Hello - new from the UK!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 2
Hello - new from the UK!
Hi everyone
I've just joined - my mum admitted she was an alcoholic four weeks ago this sunday, so this is all quite new to us as a family, i havent been to any al-anon meetings or anything, i just wanted to find people i could talk to her. My mum has drank as long as i can remember, and my sister, who is almost 7 years older than me, says the same.
Some of the things she has done were bad, but she has also been through a lot in her life, and its been hard to reconcile everything, but i'm really proud of her for finally admitting it, and getting help. My sister and i have attended a couple of AA meetings with her and found them fascinating, and very humbling. They have also been filled with some of the nicest people i have ever had the pleasure to meet.
I don't really know how to finish this off, i just wanted to make my first post and introduce myself to people. I think there's going to be a lot of issues for me to work through, so i'm hoping to have impartial people to talk to!!
I've just joined - my mum admitted she was an alcoholic four weeks ago this sunday, so this is all quite new to us as a family, i havent been to any al-anon meetings or anything, i just wanted to find people i could talk to her. My mum has drank as long as i can remember, and my sister, who is almost 7 years older than me, says the same.
Some of the things she has done were bad, but she has also been through a lot in her life, and its been hard to reconcile everything, but i'm really proud of her for finally admitting it, and getting help. My sister and i have attended a couple of AA meetings with her and found them fascinating, and very humbling. They have also been filled with some of the nicest people i have ever had the pleasure to meet.
I don't really know how to finish this off, i just wanted to make my first post and introduce myself to people. I think there's going to be a lot of issues for me to work through, so i'm hoping to have impartial people to talk to!!
Being Me for the first time
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Wishek, North Dakota
Posts: 1,160
just wanted to say welcome to the family of SR , you will find many useful tools and wonderful ppl here , Im sure they will be here to greet you soon , thanks for shareing and were glad your here 
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Stumbling toward happiness
Posts: 4,706
hey there missthing -- welcome to the community and hugs 
Please feel free to use us as part of your support system whenever you need us. Lots of wisdom and kindness here just whenever you need it.
Good luck with your mom's progress. I know she will do her best, but whether or not she is successful in completely quitting alcohol, please keep yourself and your sister safe and healthy. Sometimes it takes several tries at sobriety - be ready for anything and try to approach it all with love and flexibility...and self-protection. Only by concentrating on ourselves and our own strength can we heal the damage caused by alcoholism....keep posting here, we're listening!
:ghug
Please feel free to use us as part of your support system whenever you need us. Lots of wisdom and kindness here just whenever you need it.
Good luck with your mom's progress. I know she will do her best, but whether or not she is successful in completely quitting alcohol, please keep yourself and your sister safe and healthy. Sometimes it takes several tries at sobriety - be ready for anything and try to approach it all with love and flexibility...and self-protection. Only by concentrating on ourselves and our own strength can we heal the damage caused by alcoholism....keep posting here, we're listening!
:ghug
AKA 'grewupinabarn'
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 471
Welcome missthing.
Yes, please come back, ask questions, and read. You can get a lot of inspiration and insight here. I have gotten a lot and its been only a few months since I joined. Jump over to Cafe Central for some word games - it give one a 'mingling with the crowd' feeling after reading/writing on more serious stuff.
You may note that some of the advice posted above is centered on you and your sister, and less so on your mom. Everyone, without question, hopes this works out and you can enjoy many sober years with her. Yet, it is a known fact that the path to sobriety is entirely under the control of the alcoholic, your mom, and a Higher Power. The wrong kind of caring makes the loved one of an alcoholic an enabler, which only prolongs/worsens the addiction and creates huge emotional upheavals for the enabler. Trust me on this - it happens alot, even in recovery. You have to detach yourself from an emotional investment in her recovery because it is the ONLY way to preserve your sanity and allow her the necessary space to stand up to the alcoholism on her own. There is a lot of talk in these forums about setting boundaries - these allow loved ones to show love and care without the giving alcoholic the kind of help that only hurts everyone.
Take care. You have my prayers. And a big welcome!
Yes, please come back, ask questions, and read. You can get a lot of inspiration and insight here. I have gotten a lot and its been only a few months since I joined. Jump over to Cafe Central for some word games - it give one a 'mingling with the crowd' feeling after reading/writing on more serious stuff.
You may note that some of the advice posted above is centered on you and your sister, and less so on your mom. Everyone, without question, hopes this works out and you can enjoy many sober years with her. Yet, it is a known fact that the path to sobriety is entirely under the control of the alcoholic, your mom, and a Higher Power. The wrong kind of caring makes the loved one of an alcoholic an enabler, which only prolongs/worsens the addiction and creates huge emotional upheavals for the enabler. Trust me on this - it happens alot, even in recovery. You have to detach yourself from an emotional investment in her recovery because it is the ONLY way to preserve your sanity and allow her the necessary space to stand up to the alcoholism on her own. There is a lot of talk in these forums about setting boundaries - these allow loved ones to show love and care without the giving alcoholic the kind of help that only hurts everyone.
Take care. You have my prayers. And a big welcome!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 8
Hello missthing!
I am also new to the group (I mean days). I'm amazed at the support and insight I've already witnessed and received on these pages. I know I'm coming back and I hope you do too.
I wish you all of the best as you begin this journey!!
I am also new to the group (I mean days). I'm amazed at the support and insight I've already witnessed and received on these pages. I know I'm coming back and I hope you do too.
I wish you all of the best as you begin this journey!!
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