Gabe

FROM THE ADULT CHILDREN EDUCATIONAL FOUNDATION
COMPUTER BULLETIN BOARD - (703) 821-2925

SPIRITUAL HEALTH
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Even though...

- my parents weren't available to me, I can be.
- my parents couldn't admit that I had needs, I can.
- my parents were in denial, I don't have to be.
- my parents couldn't meet my needs, I am learning to.
- my parents couldn't say "I love you" when they were sober, I can admit my
love without being drunk.
- my parents used alcohol to hide their feelings, I can admit that I have
feelings, and I can let them in.
- my parents used alcohol to avoid listening to that still, small voice, I
can sit still and listen, even when I'm afraid of what I will hear.
- my parents didn't treat me as a real person, I am learning to recognize and
admit my own worth.
- my parents used alcohol to avoid change, I can be open to possibilities
without panic.
- I was raised in a home of denial, I don't live there any more.

I have needs, desires, and worth. I will shut off that phony smile or that
phony anger that has been used for so long to keep others away. I will open
my eyes and my ears to hear the world say "Hello!" I am learning that I can
sit quietly and listen and be afraid without losing my sobriety. I am learning
to say "I love you."

From Al-Anon ACA

DefofLov

I luv it!

ted

THANK YOU!
THAT A GOOD GOAL .

journeygal

OMG, that's part of the reason I always felt yucky whenever my dad said I love you. I totally missed the boat on this one...

paula a.

My dad could only say I love you when he was drunk too, and even then it was rare. When mom died a few years ago, he cried and cried about how he didn't tell her or us that he loved us often enough and now he didn't have the chance to tell her anymore. Now every time we talk or see each other (which is nearly every morning) he will not hang up or leave without saying I love you. It is very strange and hard to hear from him. It makes you feel like you might never see him again.

mooselips

WOW! So sad that so much of it is so true........