How do I start??
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Toronto
Posts: 23
How do I start??
Hi there,
I am now just realising that growing up being surrounded by parents that were alcoholics and a sister that is an addict has effected me in many ways. How do I start to work through these issues? Where did you all start and do you have any suggestions as to books, websites, etc?
Sandy
I am now just realising that growing up being surrounded by parents that were alcoholics and a sister that is an addict has effected me in many ways. How do I start to work through these issues? Where did you all start and do you have any suggestions as to books, websites, etc?
Sandy
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
Posts: 4,426
Hello Sandy, and welcome to this quiet little corner of SoberRecovery 
Best place to start is right here in this forum Browse thru the sticky posts at the top, as well as the rest of the threads. You will find a lot of useful information, and book recomendations, just by browsing here.
Meetings usually have a great selection of books to choose from. Some al-anon meetings are focused just on ACoA issues, and they have some literature specific to us.
How to find a meeting in the US/Canada/Puerto Rico
Al-Anon Online Store : Home
ACoA has all of their literature put together into a single book, which makes it easy to choose what to get
ACA Fellowship Text
You can find ACoA meetings here:
World Meeting List
As you go thru all the material we have available toss out any questions that come to mind and we'll give you our perspective and experience.
Welcome again, I'm glad you decided to join us
Mike
Originally Posted by SW2012 
...How do I start to work through these issues? Where did you all start and do you have any suggestions as to books, websites, etc? ...
Browse thru the sticky posts at the top, as well as the rest of the threads. You will find a lot of useful information, and book recomendations, just by browsing here.Meetings usually have a great selection of books to choose from. Some al-anon meetings are focused just on ACoA issues, and they have some literature specific to us.
How to find a meeting in the US/Canada/Puerto Rico
Al-Anon Online Store : Home
ACoA has all of their literature put together into a single book, which makes it easy to choose what to get
ACA Fellowship Text
You can find ACoA meetings here:
World Meeting List
As you go thru all the material we have available toss out any questions that come to mind and we'll give you our perspective and experience.
Welcome again, I'm glad you decided to join us
Mike
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 688
Mike has great advice.
I found al-anon meetings very helpful, along with reading some of the daily reading type books--short little stories or thoughts for each day that helped me realize I had a lot of control in how I responded to the alcoholic, in being able to detach and live my own life focused on my own things instead of theirs.
In restrospect, looking back over the last 25 years, I think one of the best things I did was pack up and move far away both times my AF got out of hand. When I was 18, I moved a state away. The next time, when he threw me on a bed and choked me, when I was 23, I took my children and moved halfway across the country. As a result, by the time I moved back home at 36 and was once again subjected to the controlling, abusive behaviors, I had my entire adulthood of seeing something more like normal, and having people treat me with some modicum of respect, that helped me put their behavior in perspective.
How old are you?
If you can't move away physically, make sure you're living your own life, as separate from them as possible--your own friends, career, home, everything.
I found al-anon meetings very helpful, along with reading some of the daily reading type books--short little stories or thoughts for each day that helped me realize I had a lot of control in how I responded to the alcoholic, in being able to detach and live my own life focused on my own things instead of theirs.
In restrospect, looking back over the last 25 years, I think one of the best things I did was pack up and move far away both times my AF got out of hand. When I was 18, I moved a state away. The next time, when he threw me on a bed and choked me, when I was 23, I took my children and moved halfway across the country. As a result, by the time I moved back home at 36 and was once again subjected to the controlling, abusive behaviors, I had my entire adulthood of seeing something more like normal, and having people treat me with some modicum of respect, that helped me put their behavior in perspective.
How old are you?
If you can't move away physically, make sure you're living your own life, as separate from them as possible--your own friends, career, home, everything.
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