Introduce/Reintroduce Yourself here!
Dancing To My Own Beat
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: I don't know what kind of state I'm in
Posts: 1,326
Hey Gracie1953,
Welcome. Glad you found us. Feel free to browse, or post. Check out the power posts at the top of the forums. Lots of great info there. Hugs, Magic
Welcome. Glad you found us. Feel free to browse, or post. Check out the power posts at the top of the forums. Lots of great info there. Hugs, Magic
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: close to the FLAMES!!
Posts: 129
Thanks for welcoming me! It brought tears to my eyes. I think this is where my pain began, and being welcomed here just made me feel that even stronger. I belong here too, I found a new home!
-SFG29
-SFG29
Paused
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Dayton, Ohio
Posts: 2
hello
hello all, my name is Christina , my father has been an alcoholic for 20+ years. I came here seeking support of others in the same situation. After all these years, i still, and always will love my father, but I am having hard time dealing with his sickness. It has been a long road. im sure everyone can relate! Im glad i found this board! Thanks!
Dancing To My Own Beat
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: I don't know what kind of state I'm in
Posts: 1,326
Hi Christina,
Welcome to SR. Feel free to browse or post. There are a lot of people who are dealing with the effects of alcoholism on themselves and their families. You will find hope, support, and love here. I was raised by the adult child of an alcoholic, and find that I have many of the characteristics. I am married to a recovering alcoholic. There are many resources and tools offered here to help us recover and learn to change our lives from survival modes that we learned growing up, to being free to decide the direction of our lives. I have learned that I have choices today that I didn't know existed. I hope that you find as much help, support and recovery here as I have. Stick around. You are not alone. Hugs, Magic
Welcome to SR. Feel free to browse or post. There are a lot of people who are dealing with the effects of alcoholism on themselves and their families. You will find hope, support, and love here. I was raised by the adult child of an alcoholic, and find that I have many of the characteristics. I am married to a recovering alcoholic. There are many resources and tools offered here to help us recover and learn to change our lives from survival modes that we learned growing up, to being free to decide the direction of our lives. I have learned that I have choices today that I didn't know existed. I hope that you find as much help, support and recovery here as I have. Stick around. You are not alone. Hugs, Magic
Paused
Join Date: May 2004
Location: somewhere over the rainbow
Posts: 1
Hi all,
I am brand new to these boards.
I'm Sugarpie, an ACOA, even though my dad has never admittd to being an alcoholic, I am pretty sure he is. Dealt with it all of my young life living with him, loys of verbal but thankfully no physical abuse. Escaped to college, and have been about 500 miles away for eight years until a monrh ago...moved back to the old area. Now I see Dad more often, and see just how bad it has gotten, but he has no desire to change and will not listen to anyone who brings it up.
He is functioning, but I feel slowly deteriorating. I feel like it will all blow up in his face sometime, which scares me, but what can I do? He drinks whiskey in his coffee every morning, beer throughout his day at work (he is alone throughout most of his day), more beer at home at night...always a drink of some sort in his hand. His verbal abuse of the people in his family has not gotten any better, either. He constantly berates my mom and sister, and there is a third sister who now refuses to speak to him.
To make a long post short, I joined the board to talk with others who have gone through similar things...it is hard for other, "normal" people to understand what it is like to have a family member like this. Though I do feel normal now
unless I have spent any time around him! Then it's back to being a scared thriteen year old wondering what my father might do next!
Anyway, thanks for letting me vent! Have a great night!
I am brand new to these boards.
I'm Sugarpie, an ACOA, even though my dad has never admittd to being an alcoholic, I am pretty sure he is. Dealt with it all of my young life living with him, loys of verbal but thankfully no physical abuse. Escaped to college, and have been about 500 miles away for eight years until a monrh ago...moved back to the old area. Now I see Dad more often, and see just how bad it has gotten, but he has no desire to change and will not listen to anyone who brings it up.
He is functioning, but I feel slowly deteriorating. I feel like it will all blow up in his face sometime, which scares me, but what can I do? He drinks whiskey in his coffee every morning, beer throughout his day at work (he is alone throughout most of his day), more beer at home at night...always a drink of some sort in his hand. His verbal abuse of the people in his family has not gotten any better, either. He constantly berates my mom and sister, and there is a third sister who now refuses to speak to him.
To make a long post short, I joined the board to talk with others who have gone through similar things...it is hard for other, "normal" people to understand what it is like to have a family member like this. Though I do feel normal now
unless I have spent any time around him! Then it's back to being a scared thriteen year old wondering what my father might do next!Anyway, thanks for letting me vent! Have a great night!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
Originally Posted by Sugarpie
To make a long post short, I joined the board to talk with others who have gone through similar things...it is hard for other, "normal" people to understand what it is like to have a family member like this.
It's very hard for other "normal" people to understand what we're dealing with. That's why we're here. I'm glad you joined us.
Stick around.
Gabe
Guest
Posts: n/a
Sugarpie,
Welcome. My background is similar to yours. My father was an alcoholic and never admitted it. He treated us like dirt, but everyone outside of the family just loved the guy. They live two different lives, these alcoholics. I am always amazed.
Anyway, pull up a chair and stay a while. There's a lot of love and wisdom here.
Gracie
Welcome. My background is similar to yours. My father was an alcoholic and never admitted it. He treated us like dirt, but everyone outside of the family just loved the guy. They live two different lives, these alcoholics. I am always amazed.
Anyway, pull up a chair and stay a while. There's a lot of love and wisdom here.
Gracie
Paused
Join Date: May 2004
Location: San Diego, California
Posts: 1
*peeks in nervously*
hi, my name is maddy. i'm 20 and an ACOA i think. both my parents deny it, they say they are heavy drinkers and its not serious if it doesn't affect their functioning. but it is serious and for the past 10 years its just been getting worse. but its tricky because i really do love them and they really do function well, but they drink so much and even though its usually only wine they get so they can't walk straight and they can't remember our conversations and they embarass me. i really worry about their health. my mom's dad was an alcoholic too. my brother and i are really worried and its hard for me to do much because i am still very financially dependent on them. and to make matters more complicated i am severely mentally ill (schizoaffective). hopefully i can learn something here.
hi, my name is maddy. i'm 20 and an ACOA i think. both my parents deny it, they say they are heavy drinkers and its not serious if it doesn't affect their functioning. but it is serious and for the past 10 years its just been getting worse. but its tricky because i really do love them and they really do function well, but they drink so much and even though its usually only wine they get so they can't walk straight and they can't remember our conversations and they embarass me. i really worry about their health. my mom's dad was an alcoholic too. my brother and i are really worried and its hard for me to do much because i am still very financially dependent on them. and to make matters more complicated i am severely mentally ill (schizoaffective). hopefully i can learn something here.
Member
Join Date: May 2004
Location: No where
Posts: 79
Hiding
Hi
I was always Daddy's little girl until my teens and I realized that his drinking was a problem. It got worse. We all got the verbal abuse but usually not the physical only because my brother was 16 and could protect us all. My Mother had to start working because she had no money from my father to feed the 5 of us. We lived in fear and I learned to hide things and I can lie like a pro. I always thought my problems weren't really problems. Mom taught us to be somebody in life, independent, NEVER have to rely on a man for anything. And I mean anything! So I get out at 17, pregnant. Might as well do the things my father was accusing me of in his rants. And as he used to rant my mother would pretend nothing was wrong. The family went to counselling back then but my father would never participate. He is dead now and I regret that after he stopped drinking I never saw him. I could never forgive him. I now believe my 1st relationship was with an A too. I am now married 19 years with an A. He has been sober and going to AA for 3 years. I am starting to see the problems that I have. The anger, the control and the fear. I have tried 2 meetings and will go again but I DO NOT WANT TO. I would rather stay safe here where I feel I can talk but still no one Knows.
I was always Daddy's little girl until my teens and I realized that his drinking was a problem. It got worse. We all got the verbal abuse but usually not the physical only because my brother was 16 and could protect us all. My Mother had to start working because she had no money from my father to feed the 5 of us. We lived in fear and I learned to hide things and I can lie like a pro. I always thought my problems weren't really problems. Mom taught us to be somebody in life, independent, NEVER have to rely on a man for anything. And I mean anything! So I get out at 17, pregnant. Might as well do the things my father was accusing me of in his rants. And as he used to rant my mother would pretend nothing was wrong. The family went to counselling back then but my father would never participate. He is dead now and I regret that after he stopped drinking I never saw him. I could never forgive him. I now believe my 1st relationship was with an A too. I am now married 19 years with an A. He has been sober and going to AA for 3 years. I am starting to see the problems that I have. The anger, the control and the fear. I have tried 2 meetings and will go again but I DO NOT WANT TO. I would rather stay safe here where I feel I can talk but still no one Knows.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
Hey Chillgal,
Recognizing the behaviors we learned growing up in an alchoholic environment is the first step towards changing them. It is not an easy thing to do. Luckily, we have each other to lean on along the way.
Gabe
Recognizing the behaviors we learned growing up in an alchoholic environment is the first step towards changing them. It is not an easy thing to do. Luckily, we have each other to lean on along the way.
Gabe
Paused
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1
Hi there,
I am new here and an ACOA. My father was/is the drinker. I think my mom was an ACOA as well, b/c I've heard LOTS of stories about my grandfather. Anyhow, the dysfunction has continued very successfully into my (and my sister's) life.
I am not sure right now if my father is drinking or not...he says he is not, but...well you all know how that goes. It exhausts me.
anyhow, I'm glad I was led to this forum!
I am new here and an ACOA. My father was/is the drinker. I think my mom was an ACOA as well, b/c I've heard LOTS of stories about my grandfather. Anyhow, the dysfunction has continued very successfully into my (and my sister's) life.
I am not sure right now if my father is drinking or not...he says he is not, but...well you all know how that goes. It exhausts me.
anyhow, I'm glad I was led to this forum!
Its_me_jen
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
Hi -- I'm Jen -- both of my parents are alchoholics. I've been reading today and am overwhelmed with what I've figured out about myself reading these forums today.
Wow. I wondered why I was so weird! LOL
Wow. I wondered why I was so weird! LOL
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