CarolD

gee I thought this thread was about good things in AA we have noticed.
How naive I am.

Once again...members are so busy picking AA and each other apart
some members would rather share on what's wrong than whats right.

Are you here to share in our solution? Are you offering hope and support to others?
I think not...how disheartening.

MickeyAnMeisce

Uh...I thought we could share the ups and downs of recover (including relapse), which I assumed involved discussing the difficulties in integrating ourselves in pre-existing groups.

TigerClub

Speaking to a relative old timer who said that he came in on the cusp of when cellphones became the norm. So often than not he would meet his sponsor at the meeting and that was it. He needed to get to a meeting to ge with the fellowship. For me the cellphone has been a lifeline, at times an extension of the fellowship/ staying in touch on a daily basis with my sponsor/other fellows when important.

I'd like to hear from some women/old timers/people who have been around for a while about how they have seen positive changes, from my list or anything else.

I wonder how in the past, London rest of England, and worldwide, how many younger people used to not return to meetings because they didn't feel they belong, based purely on the age range.

wellwisher

I can speak directly to that. My first introduction to AA was in 1989 (court mandated to open meeting, get slip signed) and the room was almost entirely consisting of men. I wasn't serious about getting help, of course, it was all about getting the license. Amazed at how I was intimidated in a roomful of men but thought nothing about walking along into a bar full of men and not feel so out of place (but I digress...)

On the flip side, I walked into AlAnon when I was about 19 to figure out how to get my mother sober. That room consisted mainly of women. I didn't stay there very long - my mother passed and I was working full-time on my own alcoholic path, and not in a very good way. Haven't been to Al-Anon since then, but these SR boards sure show me there are many men in those rooms these days. The Al-Anon members were kind but I felt out of place - they were talking about husbands; I was talking about Mom. I was made treasurer, which was nice. I fled when we started talking fourth step inventory with our workbooks. In my mind, the problem was my Mom, I didn't need inventory, she left this earthly plane, and I was on my own path on the slippery slope at that point.

When I re-entered the rooms in 1994 (after inpatient rehab and "field trips" on the bus with other residents) I lost my anxiety about entering the rooms. Rehab was I'd say about an equal mix of males to females, but I'm not sure if this was due to the housing limitations of the facility. It was full capacity, however.

I found more women at the daytime meetings early on. Today there is more of a balanced mix in the evenings. Could it be because more women work in the daytime now? Can't answer for sure.

What I find most intriquing and what has contributed most is the communcation available to us now. We didn't have home computers back then - that was really just starting to take off (after Al Gore invented the internet - ha ha) and cell phones were luxuries. I was told I could call my sponsor any time of the day or the night, but I had my own "code" - after 9PM - too late. Spent many a night "white knuckling" and anxiety ridden.

How wonderful is it today that there are forums like SR, and that text messages can be sent without fear of waking an entire household up. How fantastic that I can hear the buzz of the phone go off and find the message of someone struggling that I can answer while J. is sleeping away, undisturbed. My ear is tuned to that buzz of the phone - I never miss it. I did, however, not hear a tree fall onto my shed during an ice storm two years ago. What resources there are today.

To click on a link and get a free version of the Big Book at two in the morning; for online AA literature, for downloading books about sobriety on Amazon; for AA speakers in MP3 format...to find recovery options if AA is not working for ya...It is a richer world out there for those getting sober.

As a matter of fact, I probably never would be talking to London in the days of yore, now would I?

Glad to meet you. Thanks for the thread.

CarolD

As I already stated ...the net has been the most positive developement
that I am aware of since I began AA in '84....

My first home groups in D.C. and Fl. were mostly singles...who worked either
in the hospitality industry or government. I don't recall meeting any teens.
Both areas were full of all sorts of people from all over the world...so were our meetings...


Moving again...to small town Ga. I was delighted to see what I think of as
family AA" meaning we have members of different generations or siblings or spounces who often attend together
Yes the format has differed ...the size of the meetings and accents varied

not once have I ever felt excluded from AA I knew no one in AA in any of the places I've lived.
I now have hundreds of like minded people to care about and share with...
.
I'm a strong advocate of open the dorrs let everyone in to find their spirtual expereince.