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squirrelly77 09-30-2004 02:12 PM

Just now learning this...
 
I'm "fairly" new to the whole AA concept and I wanted to share some of what I just learned--well, this is really meant for those who are considering it and don't really know yet what to do.
I'm a college student, and it was always a running joke between us about AA and all those drunks that were there. We would jab each other after a long night of drinking that we're going to start going to AA as soon as we remove our heads from the toilet. I know now that we were joking about something that we could see in ourselves...and it scared us. At least, that was the case for me. So, after I realized that, well...maybe I should start going because it was really getting out of hand, I was ignorant to the fact that all AA meetings are not the same. The first few meetings I went to had a lot of self-pity, anger, and resentment running through the group. I just want to atest that AA is NOT AA is NOT AA.
These first few meetings really painted that picture of AA that my friends and I would joke about. It was kind of disheartening, and I would relapse many many times while attending these meetings. No one ever told me that it was "okay" to look around...go to different meetings...find your match.
Although the circumstances bringing me home were not the most favorable (dropping out of school because I had nothing to my name), I can NOW say that it has been an absolute God-send!!! Lately, I've been going to meetings that have awesome people, with a ton of sobriety, and especially wonderful leaders. The one I went to last night...the leader had 20 years sobriety!!! I just looked at him in awe. Anyways...the things that are being brought up--I can relate to. I keep hearing that AA is a way of living...sorta like a blueprint for how to live the most enjoyable and happy life. Like the leader said last night...for some reason, he wasn't given the (I NOW understand this word!) tools to live life and now he does. He said nearly everyone, no matter who they are, could benefit from them. I totally knew where he was comming from. So, yeah...AA is a support group, but it also provides you with the know-how to be the very best person you can be.

All I can say after the hell and embarrasement of being a perpetual student, then failing to graduate with only 6 credits left is...
:angel2: **Blessings in disguise abound** :angel2:

That degree is MINE. Eventually.
:) Danielle

Brookie 09-30-2004 03:17 PM

Hey Danielle - Congrats on finding a meeting you really like! Houston has over 2000 meetings a week, and I've tried a bunch of them. Some I loved, some were so-so, and some are almost enough to drive me back into the bottle. I'm glad I've looked around as well.

Best,
Joe

mikel60 09-30-2004 03:38 PM

Hey Squirrelly,
Awesome post. It wasn't until I looked around, or maybe cleared up a little, that I found some meetings I really thought could help. Since then, I've been on,as the early Dropkick Murphys would call it "the road of the righteous." I noticed your punk rock signature. Check out some Social D if you'd like some musical insight into sobriety. Ball and Chain is a drunkalog, I was Wrong the eighth and ninth step, and When the Angels Sing is the Promises. Also see the early Dropkicks stuff for lots of songs about alcoholism and recovery. The name of the band is taken from an old detox in NH. Keep rocking and keep keepig sober. Mikel - Boston

mikel60 09-30-2004 03:47 PM

OOh,
One more thing. A little e-s-h. That degree will be yours. I dropped out of college in a drunken fog. Ten years later, newly sober, I went back. I now have a Bachelors in English/PolSci, a Masters in Education, and will be returning to school next summer to pursue a D.Ed in Urban Education, provided that I get accepted, and I know I will. This man who was believed by many to have wetbrain, serves on the Board of Directors of an educational institution, guest lectures at local colleges, is a frequent contributor to local newspapers, and is a "valued and respected member of his community." This is not to boast, but to let you know that all things are possible in sobriety. I was the original "Barroom Hero" - face down in the gutter and allthat. No longer. Get thee to a University. You will be astounded and amazed by the results. Mikel

MootPoint 09-30-2004 04:57 PM

Danielle, I'm so glad you tried until you found some groups that you like. Instead of the 2000 that Joe mentions, we have 6 (I have to go out of town for the 7th day). Luckily, I like them all.


Mikel, your education sounds awesome! I would love to hear that fellow who was supposed to have wet brain.

findingout 10-01-2004 02:19 AM

Wonderful post! I have also found that each A.A. group is unique just as each A.A. member is unique. I have one meeting that is very small, just eight or nine of us and most have over 15 years of sobriety and some are approaching 30! I learn so much from these guys. I have another meeting that is much larger with more people who are just starting out and I learn so much from those people too.

With time I have found that A.A. provides a set of tools that just make life easier to deal with because they really do apply to things besides my alcoholism. All I have to do is remember that and use them.

Jah Bless

squirrelly77 10-01-2004 06:15 AM

Hey Mikel...thanks! I will definitely check them out. I like nearly nearly all music, but I tend to lean to the more "harder" genres. And, you wouldn't expect that looking at me. You would definitely think...um...okay BSB groupie! Well...maybe not that bad. Also...WOW...on your education. I hope to prove people just as wrong!
Findingout...just noticed where you're from. I'm sorta close. I live in Clarkston now. The meetings around here, Lake Orion, and Rochester have been the ones I'm talking about. Really, really cool.

Take care all.
:) Danielle

3legacy 10-01-2004 09:03 AM

(((((((((Danielle)))))))) :rose
I can't help but think of the difference between a functioning Home Group and a meeting. Early on in recovery I surfed many meetings that were not held by functioning Home Groups. Most of those meeting had little or nothing to do with Alcoholics Anonymous as I look back upon them. I have also heard that meetings of alcoholics are not necessarily meetings of Alcoholics Anonymous. I've been to a many taverns and seen meeting of alcoholics. I attended quite a few meetings listed in local newspapers that were apparently only set up to sign court slips and pass on keys to the building instead of keys to honesty openmindedness and willingness.

Went to a meeting of Alcoholics & Addicts last night that a local Counselor started in my community. They meet at the local treatment center. The Blind were leading the blind in this supposedly "closed" meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous. Its not the first time this same crap has happened and our elected trusted servants in the District tried their best to head this one off at the pass. Seems like the big city counselors who move to this rural community KNOW better than A.A. and decide they will do whatever the heck they want when they want to. From my perspective, this Meetings, Meetings, Meetings mentatility often takes away from the existing A.A. Groups effectiveness.

One of my Sponsee's is looking for a Home Group and asked the chairperson following the meeting when their next business(Group Conscience) meeting was to be held. The ADDICT chairperson said he would go ask his sponsor.............. :dunno OH MY>>>>>>>>>>>> He returned with his counselor.

I thank God for A.A.'s Spiritual Principles, but I am getting rather tired of having to spend so many hours wiping away the misinformation that outside folks continue to push into AA to suit their own personal agendas. There was a bright spot to it as the Counselor/Sponsor freaked out when asked if he were willing to open up our AA Literature with me, my sponsee, his CLIENTS, and possibly our elected District Committee Member. I suggested it might be a good idea prior to their next supposed GROUP CONSCIENCE meeting.

5 other attendees at the meeting last night went for coffee and opened up some of our A.A. Literature to help us all find a better understanding of How & Why A.A. still works as long as we are willing to use the proven effective means of operations. AA's Spiritual Principles!

I am so grateful when I really wanted the help I did not just get slogans & twisted bullsh*t but was brought into practical application of AA Principles instead by members willing to open up our AA Literature "WITH" me.

(((((((Danielle)))))))))))

Three Legs
:tri

squirrelly77 10-01-2004 01:08 PM

I understand...though somewhat vaguely due to my lack of experience, where you're comming from. The very first meetings I went to were like the ones you described--I can especially relate to how you described it as a place to have court-ordered slips signed. Although not everyone there was like that...I would feel bad if they never get a chance to see what I'm beginning to see.
This is the first time that I'm experiencing the willingness of AA literature being opened WITH me, as you describe it. I am also very grateful. And, I now have my own copy of the Big Book (which I never did these past few years in and out of recovery).

Yay!




:) Danielle

2dayzmuse 10-01-2004 02:52 PM

Right on Danielle!!! :You_Rock_

Way to shop around. I think you're getting a great deal. Some meetings can be...shall we say rather interesting. My first few meetings I attended, sent my red flag up. This reminds me, it's been awhile since I've traveled out of town to attend one. I'm way over due and will mark that on my calender. Thanks for the reminder. It will be a great way to view the beautiful scenery along the way. The changing foliage is awesome this time of year.

Sandy Marie 10-01-2004 03:13 PM

Thanks for the great post Danielle! I'm ready to change AA meeting location myself. I've made a couple of good friends that I want to keep in contact with, but it's time to move on. This post makes me feel like I'm not the only one. Thanks Danielle. Thanks guys. Have a great weekend.
Sandy

squirrelly77 10-04-2004 08:21 AM

Hey there everyone...I just wanted to follow up on this thread by posting about a meeting I went to Friday.
OMG.
It was sooo awesome. The first of it's kind that I've ever experienced. I have to describe it as being more of a club...albeit NOT exclusive, in fact very very open to new members. There was a TON of sobriety among the members and nearly all of them were really close and knew each other well. I told them about my situation and they were the most responsive group YET--they even went as far as sorta making the meeting about me...and how I had influenced them that night by my early recovery. That night I was lucky because 3 of the members were celebrating 15 years, and they bought 3 cakes for each one. I was able to experience that, plus one of them started a phone number list on one of the paper plates for all of the women to sign(it was really cute!) I was NOT expecting that. I wasn't really expecting the evening to turn out the way it did, but I'm so glad I went. And now, I definitely have a place to go to Friday nights that's better than any bar and where I feel like I can totally be myself.

:) Danielle

3legacy 10-04-2004 08:46 AM

(((((((Danielle))))))))
Ahhhhhhhhh what a feeling to come HOME!

squirrelly77 10-04-2004 09:03 AM

My sentiments exactly 3 Legs...I just forgot to put it in.
Thanks!

:nanarock Danielle :nanarock


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