aasharon90

8 Like these cute little balloons
bouncing up and down with joy and happiness,
I never ever have to feel alone in what
happened to me as a child. And that
included you as well.

Today I am an alcoholic and an adult child
of an alcoholic in recovery and have been
for the past 21 yrs.

As I read posts and shares of other members
having gone thru some sort of abuse at the
hands of a sick parent, I can relate and feel
comforted knowing that I wasnt the only one
who went thru some sort of "hell" back in the day.

I would share with my little family what all
happened to me as a child and all I would
get was, "get over it, move on" as they never
could comprehend such horrible acts done
by anyone, especially from a parent, mainly
because it never happened to them.

Alone in my on rememberence of my childhood
abuse and not having anyone to who would
understand, i come here to SR and read how
you went thru the same similar experiences as
I and now i never have to feel alone.

So I thank you from the bottom of my grateful
heart.

LDT

Thanks for this post, aasharon90. It hits close to home. My parents were not alcoholics, but they were/are verbally and mentally abusive people. Their addiction is hate, and they share it freely. It's only in the last 2 years I've been able to talk about how that affected me growing up, and to an extent, still does. It did a hatchet job on our family. But if you met them you would never suspect it. They seem the perfect, happy little Ozzie and Harriet couple. Amazing, those facades.....I do not blame them for my alcoholism. I take full responsibility for that. But in order to stay sober, I had to detach from them. It's breaking their hearts, I know. But for me, it is the right thing. It has been a very difficult process. What I have learned is this: I am an adult survivor of domestic abuse....with emphasis on SURVIVOR! I am going to make it.

I am very grateful for your post.

dbh

Thank you for posting aasharon90.

Sometimes when I read the forums I feel so sad for everyone who is stuck in the cycle of addictions - the alcoholics, the souses, and especially the children. It just breaks my heart.

But then I also read posts that inspire me. There are so many people that I admire and who give me hope.

In the morning, I often pray/send positive thoughts to everyone on this group. I envision all of us getting strength from a power greater than ourselves. That's sort of how I feel when we say the serenity prayer while holding hands in meetings.



Right back at you!

db

aasharon90

LDT For sharing your own experience
so others as well as myself will continue to
feel comfort knowing we are "survivors" as
you say from our past and even present abuses.

I like you have divorced, dettached, separated
myself from my family of orgin in order to
live a happier, freer, healthier recovery life
for myself. To stay in the sickness of abuse
would have definitely killed me as it almost did
21 yrs ago. The care and concern of family
members, exspouse and inlaws sought emmediate
help for me when I couldnt help myself. In
doing so, a program of recovery saved my life.

As sad as it may seem, I no longer have
contact with my sick family of orgin but
do place them in the hands of the Man
upstairs for His care.

I was just thinking about how all this abuse
happened to me back when I was born in 1958,
and my mom sustaining abuse from her mom
earlier than that, and how times have changed
over the years, but how abuse continues even
today. I thought just because i was brought up
in the "old school" way of life, people would learn
over the years that abuse hurts and that people
dont abuse others, kids, like they use to. If that
makes sense.

Kids, people ARE being abused everyday, even
today which is soooooooo sad.

aasharon90

db, your share was very much
inspiring. I think of members like you as
little angels sent to SR to remind
us how special WE ALL ARE in one way
or another as we trudge the road of recovery
together.

Kialua

This forum is the only place I can share what happened in my alcoholic family of origin without getting the "deer in headlights" look from people. I really appreciate that and I appreciate all the people here that are working hard to overcome and succeed in their lives despite the trauma we all endured as children.

My siblings and I live separate lives with our version of "the truth". Even those of us who agree don't dwell on it because we suspect each other of not getting over it and don't want the baggage that emotionally crippled one of my sisters. Those who don't agree just blame us, label and separate. But they are the ones that are the most damaged and live in a fantasy childhood world that never existed. It's nice come here and see others dealing with reality.

aasharon90

Kialua

I like the "deer in the headlights" version of
how people react when we share about our
traumatic childhood with them. Maybe close
to this look too, lol.

Many of use use drugs, alcohol, sex,
gambling as our escape to numb the
pains of our mentally, verbally, sexually,
emotionally, physically abused lived
whether it happened as a child or even
as an adult.

We don't want to face reality which is to
be normal as we would wonder, what is normal.
We know no other way but pain, fear, unhappiness,
numbness, isolation, misunderstanding.

Many don't know that there is help available for
them or don't know how to get that help. Thank
goodness there are many program available to
help each of us as we learn to live life without
numbing out or blackening out the past. But rather
to learn from it to not pass on those abusive
experiences on to another vunerable person, child,
adult.

It's awesome to know we can learn from another
how to live a happy much normal life no matter
what cards of life was delt to us.