Anyone here NOT do a 90 in 90 in the beginning?
that is a suggestion, from what I hear came from treatment centers.
I went for it. didn't make 90 in 90. there were times I could only make 3-4 meetings/week. but there was a week in there I did 15 in 7.
was I ok? no. that's why I did as many meetings as possible.
I went for it. didn't make 90 in 90. there were times I could only make 3-4 meetings/week. but there was a week in there I did 15 in 7.
was I ok? no. that's why I did as many meetings as possible.
I was limited to less due to the fact I live in a rural area. I did hit 4 meetings a week for several years.
Lol matter of fact, I still hit 3 to 4 a week most weeks.
The idea of that is to get a good foundation started in recovery. Idle time early on in recovery is not a good idea. Our thinking is distorted and can have thoughts of a drink going in with out a healthy diversion of a meeting, it's to easy to act out and take a drink
Lol matter of fact, I still hit 3 to 4 a week most weeks.
The idea of that is to get a good foundation started in recovery. Idle time early on in recovery is not a good idea. Our thinking is distorted and can have thoughts of a drink going in with out a healthy diversion of a meeting, it's to easy to act out and take a drink
I didn't because I couldn't. 90 in 90 isn't even an AA thing, it is nowhere to be found in any AA literature. This is the rehab industry pushing this. JMHO.
90 in 90 means nothing if you don't work the steps. There is one of those slogans "meeting makers make it". I call BS. "Step takers make it". That again, is JMHO.
90 in 90 means nothing if you don't work the steps. There is one of those slogans "meeting makers make it". I call BS. "Step takers make it". That again, is JMHO.
I definately did not do 90 meetings in 90 days. However, I did go to daytox after I had been sober for about a month and I found that helped as it was a daily thing I could do.
Looking back I didn't want to do the 90 meetings in 90 days cause I didn't think I really belonged in AA with "those people" and it was hard to find the time. Of course I could always find the time to drink and if someone had told me that I had to go to these meetings to get my booze, I would have made the time and would have gone with no hesitation.
I think it really boils down to how willing you are to try to do them. I do know now that I have to be willing to put as much effort into staying sober as I did into staying drunk. And believe me I put lots of effort and time in getting and staying drunk.
Everyone is different and everyone has to find their mojo so to speak. It is all in the attitude I think. If you really don't want to stay sober then 90 meetings in 90 days isn't going to keep you sober. But I am just speaking for me here and that is just my opinion.
Looking back I didn't want to do the 90 meetings in 90 days cause I didn't think I really belonged in AA with "those people" and it was hard to find the time. Of course I could always find the time to drink and if someone had told me that I had to go to these meetings to get my booze, I would have made the time and would have gone with no hesitation.
I think it really boils down to how willing you are to try to do them. I do know now that I have to be willing to put as much effort into staying sober as I did into staying drunk. And believe me I put lots of effort and time in getting and staying drunk.
Everyone is different and everyone has to find their mojo so to speak. It is all in the attitude I think. If you really don't want to stay sober then 90 meetings in 90 days isn't going to keep you sober. But I am just speaking for me here and that is just my opinion.
Poison Eater Extraordinaire
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Thanks for the replies.
Last week, my oldest missed a sports practice because my husband and I decided it was more crucial for me to go to a meeting. But this week, I felt stronger and decided I would be okay missing that meeting. With 3 kids who constantly need a parent around, sports and such, it is not possible to go every day unless something else is missed/given up. I was okay doing this (sacrificing THEIR schedules) my first week sober, but I am not okay doing this in the long term.
I know some people in the program like to say they chase meetings like they chased alcohol...but at some point I'd like to NOT live that way. For example, I'd go to the liquor store sick, but I'd like to say if I was sick one day now that I'd stay in bed, take care of myself, and miss the meeting....instead of running out to the meeting and jeopardizing my health further.
I do want sobriety. I want to work the steps and am still looking for a sponsor. But the fact of the matter is I have 3 kids who have very busy lives that I have to tend to. It sucks when people feel you are making excuses when you say this.
Last week, my oldest missed a sports practice because my husband and I decided it was more crucial for me to go to a meeting. But this week, I felt stronger and decided I would be okay missing that meeting. With 3 kids who constantly need a parent around, sports and such, it is not possible to go every day unless something else is missed/given up. I was okay doing this (sacrificing THEIR schedules) my first week sober, but I am not okay doing this in the long term.
I know some people in the program like to say they chase meetings like they chased alcohol...but at some point I'd like to NOT live that way. For example, I'd go to the liquor store sick, but I'd like to say if I was sick one day now that I'd stay in bed, take care of myself, and miss the meeting....instead of running out to the meeting and jeopardizing my health further.
I do want sobriety. I want to work the steps and am still looking for a sponsor. But the fact of the matter is I have 3 kids who have very busy lives that I have to tend to. It sucks when people feel you are making excuses when you say this.
There are so many circumstances and when you have children and a family to look after it is even harder to make the meetings. I totally understand that.
You aren't going to fail if you don't do 90 meetings in 90 days. And don't worry about what people think about your recovery. The only person that can judge your recovery is you. Their opinions do not matter and are none of your business.
If you want to stay sober, you will, just remember to take care of yourself while taking care of everyone else .
Poison Eater Extraordinaire
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"A meeting a day for at least the first ninety days of recovery is a good idea." (N/A basic text, page 53). 90-in-90 is from Narcotics Anonymous, not rehab. It probably floated over to AA because it is sound advice.
My town has hundreds of meetings per day. A daily meeting is doable. My grandsponsor got clean in Alaska, where there were 3 meetings per week. 90-in-90 is obviously not going to happen there. So it depends.
It is all about making a commitment to the program, IMO.
I went to more than 90 in my first 90 days. Probably more like 180. I have a husband and two active children. I did it because that is the commitment I made.
My town has hundreds of meetings per day. A daily meeting is doable. My grandsponsor got clean in Alaska, where there were 3 meetings per week. 90-in-90 is obviously not going to happen there. So it depends.
It is all about making a commitment to the program, IMO.
I went to more than 90 in my first 90 days. Probably more like 180. I have a husband and two active children. I did it because that is the commitment I made.
Hi freethinking, don't sweat over 90 in 90. One size doesn't fit all. Quality over quantity works best is my experience in sobriety. Some people can get more out of something than others, while others can't do much if their life depended on it. Being sober is another responsibility that starts on the top of the to do list, but eventually works its way down. Sobriety is an essential responsibility in my life, absolutely, though this does not mean sobriety IS my life. My life is more than just being sober, and 30+ years of living my life sober speaks for itself on how I've chosen my responsibilities.
Take it easy, freethinking. Enjoy your family life too.
Take it easy, freethinking. Enjoy your family life too.
THe first time round I went to 90 in 90. It was easy because I went to a lunchtime meeting near my office every weekeday, a meeting most evenings and sometimes two a day on weekends. I got kind of burnt out, funnily enough.
I now try to go to some combination of 2 lunch time meetings, my home group, a women's group and either a steps or BB study group. I'd do between 3 and 5 a week.
I now try to go to some combination of 2 lunch time meetings, my home group, a women's group and either a steps or BB study group. I'd do between 3 and 5 a week.
I hit five meetings a week in the beginning and now I do four.
There were times I did an extra meeting that week and one day I did three in one day and I think I OD'd on meetings..lol I was exhausted mentally and physically that day but guess what? I stayed sober.
There were times I did an extra meeting that week and one day I did three in one day and I think I OD'd on meetings..lol I was exhausted mentally and physically that day but guess what? I stayed sober.
I did something ridiculous like 210 or something like that in 90. Only reason being is that I was unemployed, been kicked out of the house and recovery was my only game in town. I am lucky to be in a large city where I do have those options. I just needed to be around sober folks and those doing the steps.
Having said that, it's not something I tell sponsees to do. I don't mandate 90 in 90. Early on it's good to hit meetings when you can, I feel, but it's not the point - working the steps are. Many folks have families and lives that still need caring for. Recovery is way of life, and is to be incorporated into our lives. There are times where I have gone to a meeting instead of a family thing and vice-versa. It just depends where one is in the step process and also in keeping some balance.
Having said that, it's not something I tell sponsees to do. I don't mandate 90 in 90. Early on it's good to hit meetings when you can, I feel, but it's not the point - working the steps are. Many folks have families and lives that still need caring for. Recovery is way of life, and is to be incorporated into our lives. There are times where I have gone to a meeting instead of a family thing and vice-versa. It just depends where one is in the step process and also in keeping some balance.
it was suggested to my by my sponsor that I commit to a specific number of meetings a week, leaving days open for working the steps and for with others and for practicing the principles in all of my affairs....
still working for me today!
still working for me today!
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