labor is not in vain in the Lord.
1 Corinthians 15:58
Blessed is the man who listens to me, watching daily at my doors.
Proverbs 8:34
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Daily Inspiration
Talking about how busy you are only adds stress to the stress you already feel. Lord, help me complete the tasks of my day and avoid taking on more than I can handle.
Rejoice and be happy for others when they are blessed. Lord, bless me with the ability to be free of envy so that I can truly share the joy of my neighbors.
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NA Just For Today
God In Each Other
"One aspect of our spiritual awakening comes through the new understanding of our Higher Power that we develop by sharing another addict's recovery."
Basic Text, p.51
We've heard it said that we often see God most clearly in one another. We see the truth of this when we practice our Twelfth Step. When we carry the recovery message to another addict, we sense the presence of a Power greater than ourselves. And as we watch the message take hold, we realize something else.
It's the message that brings recovery, not the messenger. A Higher Power, not our own power, is the source of the change that begins when we carry the message to a still-suffering addict. As the message does its work, transforming the life of another addict, we see a Higher Power in action. We watch as acceptance and hope replace denial and despair. Before our very eyes, the first traces of honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness begin to appear. Something's happening inside this person, something bigger and more powerful than either of us. We're watching the God we've come to understand at work in someone's life. We see the Higher Power in them. And we know with greater certainty than ever that this Higher Power is in us, too, as the force driving our recovery.
Just for today: As I carry the message of recovery to other addicts, I will try to pay attention to the Power behind the message. Today, as I watch other addicts recover, I will try to recognize the God in them so I can better recognize the God in myself.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I found words to every thought I ever had, but one. . . . --Emily Dickinson
What kinds of thoughts can't be put into words? We feel lost in space, mind-boggled by how small and big the stars are. We are sure and unsure about death, its blank and steady stare. Or we have done something that makes us feel both good and bad. Sometimes we hate someone we love, but we aren't sure what hate is, or love. We are scared of crowds and afraid of being abandoned, always alone. Sometimes we just want to laugh and cry, and when words fail we expect someone to know what our silences mean.
What are some ways I try to express my feelings without using words?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Those who are mentally and emotionally healthy are those who have learned when to say yes, when to say no, and when to say whoopee! --Willard S. Krabill
We men have fallen into many difficulties because of poorly defined personal boundaries. Some of us never learned to say no to our mothers and felt invaded or ruled by them. Or we never truly said no to our fathers - never went through a teenage rebellion to establish ourselves as adults. Others have gotten stuck saying no and have never learned to yield and say yes.
Boundary problems have been part of the difficulty in many areas of our lives. We've told ourselves we have no right to our yes or no, or we've said we're strong enough to sacrifice for someone else, or we've welcomed the escape from ourselves in discarding our choice. Not saying no when we needed to or not saying yes when we wanted to has led many of us into doctors' offices, courts, jails, lost jobs, divorces, and bad marriages. Now the inner voice of our Higher Power is showing us our limits and encouraging us to stand up for them.
I am learning to know myself by defining my boundaries and choosing when and when not to cross them.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
. . . that is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way. --Doris Lessing
As we are changed by our experiences, that which we know also changes. Our experiences foster growth and enlightenment, and all awarenesses give way to new understandings. We are forever students of life blessed with particular lessons designed only for us. There is joy in knowing that learning has no end and that each day offers us a chance to move closer to becoming the persons we are meant to be.
To understand something more deeply requires that we be open to the ideas of others, willing to part with our present opinions. The program offers us many opportunities to trade in the understandings we've outgrown. Throughout our recovery we have discovered new interpretations of old ideas. And we will continue to expand our understanding.
Every situation, every person, every feeling, every idea has a slightly different hue each time we encounter it. The wonder of this is that life is forever enriched, forever fresh.
Each moment offers me a chance to know better who I am and to understand more fully the real contribution that is mine to make in this life. I will let the anticipation of my changing ideas excite me.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Getting It All Out
Let yourself have a good gripe session. From: " Woman, Sex, and Addiction" -- Charlotte Davis Kasl, Ph.D.
Get it out. Go ahead. Get it all out. Once we begin recovery, we may feel like it's not okay to gripe and complain. We may tell ourselves that if we were really working a good program, we wouldn't need to complain.
What does that mean? We won't have feelings? We won't feel overwhelmed? We won't need to blow off steam or work through some not so pleasant, not so perfect, and not so pretty parts of life?
We can let ourselves get our feelings out, take risks, and be vulnerable with others. We don't have to be all put together, all the time. That sounds more like codependency than recovery.
Getting it all out doesn't mean we need to be victims. It doesn't mean we need to revel in our misery, finding status in our martyrdom. It doesn't mean we won't go on to set boundaries. It doesn't mean we won't take care of ourselves.
Sometimes, getting it all out is an essential part of taking care of ourselves. We reach a point of surrender so we can move forward.
Self-disclosure does not mean only quietly reporting our feelings. It means we occasionally take the risk to share our human side-the side with fears, sadness, hurt, rage, unreasonable anger, weariness, or lack of faith.
We can let our humanity show. In the process, we give others permission to be human too. "Together" people have their not so together moments. Sometimes, falling apart - getting it all out - is how we get put back together.
Today, I will let it all out if I need a release.
Today I let go totally and give God the space to do His work. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Recognize the Signs
Sometimes, the universe gives us warnings.
I was driving down a local highway in New Mexico, a safe distance behind the car in front of me. Suddenly, the driver slammed on his brakes to avoid a huge puddle, a flood of water in front of him. I stopped short, but the car behind me was following too closely and rammed into the rear of my Jeep.
I got out and inspected the damage. My car was fine. The woman who rammed me had dented her bumper. No one was harmed. I got back in my Jeep, thinking it was over. But as I drove off, I began to wonder. Something about the incident still nagged at me.
Several weeks later, I was driving down a fast-moving two-lane highway. Behind me was a large truck loaded with cars. In front of me were several cars. In front of the cars was a school bus. The traffic was moving at at least fifty-five miles an hour.
Suddenly, I saw the brake lights from the cars ahead. The school bus had stopped to let a child disembark. I pulled to a stop behind the car in front of me. Then I remembered the lesson from the accident a couple of weeks ago: sometimes I can stop safely, but the driver behind me can’t.
I looked out my rearview mirror. The truck loaded with cars was frantically trying to stop. I pulled my car off the road onto the shoulder, giving him an extra car length. He screeched to a stop, right behind the car ahead of me. Had I not noticed, not pulled out, we’d all have been piled up. And the children in the bus…
Sometimes accidents happen without warning, but sometimes the universe gives us a nudge, a little sign. We don’t have to become paranoid, we don’t have to think every event means something, but we can trust ourselves to recognize a sign when we see one.
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More Language Of Letting Go
It will get better
Sometimes things need to feel worse before they get better. Feelings are one of those things.
When a feeling comes to the surface, it presents itself boldly. Usually the feelings being stirred up are ones we label unpleasant– fear, hurt, rage, guilt, shame or deep sorrow and grief. They will feel intense, for a while. Some feelings take a moment to come to the surface and clear. Other feelings take more time.
Feeling the emotion that intensely means it’s finally clearing out of your system. Even though it may feel like it, it’s not really getting worse. It’s healing, it’s getting better. You’re cleaning out that old wound. To do that, you have to reopen it, but just for a little while. But finally, after you do that, it will truly heal.
What do you need to do with feelings? Acknowledge them. Feel them. Give each one its due. They like to be honored that way. Once you identify and feel them, then they’ll go away. And each time you do this, the pond becomes clearer and cleaner, until finally the water is pure.
Notice how you react to yourself when a feeling comes up that needs attention and care. Do you spend as much time resisting the feeling as you actually do feeling the emotion? Do you expend more energy than necessary worrying that the feeling won’t leave, that you won’t be able to handle it, or that the feeling will take over your life? Consciously and deliberately relinquish your resistance to your emotional world. In March we learned to say whatever as part of speaking the language of letting go. Now practice saying whatever in love to your feelings.
God, give me the courage to face what I feel now, and what I felt before and didn’t have the resources to feel. Help me trust that this process will help me feel better than I did before.
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Food for Thought
Life Is Opportunity
Each morning when we wake up, we thank our Higher Power for another day of abstaining. Each hour that is given to us is a chance to grow and learn and serve. We can believe that God has a plan for every day that he gives us and that He will reveal the plan step by step as we listen for His guidance.
If we are too intent on carrying out our personal ideas and projects, we may miss the directions that come from God. We need to remain open and flexible so that He may use us as He chooses.
Considering the time and tasks that we have as opportunities to serve saves us from self-centered worry and anxiety. We do not have to be compulsive about our work and activities. God knows our capabilities and will not give us more than we can handle. He is always ready to direct our efforts when we turn to Him.
Thank You for the opportunity to live and serve today.
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A Self-Created State
Worry
Worry is an extension of fear and can also set you up for attracting that which you don’t want in your life.
We have all had the experience of worrying about something at some point in our lives. Some of us have a habitual tendency to worry, and all of us have known someone who is a chronic worrier. Worry is an extension of fear and can be a very draining experience. In order for worry to exist, we have to imagine that something bad might happen. What we are worrying about has not happened yet, however, so this bad thing is by definition a fantasy. Understood this way, worry is a self-created state of needless fear. Still, most of us worry.
One reason we worry is because we feel like we’re not in control. For example, you might worry about your loved ones driving home in bad weather. There is nothing you can do to guarantee their safe passage, but you worry until you find out they have reached their destination unharmed. In this instance, worry is an attempt to feel useful and in control. However, worrying does nothing to ensure a positive outcome and it has an unpleasant effect on your body, mind, and spirit. The good news is that there are ways to transform this kind of worry so that it has a healing effect. Just as worry uses the imagination, so does the antidote to worry. Next time you find that you are worrying, imagine the best result instead of anticipating the worst outcome. Visualize your loved ones’ path bathed in white light and clearly see in your mind’s eye their safe arrival. Imagine angels or guides watching over them as they make their way home. Generate peace and well-being instead of nervousness and unease within yourself.
Another reason we worry is that something that we know is pending but are avoiding is nagging us—an unpaid parking ticket, an upcoming test, an issue with a friend. In these cases, acknowledging that we are worried and taking action is the best solution. If you can confront the situation and own your power to change it, you’ll have no reason to worry. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
What wonderful things could happen in my life if I could get rid of my natural impulse to justify my actions. Is honesty so deeply repr4essed under layers of guilt that I can’t release it to understand my motives? Being honest with ourselves isn’t easy. It’s difficult to search out why I had this or that impulse and, more importantly, why I acted upon it. Nothing makes us feel so vulnerable as to give up the crutch of The Alibi, yet my willingness to be vulnerable will go a long way toward helping me grow in The Program. Am I becoming more aware that self-deception multiplies my problems?
Today I Pray
May God remove my urge to make excuses. Help me to face up to the realities that surface when I am honest with myself. Help me to know, as certainly as day follows sunrise, that my difficulties will be lessened if I can only trust His Will.
Today I Will Remember
I will be willing to do His Will.
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One More Day
Smiles form the channels of a future tear.
– Lord Byron
We have often watched smiles turn to laughter and laughter back to tears. At a family reunion, we hear the joyous sounds of people chattering away, trying to catch up in five minutes for twenty lost years.
People who have Parkinson’s disease sometimes complain that their faces don’t match the emotions they want to express. The mask of the illness slows down normal movement of facial muscles. Even more tragic is the person who doesn’t feel emotion. No laughter and no tears.
We are fortunate to be able to express our emotions, to show contentment and unhappiness. So what if today’s laughter becomes tomorrow’s tears? We know we’ll laugh again — and cry again. Our past experiences give meaning to the present.
I will accept all my emotions as an affirmation of my life. Changing emotions are a part of normal living.
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One Day At A Time
FEAR
“Few persons live up to the faith which they really have.
Unreasoned fear is a master intellectual fraud
practiced upon the evolving mortal soul.”
The Urantia Book
“Unreasoned fear” was my main problem for most of my life. I lived with a myriad of fears which seemed to be too awesome and terrible to face. I love the fact that since finding this recovery program, I no longer have to live in fear. What wondrous freedom I found in the realization that unreasoned fear is “intellectual fraud!”
One slogan I recall about fear says: “Future Events Appear Real.” That is the first one that really helped me to realize that most of my fears were not based on what was real. By working the Steps of this program I have managed to stop attempting to live in a future filled with fear. When I focus on just being here now -- living in this moment only -- I don't have to run from fear.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will stay in this moment. I will look at the people and things that are here right now and enjoy what my Higher Power has given me.
~ Steph
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
When you have carefully explained to such people that he is a sick person, you will have created a new atmosphere. Barriers which have sprung up between you and your friends will disappear with the growth of sympathetic understanding. You will no longer be self-conscious or feel that you must apologize as though your husband were a weak character. He may be anything but that. Your new courage, good nature and lack of self-consciousness will do wonders for you socially. - Pg. 115 - To Wives
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
It is necessary in the beginning to be clean from dry drugs and dry from wet drugs, but it is not all we want to obtain. We want wholeness and we want growth. This comes from living each hour according to the principles we are learning.
My Spiritual Source demonstrates that clean and dry is not my only goal--but growth is.
Dreaming Dreams
Today, I will dream dreams. There is nothing wrong with having a couple of dreams for myself if they are realistic and don't remove me from life too much. To work toward a dream can be a constructive use of my talents and energies. It can give me a positive focus. If my dreams are wild and I am not willing to do the work necessary to realize them, they will only frustrate me and lower my self-esteem. If, however, I am able to dream what makes sense for me and work to put it within my reach, it can be a real process of growth and challenge. My energy and enthusiasm can help me move through blocks, and my commitment can show me that love and effort can be their own reward.
I can stretch myself.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Deal with the small stuff or it will deal with you. Do not allow the small stuff to pile up on the camel's back. Take each situation that bothers you and deal with that as one unit, not as the straw that breaks the camel's back.
When I feel it, I deal with it and then can heal from it.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Do your Third Step every morning and turn your will over to the care of the God of your understanding. At night, take a Tenth Step to see how God's doing.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I let go totally and give God the space to do His work.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
A man was walking on a beach after a storm. Thousands of starfish were stranded on the shore. He saw a boy throwing starfish back into the ocean and asked the boy why. The boy replied: 'The tide's going out, the starfish will die in the sun. The man said; 'But there's so many of them, what difference can it make? The boy threw another starfish and said : It'll make a difference to that one.' Anon.
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