Dave42001

Have a great sober day!!

December 14

Daily Reflections

REACHING OUT

Never talk down to an alcoholic from any moral or spiritual
hilltop; simply lay out the kit of spiritual tools for his
inspection. Show him how they worked with you.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 95

When I come into contact with a newcomer, do I have a
tendency to look at him from my perceived angle of success
in A.A.? Do I compare him with the large number of
acquaintances I have made in the Fellowship? Do I point out
to him in a magisterial way the voice of A.A.? What is my
real attitude toward him? I must examine myself whenever I
meet a newcomer to make sure that I am carrying the message
with simplicity, humility and generosity. The one who still
suffers from the terrible disease of alcoholism must find
in me a friend who will allow him to get to know the A.A.
way, because I had such a friend when I arrived in A.A. Today
it is my turn to hold out my hand, with love, to my sister or
brother alcoholic, and to show her or him the way to
happiness.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

The way of A.A. is the way of service. Without that, it would
not work. We have been "on the wagon" and hated it. We have
taken the pledge and waited for the time to be up with
impatience. We have tried in all manner of ways to help
ourselves. But not until we begin to help other people do we
get full relief. It is an axiom that the A.A. program has
to be given away in order to be kept. A river flows into the
Dead Sea and stops. A river flows into a clear pool and flows
out again. We get and then we give. If we do not give, we do
not keep. Have I given up all ideas of holding A.A. for myself
alone?

Meditation For The Day

Try to see the life of the spirit as a calm place, shut away
from the turmoil of the world. Think of your spiritual home
as a place full of peace, serenity, and contentment. Go to
this quiet, meditative place for the strength to carry you
through today's duties and problems. Keep coming back here
for refreshment when you are weary of the hubbub of the
outside world. From this quietness and communion comes our
strength.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may keep this resting place where I can commune
with God. I pray that I may find refreshment in meditation on
the Eternal.

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As Bill Sees It

After the "Honeymoon", p. 216

"For most of us, the first years of A.A. are something like a
honeymoon. There is a new and potent reason to stay alive, joyful
activity aplenty. For a time, we are diverted from the main life
problems. That is all to the good.

"But when the honeymoon has worn off, we are obliged to take
our lumps, like other people. This is where the testing starts.
Maybe the group has pushed us onto the side lines. Maybe
difficulties have intensified at home, or in the world outside. Then
the old behavior patterns reappear. How well we recognize and
deal with them reveals the extent of our progress."

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The wise have always known that no one can make much of his
life until self-searching becomes a regular habit, until he is able to
admit and accept what he finds, and until he patiently and
persistently tries to correct what is wrong.

1. Letter, 1954
2. 12 & 12, p. 88

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Walk In Dry Places

The best of the Past
Living today.
We're told that we should forget the past when we come into AA. Since we can't change it, we should not waste time and energy reliving it.
Let's be careful, however, not to take this advice too literally. There was much in our past that was good, even when we were drinking. We have a right and a need to treasure these important things.
The real dangers of living in the past come either from brooding about its mistakes or from thinking that our best days are already behind us. We can think of the past as a foundation for the good we expect today and in all the days ahead.
I'll preserve the best in my memories of the past, knowing that these helped bring me to my present state of recovery.

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Keep It Simple

Hold fast to dreams for if dreams die, life is broken winged bird that cannot fly.
--Langston Hughes
Many of our dreams died as our addiction got worse. We felt the loss but couldn't speak it. With recovery, we regain our ability to dream. Dreams of sharing our lives with family and friends return. They push out thoughts of getting high. Dreams of pride and self-respect reappear. They replace the awful feeling of shame. Like the quote above says, "Hold fast to dreams...." Our dreams are our wishes for the future.
They hold a picture of who we want to be. In our dreams, we let our spirits soar. Often, we fell close to God, others and ourselves. Thanks God, we can dream again.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thanks to you, my wings have been mended. Guide me as I fly.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll take time out to dream and share my dream with those I love.

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Each Day a New Beginning

A theme may seem to have been put aside, but it keeps returning--the same thing modulated, somewhat changed in form. --Muriel Rukeyser
No struggle we have is really new. It's another shade of the struggle that plagued us last week or perhaps last year. And we'll stumble again and again until we learn to quit struggling. The trying situations at work, or the personality type that irritates us, will always exist. But when we've come to accept as good and growth-enhancing all situations and all persons, we'll sense the subtle absence of struggle. We'll realize that the person we couldn't tolerate has become a friend. The situation we couldn't handle is resolved, forever.
The lessons we need to learn keep presenting themselves, until we've finished the homework. If we sense a struggle today, we can look at it as an assignment, one that is meant for our growth. We can remember that our struggles represent our opportunities to grow. Fortunately, the program has given us a tutor. We have a willing teacher to help us. We need to move on, to be open to other assignments. No problem will be too much for us to handle.
I will enjoy my role as student today. I will be grateful for all opportunities to grow. They make possible my very special contribution in this life.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM

We do not like to pronounce any individual as alcoholic, but you can quickly diagnose yourself, Step over to the nearest barroom and try some controlled drinking. Try to drink and stop abruptly. Try it more than once. It will not take long for you to decide, if you are honest with yourself about it. It may be worth a bad case of jitters if you get a full knowledge of your condition.

pp. 31-32

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

Our Southern Friend

Pioneer A.A., minister's son, and southern farmer, he asked, "Who am I to say there is no God?"

I become a teacher in a boy's school. I am happy in my work. I like the boys and we have lots of fun, in class and out.

p. 211

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Eleven - "Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out."

In the morning we think of the hours to come. Perhaps we think of our day's work and the chances it may afford us to be useful and helpful, or of some special problem that it may bring. Possibly today will see a continuation of a serious and as yet unresolved problem left over from yesterday. Our immediate temptation will be to ask for specific solutions to specific problems, and for the ability to help other people as we have already thought they should be helped. In that case, we are asking God to do it our way. Therefore, we ought to consider each request carefully to see what its real merit is. Even so, when making specific requests, it will be well to add to each one of them this qualification: "...if it be Thy will." We ask simply that throughout the day God place in us the best understanding of His will that we can have for that day, and that we be given the grace by which we may carry it out.

p. 102

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In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog
that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.
--Dereke Bruce

"Life is short, and we have never too much time for gladdening the hearts of those who
are traveling the dark journey with us. Oh, be swift to love, make haste to be kind."
--Henri Frederic Amiel

"The human spirit rings with hope at the sound of an encouraging word.
--unknown

"Many a good man has failed because he had his wishbone where his backbone should
have been."
--Unknown

The first step identifies the problem, the remaining eleven steps are the solution.
The first tradition identifies the problem, the remaining eleven traditions are how we do that.
--unknown

"Every situation can be a positive situation if you look upon it as an opportunity for
growth and self-improvement."
--Brian Tracy

"Step into a new you each day. Reach out to greater health, happiness, fitness,
friendship, love and greater pride in yourself."
--Mark Victor Hansen

Every recovery from alcoholism began with one sober hour.

Life didn't end when I got sober -- it started.

H E A L = Helping Every Alcoholic Live.

Take a walk with God. He will meet you at the Steps.

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

GOD

"My God, my God, why hast
thou forsaken me."
-- Jesus (Matthew 27:46)

In my sickness I was often angry at God. Angry that He did not do what I wanted
Him to do when I wanted Him to do it. I was a spoiled child. I refused to understand
that suffering could be an important part of my spiritual growth. Today I know this to
be true.

The biggest part of my suffering, then and today, is the feeling of isolation. Not
knowing for certain that He hears me. Not understanding completely what His will is
for me. Not getting clear answers to my daily confusion.

The doubt is part of the faith. The "not knowing" is the answer.

Lord, may the daily doubts lead to a creative faith.

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"All things work together for good to them that love God."
Romans 8:28

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be
dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."
Joshua 1:9

"Seek the LORD and live."
Amos 5:6a

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Daily Inspiration

Laughter is a speedy way to bring people together, build friendships and reduce stresses. Lord, help me participate in the many opportunities to feel the calming effect of laughter.

It is good to know where you are, but better to know where you are going. Lord, may I use every day to grow closer to You.

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NA Just For Today

Addiction, Drugs, And Recovery

"Addiction is a physical, mental, and spiritual disease that affects every area of our lives."
Basic Text pg. 20

Before we started using, most of us had a stereotype, a mental image of what addicts were supposed to look like. Some of us pictured a junkie robbing convenience markets for drug money. Others imagined a paranoid recluse peering at life from behind perpetually drawn drapes and locked doors. As long as we didn't fit any of the stereotypes, we thought, we couldn't be addicts.

As our using progressed, we discarded those misconceptions about addiction, only to come up with another: the idea that addiction was about drugs. We may have thought addiction meant a physical habit, believing any drug that didn't produce physical habituation was not "addictive." Or we thought the drugs we took were causing all our problems. We thought that merely getting rid of the drugs would restore sanity to our lives.

One of the most important lessons we learn in Narcotics Anonymous is that addiction is much more than the drugs we used. Addiction is a part of us; it's an illness that involves every area of our lives, with or without drugs. We can see its effects on our thoughts, our feelings, and our behavior, even after we stop using. Because of this, we need a solution that works to repair every area of our lives: the Twelve Steps.

Just for today: Addiction is not a simple disease, but it has a simple solution. Today, I will live in that solution: the Twelve Steps of recovery.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Each day comes bearing its gifts. Untie the ribbons. --Ann Ruth Schabacker
Today will be filled with surprises, big ones and small ones, like the gifts at a birthday party. Maybe we'll see a friend we haven't seen for a while. Or we'll find something we thought was lost. Whatever happens today will be special, and is meant to help us grow in just the right way.
Growing up doesn't always feel easy. We're expected to be more responsible and thoughtful of others. We're expected to be honest about our feelings and needs. If we're angry or scared, we need to tell someone. Sharing our secret about being afraid relieves us of the fear, and we feel lighter, happier, like after opening a special gift.
When I receive today's gifts, will I stop to appreciate them?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
No matter how old you get, if you can keep the desire to be creative, you're keeping the man-child alive. --John Cassavetes
Creation is the work of God. It is not given to most of us to be famous artists. But the spiritual experience of being creative is open to us when we take on a creative attitude toward what we are doing. We might do this on the job when we determine to do more than just get the job done. We may decide to have fun while we do what needs to be done, or we may decide to put our best spirit into the work before us. Some men find creativity in working with wood, others in coaching sports with children, someone else in cooking, and another in community service.
Being creative moves us toward wholeness as people. As we create on the outside, we are being created on the inside. The way in which we live every aspect of our lives is a creative, growing process and a partnership with God.
As I approach this day, I will have an attitude of creativity that will nurture the wondering child within me.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
A theme may seem to have been put aside, but it keeps returning--the same thing modulated, somewhat changed in form. --Muriel Rukeyser
No struggle we have is really new. It's another shade of the struggle that plagued us last week or perhaps last year. And we'll stumble again and again until we learn to quit struggling. The trying situations at work, or the personality type that irritates us, will always exist. But when we've come to accept as good and growth-enhancing all situations and all persons, we'll sense the subtle absence of struggle. We'll realize that the person we couldn't tolerate has become a friend. The situation we couldn't handle is resolved, forever.
The lessons we need to learn keep presenting themselves, until we've finished the homework. If we sense a struggle today, we can look at it as an assignment, one that is meant for our growth. We can remember that our struggles represent our opportunities to grow. Fortunately, the program has given us a tutor. We have a willing teacher to help us. We need to move on, to be open to other assignments. No problem will be too much for us to handle.
I will enjoy my role as student today. I will be grateful for all opportunities to grow. They make possible my very special contribution in this life.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Clear Thinking
Strive for clear thinking. Many of us have had our thinking clouded by denial. Some of us have even lost faith in ourselves because we've spent a degree of time in denial. But losing faith in our thinking isn't going to help us. What we need to lose faith in is denial.
We didn't resort to denial - either of someone else's problem or our own - because we were deficient. Denial, the shock absorber for the soul, protects us until we are equipped to cope with reality.
Clear thinking and recovery don't mean we will never resort to denial. Denial is the first step toward acceptance, and for most of our life, we will be striving to accept something.
Clear thinking means we don't allow ourselves to become immersed in negativity or unrealistic expectations. We stay connected to other recovering people. We go to our meetings, where peace of mind and realistic support are available. We work the Steps, pray, and meditate.
We keep our thinking on track by asking our Higher Power to help us think clearly - not by expecting Him, or someone else, to do our thinking for us.
Today, I will strive for balanced, clear thought in all areas of my life.


Today I can look back with love in my heart, knowing that every moment, every experience of my life has been necessary, valuable and significant. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey To The Heart

Open Your Heart to Universal Love

We live in a magical, living, vital, and personal universe, a world where universal love is real.

We don’t just live in it, we’re part of it, visibly and tangibly connected to it. The phone call that comes at the right time. A book that teaches us what we need to know. A movie that has the message we need to guide us and open our hearts. An opportunity that arises, at just the right moment. An idea triggered by something someone says or an object we didn’t notice before.

The more we open to universal love, the more it will be there for us, embracing, loving, holding, guiding us. The more we learn to see it, the more it will be there– until we wonder why we never saw it before.

Open your heart to universal love. It’s more than merely there. It’s there for you. Jump into the arms of a living, magical world and you leap into the arms of universal love. See how real it can be.

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More Language Of Letting Go

You’re not a survivor anymore

Many years ago, I asked a fellow therapist what the one thing was that hallmarked the unhappy state of being many of us have come to label as codependency.

“It’s the Karpman Drama Triangle,” he said. “People rescue someone by doing something they don’t want to do, or it’s not their business to do. Then they get angry and persecute the person. Then they walk away, feeling like a victim. Again.”

A light when on in that moment. Like a gerbil on a wheel, I could see myself spinning around this triangle. I was regularly rescuing somebody, then getting angry, and ultimately feeling victimized by it all.

I was creating the pain and the drama in my life.

Over the years, I stopped rescuing alcoholics. Many of us have gotten off that painful wheel. We know we can’t control another person’s chemical dependency, depression, problems, or life. But we may have stepped off that wheel and gotten ourselves into another more subtle drama spin.

A friend recently cleaned our his entire house– closets, garage, drawers. He had to hire a truck to come and take everything away.

“I can’t believe everything I collected and hung onto,” he said. “Most of it was junk that I didn’t want in the first place. I guess that came from being poor and going without for so long. I convinced myself that if it was free or cheap, I’d better grab it and take it home.”

Many of us were survivors at one time. We either genuinely didn’t have a choice or convinced ourselves we didn’t. So we clung to whoever and whatever came along our path.

You may have survived what you went through, but you’re not a survivor anymore. There is no need to desperately cling to whatever comes along. You’re living now. You’re living fully and freely.

Choose what you want.

God, help me give myself permission to walk a path with heart.

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People in Need
Taking Our Turn to Give by Madisyn Taylor

The greatest gift we can give to somebody in need is giving awareness and without judgment.

When we see a person in need, we may want to give them something as a way of helping them, but if we give without taking the time to see who they really are, honoring that most of all, our gift is nowhere near as powerful as it could be. We may want to give a homeless person a sandwich, for example, but if we give it without also taking a moment to look the person in the eye, making authentic contact, we rob them of the experience of being human.

Being in a position of need leaves a lot of people feeling vulnerable and full of self-doubt. The greatest gift we can give is to meet people in need without judgment and with the awareness that we are not superior to them simply because we are not currently in their position. If we take the long view, we can see that we all began life in need of a lot of care and attention, and many of us end life in the same way. Giving and receiving are companion energies that take turns throughout our lives, and we all get a chance to be on both sides of the exchange from time to time.

It’s important to be aware of our own tendency to give from a desire to feel good about ourselves, rather than from an acknowledgement of our connection to all people. Letting go of our self-importance allows us to see that, regardless of appearances, we are all givers and receivers. When we are in the position of the giver, we honor those we are helping when we remember the many people who have helped us. Then we can look the person we are helping in the eye, aware that we are making contact with a human being who is our equal. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Some of us in The Program are inclined to make the mistake of thinking that the few moments we spend in prayer and meditation — in “talking to God” — are all that count. The truth is that the attitude we maintain throughou7t the entire day is just as important. If we place ourselves in God’s hands in the morning, and throughout the day hold ourselves ready to accept His will as it is made known through the events of our daily life, our attitude of acceptance becomes a constant prayer. Can I try to cultivate an attitude of total acceptance each day?

Today I Pray

May I maintain contact with my Higher Power all through my day, not just check in for a prayer now and then. May my communion with God never become merely a casual aside. May I come to know that every time I do something that is in accord with God’s will I am living a prayer.

Today I Will Remember

Prayer is an attitude.

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One More Day

I am just a heartbeat away from loneliness.
– Laura Palmer

The holiday season can be difficult for anyone who has had a major life change. A person who has been widowed, has moved, or has had to deal with new physical limitations may become lonesome when each holiday, birthday, or anniversary rolls around.

We sometimes cause ourselves pain by isolating ourselves. We may feel that no one wants to share the holiday with us or that we don’t wish to impose the inconvenience of illness upodn friends.

By reminding ourselves of the meaning of these special days, we often find that we can move out of our isolation. Holidays and other occasions reaffirm the value of tradition, love, and family. These days compel us to remember our place within a welcoming circle of friends and family.

I can choose to reach out during the holidays — or any day.

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One Day At A Time

~CHANGE~
To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits
in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable.
Helen Keller

As far back as I can remember, I have always been fearful of change. I preferred to stay in my comfort zone, even when it became uncomfortable or painful. I suppose that was why I stayed in the disease for so long; it was what I knew. It was safe and predictable and I didn't have to deal with painful emotions such as loss and rejection. This was also why I stayed so long in a bad marriage; I was terrified of what was outside the walls of my dysfunctional relationship. In truth, I didn't really live, because fear of change prevented me from forming new relationships and doing new and exciting things. Even the move from one city to another was totally traumatic, because the old and familiar was what I knew, not because it was better. Even then, I spent so long looking at the closed door behind me that I failed to see the open door in front of me.

I know now that even when I fear change, I need only put one foot in front of the other, and do what is before me. Because I now have faith that my Higher Power will be with me every step of the way, I need only ask for help, and the help comes. Even though it still is not easy, I am aware of how many changes I have been able to make with the help of my Higher Power. In the past, I spent so much time obsessing about the outcome that I talked myself out of the change I was thinking of making. The biggest change that has happened for me is my newfound faith which enables me to take that leap into the unknown.

There have been other miraculous changes too. Now I have a more open and honest relationship with my children and others because I am able to take more risks and set boundaries, which I had never been able to do before. I have changed careers, undertaken flying overseas on my own, and in general am not the scared person I used to be. I also have a whole new family of wonderful friends in this fellowship who understand me and love me always.

One Day at a Time . . .
I continue to grow and change as God wills me to do, and I will not be afraid because I know that He will always be there to guide and help me.
Sharon S.

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

My friend had emphasized the absolute necessity of demonstrating these principles in all my affairs. Particularly was it imperative to work with others as he had worked with me. Faith without works was dead, he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he did not work, he would surely drink again, and if he drank, he would surely die. Then faith would be dead indeed. With us it is just like that. - Pgs. 14-15 - Bill's Story

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

We can never get enough of what we really do not want. We don't really want drugs, we want what we hope they'll bring us, wholeness, satisfaction, escape from pain.

God, as I understand You, let me see what I really want.

Spirit Calls

Spirit calls to me within and without. In a still, small voice I sense spirit whispering in my inner ear. My body feels an increasing sense of aliveness as I invite spirit to make itself known to me. I do not even need to make room for spirit, because spirit breathes in each pore within me. It fills the numbness with energy. It fills the emptiness and causes my cup to overflow with its presence. There are gifts in listening if I am willing to sense, hear and see them, lessons I can learn. Little hints that help me to appreciate what I already have and open myself to experiencing more.

I will look for evidence of spirit at work in my life

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

There is no completion for the circle of recovery. A circle has no beginning and no end. It is suggested that recovery begins when you have learned enough from those before you and pass it along to those behind. Love is the process that keeps the circle moving.

Standing hand in hand or arm in arm after a meeting I absorb the love that travels our circle of recovery.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

To the desolate alcoholic, the act of kindness can be the difference between getting 'better' or getting 'bitter.'

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I can look back with love in my heart, knowing that every moment, every experience of my life has been necessary, valuable and significant.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Using will power to control drinking is about as effective as using will power on diarrhea. - Steve M.
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