LeadHatter

in this book bradshaw talks about false self and how this comes to be. one idea he puts forward is that of life scrips that we act out rather than living from within [our true selves], he says that one way that life scripts come into being is attribution.

lots of the time lately i have been remembering a sneering father voice hissing 'you cant be bothered' at me. its a memory, i dont know when from but it does affect me. usually i would age regress and remind myself how i felt at the time and what i was thinking. however in this case i think for some fecked up reason i wanted to prove him right and either that or i believed it or both so i cant really shake this behaviour of identifying with this attribution my father has given me [that i cant be bothered]

the bradshaw book is a big book and im well away from the parts that discuss directly the solutions [although reading it has helped alot]

so i just wonder has anyone else had any experiences with living out parental attributions and how to shake them. for example i dont want to be lazy and idle but the definition [perhaps implanted by my dad] that i cant be bothered just seems to fit

how do i shake it