1st post, Back to No Contact
 

Hey everyone
I am a regular over at Friends and family of Alcoholic -really really love it. I am also ACOA, and it has controlled my life for so long, but I feel I'm bursting out of that mold, finally.

This is my first post here.

After, I dunno, a few months (?) of being sober but not treating his alcoholism, my AH is back to drinking and blaming me. It was nice while it lasted.

I actually drove him to the bar yesterday afternoon, during that short trip he said all the things he used to say-we can't be together because I'm crazy, I don't know how to run a household with two boys, two little dogs and a big orange cat, I'm unreliable, etc.

Those hooks used to tear me up. I would obsess about them, argue with him, hate him, feel utterly abandoned. He perfectly fit into my abandonment issues created by my alcoholic parents, like a lock and key.

But thanks to the program, and some help from my all loving HP, I have learned how to let go and turn away and get back to my life instead of obsess and buy into the drama.

I"m being careful though. I know I am totally susceptible to shifting into an all out abandonment freak out session, if I don't stay focused on myself and my life I"m working to make as fantastic as possible.

Transformie!
:ghug3

Hey Girl! I came over here to see if there's a difference. In what I don't know, but I am backtracking my madness and it always ends up with my family of origin. Fun...

Good for you for being able to maintain those boundaries and keep yourself sane. It's very easy to let those old hooks drag you back in. I'm glad that it didn't happen in this instance and I hope that any slips you do make are of short duration, and that you can forgive yourself for them (I seem to take a few days of beating myself up before I can forgive myself, but I get there eventually).

What a fine example of what recovery looks like!