seasaw

Missed you guys! What's the latest? I guess I could just read some recent threads... Heh I will.

Let's see, for me, regarding my mother, things were totally quiet for months, which was great... got to a point where she didn't even cross my mind for days at a time! *wistful sigh*

Then Saturday before last, I got the news that my completely lovely grandma has finally fallen and broken her hip. I say finally because she's 103 and has been living happily and independently until now! But it looks like she's going to be in a wheelchair, and that's just not going to last for long at her age. SUPER SAD.

And, it means I'm probably going to end up in the same room as my mom sooner rather than later. I'm going to visit soon because there have been complications with Nan's fall, and my mom has apparently holed herself up in Nan's apartment indefinitely. We've been NC for since Aug '14. I am NOT THRILLED.

My aunt told me two interesting things...

1, though my mom professes to be sober, she starts off each day perfectly normal, but by the evening is making less sense, and then sends my aunt long rambly accusatory emails or calls and screams nonsense at her by midnight. Mhm. Yeeaaahh. She did lose her medical license so I know she doesn't have the easy access to pills the way she did before, but I have zero belief that she just 'decided to sober up' the way she says she did. (I don't get regular reports on my mom, my aunt knows not to tell me anything, but that is the little that I do know.)

2, I've moved since going NC and have been enjoying the knowledge that my mom doesn't know where I live. Joke is on me - she asked my aunt for my address, just to see if she would give it to her I guess, and when my aunt did the safe thing and said she didn't have it on her, my mom told her there was no need because she'd already gotten it from the attorney she'd hired. NICE! At least I live in a secure building.

Anyway, I'm just trying to mentally prepare for the idea that there might be no avoiding her if I visit Nan. I'm planning to treat her like a housefly buzzing around, like 'oh, is there a fly in here?' And then see my therapist every day for a week. :/

Anyway sorry for the novel, just wanted to say hi. And all the rest.

seasaw

I just went over some old threads! I want to thank my SR family (you know who you are!) for being there for me over the last couple of years. You have been critical to my survival, earnestly. To my ability to understand and process what was happening. And to anyone reading who I haven't 'met', it's great that you found this place - there's a better time coming!

ajarlson

Good luck with everything! Haven't been on in quite a while, every now and then I wonder about how my mom is doing but she doesn't seem to care if I'm not speaking to her and my life is SO much better without the drama that things are pretty good!

PurpleKnight

Great to hear from you Seasaw!!

CodeJob

Hello Seasaw!

I'm sorry to hear about your Nan's fall and need for a wheel chair. I hope you have a good visit with her.

I like this calmness and clarity in your post - you sound well!

seasaw

Aw, hi everyone!! This place sure has quieted down. Ebb and flow, right?

Yeah, SO much better without the drama right? I'm still battling depression - maybe even going on disability, ugh - but still I know that going NC was the only choice I could make. I'm so glad to hear things are going pretty good with you!!!!

And all the rest of you, you're always in my thoughts as well.

DesertEyes

Hi there seasaw

Yup. I think the biggest reason for the slowdown is the same as in real life meets. Peeps get _well_ and don't need this kind of support anymore. I think that is a good thing

We'll just keep the place open and the lights on for the next batch of peeps

Mike