NightandDay

can anyone point me in the right direction as far as this forum is concerned? i'm newly coming to terms with my codependency and working step 1. my codependency manifests itself in many ways, but has been inextricably linked to my sex life. .. always keeping a few partners around, with whom i have meaningful relationships, but have not really wanted to have sexual relationships with. . . but have done so anyway, because this seemed like the best way to keep them "on my side." friends have always just said, "oh, night&Day will always have a few boyfriends, that's just how it is." and i really bought into that -- hey, that was "just me!" i had thought for so many years that i was just an incredibly charged sexual being who needed a lot of sex to blow off steam, but now i am understanding how my behavior has really done the opposite. . create more anxiety and confusion. and the feelings i mistake for sexual tension are just other feelings getting diverted into my faulty sex drive, feelings that i am not in touch with and haven't yet understood or learned how to express.

is there anywhere on SR where this is the main topic of conversation? if anyone can guide me, i'd be very appreciative.

utopia

prob here and the relationships in sobriety one x

DesertEyes

Hello there NightandDay, and pleased to "meet" you

Actually, it depends. If sex is just a "tool" that you use to control men, then a good place to discuss that would be

Women In Recovery - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Some folks acutally have an "addiction" to sex, and we don't have a forum for that here on SR. The reason is that SR is public, and that kind of issue needs _real_ privacy. In that case I'd suggest you talk to your therapist and see if there are any Sex Anonymous groups in your area.

There are other websites that deal with sex addiction, but I am not familiar with any so I can't help you there.

Mike

NightandDay

hey thanks. . . i'm not sure which one it is, really. and believe me, i am certainly working on this with my therapist. i will try the forum you mentioned and see if that helps to shed any light on the subject for me.

someday231

I just wanted to say, you're not the only one. Womens meetings in AA and Alanon helped me connect with women and helped me learn self-respect (that I indeed deserved respect and to respect myself in many ways), and for men to respect me. I have also heard that said in AA. Feel free to PM me.