christmas?
 

Christmas?
the spirit of goodwill and all that eh? All day ive been crying, ive got to go home for christmas in two weeks, the fun starts here.
i dont have a family anymore, i have a dad, a mum, a brother and a sister but no family.
I tried so hard for so long to keep my family. my dad's talking about putting up the decorations.........why? why pretend? all it'll amount to is a row over something and then we'll go again. back to our own seperate lives.
what did we do? all of us? even my mum? why weren't we enough for her. if my love wasn't good, strong enough for her, how can i love anyone else?
i'm so lonely.

Oh dahlin'

Your love is good it is just the people don't know any better. I don't do christmas any more too painful, too fake...call me scrooge bah hum bug...

Christmas is a time for giving.

When you give of yourself, you change others. If others don't say thank you or understand your giving, they miss out on the blessings, not you.
I can touch the lives of others or I can side with others and touch lives in a negative way (if that be their way)
It is through giving that we receive. Give a smile and receive the understanding that you are doing right and your heart will rejoice. Keeping your own heart warm just may cause others to smile. *Smile*

ps;

They say it isn't the size of the gift but the thought that matters.
A smile is the one exception to that rule.
Give them the biggest smile you have...It is the one gift that size does matter. *HUG*

In communications and relationships, there are two things that have to be present: the sender and the reciever.

If you are the sender, but the reciever is broken, the message won't go through. You may have more love inside you than anyone else on the face of the earth, but if the recipient of that love is incapable of seeing it for what it is, there is nothing you can do.

You didn't cause it. You can't cure it. It isn't about you. It is about broken people who are incapable of accepting what you are giving them.

All that being said, I dread Christmas also. This year my family will be somewhere else, and I won't have to deal with what I call "the dance". I'm pretty happy about that.

I'm sorry you're having such a rough go of it. It sounds like your family has an elaborate "dance" they do around Christmas too. Everyone has their choreographed role, and everyone knows it so well that they do it without even thinking.

Maybe this Christmas you can try to sit this dance out. Maybe you can do something different to take care of YOU and let the others fend for themselves. Y'never know, it might work.