I think its learning how to live life on life's terms.
When things don't go my way what's the next right move?
There can be a brief period of serenity between that first drink and oblivion/disaster. I think many of us crave this serenity so bad that we disregard the consequences. In our minds we far overstate how long the serenity from a few drinks will last. And we far understate the consequences. The long term trend from drinking is less and less serenity, more and more misery.
I think that's why many with long term sobriety have some kind of religion, spirituality, meditation, some kind of peace with God or Nature or whatever you want to call it. An ability to not take things too seriously.
Exercise as well. This provides a natural sort of chemical reaction that delivers an immediate feeling of serenity.