Soberpotamus

Hi All

I'm not new to the forum, but thought I'd come in here and introduce myself as the adult child of an alcoholic.

I'm 67 days sober today. My recovery consists of: SMART, AA (complete with a very cool sponsor), Women For Sobriety, continuing care once per week as a follow-up to an IOP group I did back in April, and a biweekly therapy session with a pretty awesome therapist who is also an ACOA She gets me. Lol.

At age 36, I'm now going to deal with the ACOA/ACA side of things... not that I haven't "dealt" with them all along... no stranger to therapy! Haha. And I've read stacks of books. But my therapist has turned me onto Claudia Black's It Will Never Happen to Me. And I've bought the ACA Big Red Book for my Kindle just this week, and so thrilled to be reading through that! I totally identify as ACA. Well, most of it anyway! The Claudia Black book is tough reading too. Lots of stomach knotting going on! Anyway... I've had to put that book down a few times and let things settle. I'm almost finished with it though.

Made a call to my rehab and asked them if they could help me locate a f2f ACOA meeting in town. She is looking into it and will call me back. Last night I attended one online at the stepchat.com website.

I guess I'll be telling my story on here eventually But I've had many posts since joining SR in 2011 where I've relayed lots of things about my mom. She is deceased, died three years ago, drug overdose complications. She was an alcoholic and abused prescription drugs pretty much her whole life. So, I'm dealing with grief, guilt, anger... you name it.

Glad to have found this section of SR though... looking forward to connecting with you all

ACOAHappyNow

Future is looking great! I see such a strong commitment in you to health and away from the crazy making path, that I know you will make it!

Those of us who grow up in alcoholic homes suffer so much and often repeat the patterns we learned at home. Life beats us up one way or another, until we step off the path our families placed us on and find a new and better path of healing.

It's hard but it's the only way to get to peace of mind and genuine happiness, so we keep climbing the path up the hill to health, step by step.

I am glad you are here! But Im sorry for what you went through.

Soberpotamus

Thanks so much! That made me smile Your vote of confidence really helped.

ElegantlyWasted

Weird how this stuff works.. I consider myself an ACOA, Friends and Family as well as having my Own drinking issues. Lots of overlap. Congrats on the 67 days, about 20 behind you and hope to always be I know my drinking does not exist in a bubble and bounces of f/is related to the other stuff. Have a great weekend. Good to be around like minded people too.

Soberpotamus

Yes it is Ha!

Thanks very much for your post. And congrats on your sobriety!

Chris1000101

Welcome to the group!

I started in ACoA and found myself graduating into other fellowships. 67 days is great but please keep in mind that sobriety needs to be first or nothing else matters. I found myself overwhelmed as I sobered up and needed to put ACoA on the back burner for my first year or two.

Soberpotamus

Thanks Chris, well I think, oddly enough, focusing for a time on ACOA is just the thing needed to help my sobriety... I think I shunned therapy and delving deep into my family and past since my late 20's... so I think now it's time to get it out once and for all. I've kind of been down this path before And I don't think I was old enough or wise enough (imagine that!) to deal properly with it all...

My mom's death has freed me on some level. I think I can safely approach these things now. And it's the right time.

ACOAHappyNow

I wish you all the best as you continue to health and happiness.

Chris1000101

It is great to hear you are in therapy too. Sharing from my own experience here, it's a good idea to have a sponsor that is familiar with AA, ACoA and Al-Anon. 25 years ago I didn't know any better and my AA sponsor just beat the snot of me because he did not understand nor did he want to. Example: I chose to be born into the family I was therefore I chose to be abused.

Please don't make the mistake I did. Therapy and a good sponsor are your lifeline.

wellwisher

Hi Jennie:

It's good to see you again - and I'm glad to see you at 67 days! The results are so worth the effort, and it seems you are diving in with both feet. That is fantastic!

What I love about recovery is that what we used to believe is not what we come to believe as we recover, and that we aren't meant to carry around so much baggage. We can drop those beliefs (that were probably someone else's handed to us in our youth and which we readily accepted), and form a whole new set of positive beliefs about ourselves and others - it really is liberating. We've posted to each other about being the daughters of alcoholic mothers before.

This forum is not one I usually visit, but when I saw your name, I had to stop in and say hello.

All my best...

Soberpotamus

Hi Wellwisher! Yes, I remember our posts about our mothers So good to see you again too. Thanks for popping in here to say Hello! I really appreciate it.

DavidG

Hi Jennie,

Best of all you deserve. Towards the beginning of the AA Big Book it says: "half measures availed us nothing."

Coming from the Alanon angle I sometimes add: "Progress not perfection".

But why I responded to your posts was to congratulate you on your responses to Claudia Black. I have always loved Claudia's work. I understand she put a lot of oversight into the Big Red Book.

Sometimes when we go through all these influences- taking recovery and wholeness on board I look onwards to Concept 4.

The concepts must look a long way out at this stage- as you begin to take your baby steps.

No 4 is really the only one which reverberates with me- but it says why I 'mix it' with the crew- and stay involved...

Concept 4. "Participation is the key to harmony".

Jenny, I really enjoyed your share and its welcome responses. Thanks for the chance to add my tuppenny worth.


DavidG.

Soberpotamus

Thanks David! I will look into this concept #4 for sure. And it does sound like it'll reverberate with me as well... I always tend to isolate!