RufusACanal

How important is personal gratification?

navysteve

The easy answer would be not at all. What is gratification? I think an easy definition is satisfying a desire...
I believe how we receive gratification is a direct reflection of how close we are with our God. I receive a certain amount of gratification out of serving others, in AA and out. I used to receive instant gratification in a bottle, drug, sex etc...

Today, instead of receiving gratification from substances, I receive true gratification from practicing spiritual principles

Tazman53

Nothing to add to what Steve said really, today my gratification comes from a Higher Power most of the time.

Emimily

well, i receive instant gratification from cleaning, so i don't mind doing dishes or folding clothes. i also get gratification from working hard, which is kind of a new thing for me...

i get gratitude from working with others, service work, and being there for my friends. prayer and meditation, practicing faith and really trusting the Big Guy don't bring me gratification, necessarily, but those are the tools i use the most to get through my day.

i don't know if "gratification" is the word i should be using. gratifying self is old behavior... building self-esteem by doing esteemable things is more along my lines of thought these days.

navysteve

Will you marry me?

lizw

I am the instant gratifaction queen. It goes against my nature to put 'character building' before my own feelings of comfort/happiness/contentment.

For example, if I get anoyed with someone, I want to tell them.
It is rarely my first port of call to examine the idea that the problem is in me.
Blaming it on the person I think makes me mad, IMO is a form of instant gratifaction. It is a 'quick fix'.
Examing myself and why I am an annoyed, is a more adult approach to the situation.

For me, the expression 'instant gratifaction' means immaturity.
It's like eating desert first.
2

Lol.

Tazman53

Personal gratification..................... I am sitting her shaking my head...... there was a day and a time that if something was not of a direct benefit to me I found no gratification, now I find my greatest gratification in the joy of others. I just got off the phone with one of my sponsee's, things have turned around 180 degrees for him in 7 months on all fronts, he called me just to say how great things were going, he told me that he owed it all to his HP, he said right now his biggest problem is deciding which good thing to deal with and not the lesser of 2 evils. To have been just a small part of that is gratification that warms my soul.

Emimily

LOL Steve, I don't think you can handle the rest of me that comes along with the cleaning. Thanks for the offer, though!

CarolD

I find external things make me feel good short term.
Especially when my self esteem or actions
require validation.


For lasting gratification...God and I are best friends.

Rowan

I was not blessed with patience. If I was mad, I reacted. If I wanted something to make me feel better i.e. sex, food, booze, spending money, etc, I did it. I never stopped to think before reaching for 'stuff'.

Some of the same things make me feel good today, but I am learning to hesitate and meditate, as we say. And I emphasis the 'learning' aspect.

Dee74

*faints*



D

Rowan

fraankie

i think we should all practice gratitude for the program
as where wood we be without AA?

gravity

I guess it depends on how you define personal gratification. Is it important that I am satisfied with my life? Yes.

Do I do things for my own pleasure? Yes. I am a bit materialistic. I like to work out. A rewarding career is important. Many of my hobbies are all about me – fishing, mountain biking, watching sports. But while these things may be enjoyable, I now recognize that they are temporary and will not bring me lasting happiness and serenity. I used to be way too focused on myself, wanting instant gratification and it was a very unhappy, selfish existence.

At a deeper level, the more I focus on being there for others, the less I focus on me. The more I live in the moment, the less I am focused on the past & the future. This is where I find peace.

There is a balance between being there for others - my responsibilities - and being good to myself. I am very satisfied with life. And it is sobriety and spiritual principles that are at the foundation of this good life.