Good questions...
Originally Posted by Don S
What do you believe caused your substance abuse behavior?
What is the source of motivation to change, what sustains it, and what do you rely on when you have doubts or ambivalence?
Where do you believe the power comes from to change?
I think that a multitude of things caused my ridiculous drinking behavior. I think that I was (and still am) a very shy person, and once I realized that
shyness + alcohol = fun-loving person who everyone loved to be around, I had a hard time parting with it. I think that alcohol is a very manipulative drug that has different effects on everyone, but I DO believe that my body metabolizes and processes alcohol differently than that of people who do not drink, which definitelly leads to the disease. I think it is a sleeping giant. There is a reason I was always the person who REFUSED to stop drinking, rising people from a deep sleep to play beer pong with me in high school, and the one to order more drinks than anyone at the bar...a tiny little wafe like me of 100 pounds. So, I think it has social, emotional, and physical connections to me, and it was truly love at first drink...
I have incredible motivation to change because I realized that I was drinking away my life, I fell into an incredibly deep depression, and I now realize how talented and gifted I am. My motivation is to tap into my unlimited potential, which I will come nowhere near if I continue to dig myself a grave with alcohol. My strenth comes from within (I know that's cliche, but it's true.) A lightbulb went off one day, and I realized how much I was wasting my life. I always used to accept challenges head-on, and now I am on for the fight of my life. An INCREDIBLY difficult challenge, but one that I need to conquer in order to live the life I want to live.