Thanks guys for your words of wisdom and experience. It's so helpful for me to build on your expertise, like standing on the shoulders of giants.
DriG - I think you've hit the nail bang on the head when you said it was something that happened, a "Natural transition..! I think it would have happened for me but it helped when it was pointed out by my keyworker/rehab team. This kind of speeded up the process making it more revolutionary than evolutionary, if that makes sense?
Dee, to answer your question on where am I on the scale. I've accepted it isn't a fight because if I was to fight everyday for the rest of my life then I would be so low emotionally and exhausted that there wouldn't be a point in me being here., therefore acceptance and surrender are massive to me. A lecture by Bob D from AA entitled surrender helped me out as does all the great feedback on SR. I will no longer view it as fighting but a conscious positive turning point in my journey.
Thanks guys - you're all great -so knowledgeable and helpful!! I'm lucky