Hey there equus,
What you went thru is called a "meltdown" on this side of the pond. The old feelings that came back today we call "echoes". It's a part of the "Grief process". Whenever you revisit and intensely painful memory you will get a little bit of the old feelings back. Each time with less intensity until finally it is just a dull ache.
The medical system over here is not any different. I've been thru the same "stuff" with my wife and more recently for me.
It gives me hope to know that you are doing your part to make the world a better place. Your willingness to fight the system and do good for the kiddies is how society as a whole makes progress. Each one of us does our part and little by little we all benefit.
As always, you rock
Mike