Dad's been gone 8 years - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Go Back   SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information >
Register Blogs FAQ Members List Calendar Arcade Mark Forums Read




Reply
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 09-26-2018, 06:30 AM   #1 (permalink)
Member
 
tromboneliness's Avatar
 

Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Back East
Posts: 704

Dad's been gone 8 years


Yup, he kicked off on 9/26/10 -- at home, probably watching birds at the feeder in the suburban house I grew up in. We should all be so lucky, to go out that way, on hospice care just for being old, instead of in the hospital while the Health Care Systemô makes expensive and pointless attempts to keep a 90-year-old alive an extra day, week, or month.

And after 8 years... I have yet to figure out how I feel about the whole thing. You guys who are following along at home know I've still got some anger issues (ha! Along with a gift for understatement!), and I still don't talk much to most of my extended family, because of their meddling and taking his side most of the time while he and my Mom were dying... but, well, things may yet get themselves sorted out. It would probably help if I called my sponsor more often... Anyhow, these things take time, don't they?

T
tromboneliness is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to tromboneliness For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (12-18-2018), Eauchiche (09-26-2018), Seren (12-21-2018), trailmix (09-26-2018)
Old 09-26-2018, 07:07 AM   #2 (permalink)
Member
 
Eauchiche's Avatar
 

Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 1,388
My Dad passed away just before 9/11, surrounded by the family he had wounded. He left a lot of unfinished business in our family, chiefly making amends to us.

I have been on a personal journey of healing and sobriety since 2010. Part of my faith provides for us making sacrifices for the dead.

I performed a rite called a "plenary indulgence" for my late father just over 2 years ago. We don't really know what happens to the dead, but I received a total healing out of the deal. I can honestly say that the hurt and years of bitterness are gone.

My late Dad has become one of my biggest advocates now and a prayer partner.

Thanks for sharing your journey.
Eauchiche is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Eauchiche For This Useful Post:
tromboneliness (09-26-2018)
Old 12-18-2018, 12:47 PM   #3 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 636
I can hardy believe it's been that long. My thoughts are with you--and further communication! I've long since come to realize that when my parents die, NOTHING is going to get better because they've spread the family dysfunction and skewed vision to my siblings and it's now infecting nieces and nephews and to an extent my own children.
EveningRose is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to EveningRose For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (12-18-2018)
Old 12-21-2018, 05:26 PM   #4 (permalink)
It means 'star', as in the sky
 
Seren's Avatar
 

Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 10,228
Blog Entries: 8
Wow, tromboneliness, it's been 8 years! I've followed your story the whole time, and I remember thinking how incredibly strong you always seemed to me.

Yes, I suppose time can be a healer. I can't suggest talking to your sponsor or a counselor, but from what little I know of you...I know you will ultimately make the best decision for yourself.

Please take good care!
__________________
The ordinary acts we practice every day at home
are of more importance to the soul than their simplicity might suggest.
~ St. Thomas More
Seren is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:44 PM.