Tiro -
Hi and welcome to SR.
Your post explains exactly what I am going through also. This forum since it started here and really rocked my memories of my childhood into full swing. Reading this forum has brought up so many things that I forgot, or maybe did not want to remember on purpose.
In discussing these things with my sponsor she had some good points. She explained that with all these things I am remembering, not only am Ihaving to deal with them but also what a spin it sends me in to think that all these years of sobriety I walked around saying and thinking I had the 'normal' childhood. What I am learning now is that I need to grieve. I need to work through things that happened to me and grieve for the years of childhood that I lost. I can't get those years back but I also can't let them hold me down. I - like you have some years in recovery (congrats by the way
) and for me my HP must think it is time for me to deal with this stuff or HE would not have me remembering it.
We don't have to be quiety about this stuff anymore. We can come here and talk and share and learn from others. When my mom had a breakdown when I was about 9 is when (I know now) that my traits of having to make everything okay for everyone started. In a post a few weeks ago when I realized that it was like I had been whacked upside the head with a skillet (not yours JT) and things are changing for me since then. It is stirring up some interesting stuff around my house, but you know what? I was told recently by a wise woman, that the people around me either have to stay in the boat when it is rocking or they have to jump out. We have to take care of ourselves first.
I think I got way off track here with you, sorry, I tend to do that now and then
.
I am glad you found SR and I believe that sharing together we can work through this stuff, and we already have a huge advantage....the 12 steps are a working part of our life.
Okay i will stop now.